Work: Today, I have been at my new job for almost a month and still...

By soconfused - 03/03/2015 10:15 - United Kingdom - Belfast

Today, I have been at my new job for almost a month and still have no idea what I'm doing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 348

You deserved it 11 505

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 17/11/2016 01:29

Today, I'm starting a new job. Only problem is, I haven't been told what my duties are, who my line manager is, or who to ask if I need help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 747

You deserved it 923

Where am I?

By Morgan Jones - 18/06/2019 20:08

Today, I went to work at my new job, where I thought it would be super easy because I shop there all the time, and already know where everything is. Turns out, they're remodelling the store, so I don't know where anything is anymore, and the bosses get mad at me for being too slow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 597

You deserved it 436

By I know nothing - 05/02/2017 07:00 - Canada - Surrey

Today, I start my second shift at my new job. Apparently, I'm closing by myself. I have no idea what I'm supposed to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 940

You deserved it 536

Bored senseless

By Anonymous - 01/10/2010 16:55 - United States

Today, I started my first day of work. I was told to absorb everything going on and to get used to the high-paced flow of things. I've been sitting at my desk for two hours now, and the office has been empty since I've walked in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 313

You deserved it 2 988

By Anonymous - 17/11/2014 16:59 - United States

Today, after driving hundreds of miles to sign the paperwork for my new job, I found out the guy who hired me recently quit, and HR has no idea who I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 559

You deserved it 2 587

By screwedfortheweek - 28/01/2016 23:39 - United States

Today, I started a new job. After being trained on several obscure computer programs I'm expected to use in just one day, my new boss informed me she's going on a week long vacation starting tomorrow. She's the only other person who knows how this program runs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 865

You deserved it 1 491

Anyone there?

By Anonymous - 22/03/2021 11:01

Today, I'm still waiting for my current job, which gaslit me in various ways for a year, to acknowledge my month's notice. My new job starts in 3 weeks. I'm genuinely not sure if my (ex) managers and HR are all on furlough, or if they're just fucking with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 920

You deserved it 105

By jxfc - 07/11/2016 08:11 - United States - Tracy

Today, as I was helping a customer, she asked if it was my first day and who was training me. Evidently, I'm bad at my job, because I've worked there for 7 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 608

You deserved it 1 537

By jobless - 08/09/2016 18:18 - Canada - Sherwood Park

Today, after a month at my new job, my boss fired me because I didn't have enough experience. She hired me with full knowledge of this fact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 974

You deserved it 938

Can't win

By notamindreader - 09/10/2024 08:00 - United States - Freeport

Today, I've been working for a company for six months, but I still don't know my job fully because my trainer is difficult. He would get mad because I'd wait until he was done explaining before asking questions, so I changed and asked as soon as he said something I didn't know, but would get, "Well, if you'd let me finish…" FML

I agree, your life sucks 416

You deserved it 79

CreamGravy 36

Tuesday 3 March 2015 16:18

Doesn't matter, got paid?

Patriots21 14

Tuesday 3 March 2015 16:19

I don't know if this is a reflection of a lack of motivation on your part, or a lackluster company where sub par work is acceptable.

Comments

trex9513 5

Wednesday 4 March 2015 3:41

That's what training is for dumbass

PropelledFeline 5

Wednesday 4 March 2015 3:56

That means this job is teaching you a valuable skill. Jobs that only take a week to master aren't as valuable.

rockwrench 18

Thursday 5 March 2015 1:58

Totally tracking with you #83.

IceMan11 23

Wednesday 4 March 2015 4:29

Make sure to get that penski file done by Monday.

MissyPastaCreeps 16

Wednesday 4 March 2015 5:23

So you're Barney?

CandyApple88 13

Wednesday 4 March 2015 10:48

Ahh i see my former supervisor has moved on and done the same thing in their new role!

smackaroonial 20

Wednesday 4 March 2015 16:57

This sounds vaguely like school. Are you sure you're not in school somehow?

Nysha 17

Wednesday 4 March 2015 17:09

You need to watch S02E09 of Black Books.

Bludude4 10

Wednesday 4 March 2015 22:13

Fake it 'till you make it?

thatonedude55 8

Thursday 5 March 2015 16:00

I thought that was normal.

Stillo 25

Thursday 5 March 2015 23:22

Hopefully you aren't a doctor or something :D

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend’s dad has a sword he inherited from his dad that he claims links their family to the old Swiss nobility. I work in a museum so I know most of the makers' marks on swords, so I’m not sure how to tell him his sword is a reproduction made in Spain less than 100 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 450

You deserved it 88

Today, I was driving without my seatbelt on, when I noticed a police car approaching. I panicked and desperately fumbled around for my seatbelt, only for them to pass by with just a funny look. Then it hit me that I was riding my motorcycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 551

You deserved it 49 635

The Top

Today, my boyfriend wrote me a love letter saying about how much he cares for me, how he'd die for me and how he wants to spend his life with me. What really took my breath away was the confession at the end about how he "accidentally" cheated on me with my best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 111

You deserved it 1 605

Today, I was in the shower getting ready for a date, when my older sister thought it would be a laugh to turn out the light. Getting out of the shower to turn it back on, I slipped and hit on my head on the counter. Thanks, sis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 516

You deserved it 3 103

Today, I was in the hospital for 12 hours with unbearable stomach pain. Apparently I have a horrible infection in my intestines and colon. My mom is now accusing me of having anal sex and allowing a man to ejaculate into my bum. My great-grandma believes her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 569

You deserved it 744

Today, after a large, dramatic fight with my girlfriend in a parking lot, we stopped arguing altogether and hugged, dropping the issue. Twenty seconds later, I accidentally slammed her hand in the car door, breaking two of her fingers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 833

You deserved it 14 275

Today, my neighbors threatened to sue me because a six-foot branch fell off one of my trees and into their yard, hitting nothing on the way down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 219

You deserved it 232

Today, I scored an interview with a hospital nearby my house, and so I ordered a car 30 minutes before. There were four people in the same car that were picked up AFTER, and dropped off BEFORE me, causing me to miss my interview. The hospital then stopped interviewing for the same position I wanted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 836

You deserved it 468