Intimacy: Today, I hooked up with a girl from the bar. We went back to...

By galen - 03/06/2009 06:06 - United States

Today, I hooked up with a girl from the bar. We went back to my place and started making out, I took off her shirt and bra and started kissing her breasts. I felt her chest hair tickle my tongue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 024

You deserved it 27 729

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Same thing different taste

RIP Beard

By captain patch beard - 03/10/2019 18:01

Today, I met a girl at a bar, we had a few drinks and really hit it off. We headed back to my place to get a little action. As she was riding me, she got rougher and rougher until she reached down and yanked a patch of hair right out of my beard. I yelped in pain and didn’t even finish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 121

You deserved it 442

By Anonymous - 09/11/2015 00:18 - Netherlands

Today, after months of Tinder-ing, first dates and being rejected, I finally was able to hook up with a girl. We met, we kissed, we danced and I took her back to my place. She then promptly tried to make out with my roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 252

You deserved it 3 177

By Anonymous - 04/09/2011 16:21 - United States

Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 294

You deserved it 6 391

By Anonymous - 09/02/2013 05:13 - United States

Today, I was talking to the girl I really like, and she was telling me how crappy her day was. Trying to be nice, I gave her a back rub. I somehow managed to unhook her bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 429

You deserved it 9 059

By checkup - 15/07/2012 00:50 - United Kingdom - Redditch

Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 310

You deserved it 5 081

By shallowvomit1013 - 23/12/2009 01:09 - United States

Today, my girlfriend came over to my house. Hoping to get a little action, i started to make out with her. Unfortunately I was wearing basketball shorts so when I got an erection all she did was bat it back forth like a cat toy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 042

You deserved it 5 426

Get away from me

By Jinthebar - 06/05/2009 04:13 - United States

Today, I was at a bar talking to a very attractive young woman. I began to see that she wanted me as she pulled closer and closer. Eventually she pulled me in and licked my ear lobe sensually. She then said, "I wanna break your collar bone" in a seductive tone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 150

You deserved it 7 960

By shit.... - 08/11/2012 18:25 - Malaysia - Kuala Selangor

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 636

You deserved it 31 360

By Walter - 24/10/2015 03:17 - Spain

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting heated. I kissed her on the neck, chest, stomach, and threw up as I kissed between her legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 132

You deserved it 6 252

By humiliated - 26/02/2010 10:21 - United States

Today, I was finally hooking up with a girl I was after for a long time. Things got really hot and heavy but she stopped and looked at me weird. She said, "I can't do it, you're really wet. It looks like chicken fat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 898

You deserved it 4 042

kellster 2

Wednesday 3 June 2009 16:05

Either she was a tranny, or you're really exaggerating. You do know that people have body hair, right? As in, the tiny, fuzzy kind? You'd probably better get over that pretty soon or you'll never have sex again.

icanhazlizard 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 16:21

I agree with 3 and 6. Hair is a natural part of being human. The girls are already expected to shave way more of their bodies than men have to be socially acceptable. I'm sick of hearing about how the hair on girls is disgusting. We shouldn't be rejected or made to go through ridiculously elaborate and time-consuming grooming routines because of it. It's *natural*. Get the **** over it.

Comments

HyperFlirt 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 5:23

I agree with #10 and #17. Get over yourself. **** your girlfriend's life for having such an insensitive, sexist boyfriend.

paniclovie 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 5:33

GET OVER YOURSELF, GUYS. women have hair on their bodies, because they're humans too. we shave our legs, our armpits, we wax, and that's on top of ******** ourselves about how we dress and how we look. how much more do you expect from us?

iknowyou 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 5:49

guys r shallow this is coming FROM a guy

biedrzycki_love 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 6:19

#27 You must have never had a girlfriend. Or they are too shy to ask you to do it to them. It's not disgusting at all, I find it very arousing and so does my boyfriend. Even my boyfriend enjoys when I kiss his nipples. A few stray hairs on woman are perfectly natural. Sometimes it even occurs around the navel, neck, and chin. @OP You seem extremely shallow and immature

truman_fml 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 6:25

Wow.. seriously dude its a little hair. What the **** are you gonna do about it? I think this is REALLY LOW for men. Athough im a guy, i dont mind a little hair. I mean really dude. WOW

Jessaly_fml 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 6:39

Sorry, are women not allowed to have hair anymore? Are we supposed to suddenly evolve into hairless humans, all for the sexual satisfaction of some men? I'm so glad that I never do anything "beauty"-wise for guys. And strangely enough, I'm still loved. Imagine that!- not disliking someone for being a mammal!

ph900921 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 7:20

agreed... 10 is hairy and disgusting and likes to get it on with similarly hairy girls

BalenciagaBetch9 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 7:31

#10 you're my hero. i'm looking at my boobs, and i don't see any hair. and #199 i love dlisted too! ahhhh

plumbago 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 7:38

There is something called polycystic ovarian syndrome, that I happen to have, that often causes excess body hair, and it's become something I am very sensitive about. Even women with nothing wrong with them have problems with it too, but in both cases it is not the fault of the woman, but as the OP has shown people seem to be insanely insensitive about it. I am truly disgusted that you think something like that is even worth commenting on, let alone submitting to a website. It would be like someone making a comment about how small your dick is, whether or not it is makes no difference. OP and everyone agreeing with him really need to stop being so closed minded and shallow.