Intimacy: Today, I held up my best friend with a lighter shaped like a...

By oface13 - 16/04/2012 08:12 - United States

Today, I held up my best friend with a lighter shaped like a gun, and jokingly accused him of sleeping with my wife, only to have him admit that he really did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 325

You deserved it 5 968

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Same thing different taste

Mind your own business

By Anonymous - 16/06/2022 16:00

Today, I caught my best friend's wife being a cheating whore, and I told her either she told him the truth or I would. More fool me, she used the time I gave her to convince him I tried to sleep with her, so now he won’t believe a word I say, and he punched me in the jaw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 213

You deserved it 239

By Anonymous - 15/08/2012 04:04 - Australia

Today, I witnessed my girlfriend and best "friend" getting intimate. In a dim-witted attempt to cover up, my best friend proclaimed, "This isn't what it looks like!" I might have given him the benefit of the doubt, had he not still been inside my girlfriend at the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 617

You deserved it 2 540

By wow - 27/05/2013 16:17 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I found out that my husband of 12 years has been sleeping with my best friend of even longer for who knows how long. She actually tried to turn it around on me and implied that it was my fault for finding out about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 270

You deserved it 3 814

By desertpunk75 - 19/01/2011 03:40 - United States

Today, my friends thought it'd be funny to hold lighters under the smoke alarms while I was sleeping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 842

You deserved it 3 168

By innocent - 19/04/2017 00:00

Today my best friend called me at 6 a.m., ranting and accusing me of sleeping with her husband. I live two hours away and haven't seen him in person in over six months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 453

You deserved it 339

By Anonymous - 27/03/2018 22:00 - United States - Papillion

Today, I caught my boyfriend cheating on me with my best friend. He actually had the balls to say her leg was asleep and he was trying to wake it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 497

You deserved it 361

By dumped - 23/08/2015 10:22 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I told my friend about a fight I had earlier with my girlfriend. He thought it'd be funny to use my phone while I was in the bathroom and text her "ure such a cunt". She wouldn't believe the truth, even when my friend confessed to her. She thought I paid him to take the fall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 485

You deserved it 2 475

Nope

By Anonymous - 07/04/2023 16:00

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of two years. I got a call from my best friend telling me he had slept with her before we went out drinking the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 279

You deserved it 159

By Anonymous - 19/09/2014 15:30 - United States - Montpelier

Today, I went with a couple of my friends to see a friend who's fallen very ill. Her dad walked in with a gun and demanded to know which of us had gotten his daughter pregnant. By the time I realized it was a joke, I'd already pissed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 535

You deserved it 5 261

By Anonymous - 25/10/2013 23:55 - United States

Today, I found out that my girlfriend has been sleeping around. After telling my best friend, I also found out that he and a few others have known for the past month. He asked, shocked, "Dude, I thought you knew?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 649

You deserved it 3 969

beastmode707 1

Monday 16 April 2012 16:00

Should have been a real gun

DocBastard 38

Monday 16 April 2012 16:02

And then you set his ass on fire, right? Right? Very little pisses me off more than infidelity.

Comments

JaynLyss 0

Monday 16 April 2012 19:37

woulda ran to the house for a real one

MigraineurOfLife 15

Monday 16 April 2012 19:38

This sounds like something I've seen on a show on TV.

KiddNYC1O 20

Monday 16 April 2012 20:06

Laguna Biotch.

Brelywi 15

Monday 16 April 2012 20:04

"Oh...well, uh.... Bang?"

FUCKNAMESBREH 0

Monday 16 April 2012 20:37

What if he was counter trolling? :o

xXSecondGuessXx 0

Monday 16 April 2012 22:48

At least you found out..? I dunno.

toxicpinkcandy 10

Monday 16 April 2012 22:55

I would be beating the crap outta him right now and be thinking of ways to ruin his life rather than sitting there posting it on FML. No wonder she cheated on you. Grow some balls you passive aggresive dumbass. YDI

monique8axel 6

Monday 16 April 2012 22:58

You see that's when you burn his nuts off

trollierthanthou 1

Monday 16 April 2012 23:08

thats when i would have actually used the gun lighter.... And a gallon of gasoline.... And his wife (if i was a guy,of course)...

KOn311 2

Monday 16 April 2012 23:08

Let's all go and correct everyone's spelling and state what they just wrote isn't valid because they can't spell to others expectations. Oh no! It's the end of the world! People need to focus more on what people are saying rather then how it is spelled. Criticize what really matters and spelling doesn't matter in this case, unless you can't comprehend what someone is saying completely.

trollierthanthou 1

Monday 16 April 2012 23:21

okay people, let us just take thy oath to not correct others and not thumb others down for their mistakes. Should go as thus: " I shalt not correct thou mistakes. I shalt not be thy donkey's rump. I shalt not thumbeth thy Fml neighbor downeth for his grammar mistakes. This pledge I shalt keep. If I shall break it, thy thumbeth downeth shalt be welcome."