Love: Today, I kissed the girl I love for the first time. Her reaction?... - FML

By alf - 27/10/2008 02:34 - France

Today, I kissed the girl I love for the first time. Her reaction? She vomited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 889

You deserved it 7 259

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/08/2010 20:20 - United States

Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 922

You deserved it 6 674

By shitfaced - 18/09/2015 17:30 - Netherlands - Sassenheim

Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 676

You deserved it 9 516

Poor me

By Anonymous - 10/11/2019 03:00

Today, I finally kissed the guy I really love at a party. He took me outside and immediately vomited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 014

You deserved it 242

Magic moments

By youmakemesick - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of four years. Her response? First, she threw up all over me, then she started crying hysterically. I'll take that as a no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 013

You deserved it 2 833

By notsober - 20/03/2012 05:49 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. About 2 hours later, he got to hold my hair while I puked, also for the first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 056

You deserved it 6 947

By jimbop - 23/05/2009 17:48 - Canada

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my girlfriend after a night of heavy drinking. She rolled towards me, looked me in the eyes and sweetly said, "I love you". Her morning breath was so bad that I had to jump up and rush to the bathroom to vomit, leaving a trail along the way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 921

You deserved it 10 325

By hamboneghost - 24/02/2015 19:02 - Canada - New Westminster

Today, I greeted my girlfriend with a spinning hug. She got motion sickness and threw up all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 311

You deserved it 8 865

Tasty

By Anonymous - 22/05/2020 20:00

Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 788

You deserved it 297

Grossed out

By Anonymous - 10/11/2018 14:00

Today, I was helping this girl to the nurse’s office because she was so sick that she could barely walk. About halfway there, she stopped and vomited on me. My jaw was dropped in shock when she threw up on me again. A little went into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 801

You deserved it 350

By Anonymous - 23/04/2012 09:51 - United States

Today, due to nervousness, I threw up while proposing to my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 258

You deserved it 3 801

Next

Top comments

csigabajnok 0

Thursday 5 February 2009 15:15

tic tac is your friend

O_0 0

Thursday 5 February 2009 11:20

That sucks my friend...maybe she just had a stomic bug.....

Comments

ben2002_fml 0

Monday 30 March 2009 1:53

ouch...hahaha

xMooMoox 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 19:42

#15 Thats crazy, I would be grossed out that she vomited and embarrassed if I vomited. Also some people throw up when they are nervous (luckily I just laugh like a loony) so maybe she was really happy but scared. Unless she was like "GROSS!" and then vomited you really don't know until you ask.

louken83 0

Friday 10 April 2009 7:12

#16, I immediately thought of South Park also.

derailed 1

Thursday 30 April 2009 0:20

Shoulda rubbed her nose in it and told her she was bad.

24788 6

Sunday 3 May 2009 9:07

she might of been nervous.

easylazy 0

Sunday 24 May 2009 17:28

eeeeeeeeeeeeeew! in your mouth?!?!?!

EpicFail_fml 0

Sunday 25 October 2009 1:26

Ouch Dude that really sucks. #23 you're a ditz. Like really? #21 you're amazing. #s 16&20 Me too. #4if no one lied this site wouldn't be half as popular.

shabanana9 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 22:12

Ouch. That kind of sucks. Yet it's so funny at the same time.. Haha. Sorry, man.

rsvpdx97 2

Wednesday 3 June 2009 7:27

She might of had a virus

Alexgoesfml 3

Sunday 7 June 2009 18:37

She might have been nervous. Or did you stick her tongue so far down her throat to cause a gag reflex.

French21 0

Tuesday 9 June 2009 11:45

Awww I'm sorry! That sucks. I did that to my guy friend when I was drunk once but made it to the bathroom so he didn't see. I wasn't grossed out I was just sick from drinking. Maybe this is the case with her?

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The Top

Today, I was jogging in the neighborhood. My new neighbor who lives three houses down clotheslines me and shouts, "You're the reason my wife won't have sex with me!" He then kicked me in the stomach and walked inside. Now I'm scared to leave my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 664

You deserved it 3 777

Today, I learned the meaning behind the phrase, "Love you long time". It's from the movie Full Metal Jacket, when a hooker comes in and says, "Me so horny, me love you long time." I've been saying this to my parents and people at school, having no idea what it really means for over 2 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 784

You deserved it 22 714

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 527

You deserved it 247

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I agree, your life sucks 2 880

You deserved it 164

Today, I burst into tears when my 35 year-old cousin announced on social media she is going to be a grandma. Her 16 year-old son's girlfriend is pregnant. I am 33, single, and have been romantically invisible to everyone my whole life. I'm gonna die alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 093

You deserved it 247

Today, I drove home to Las Vegas after being in quarantine in Los Angeles for two weeks. The lights were on and the lock was busted. My apartment is completely ransacked. Yay 2021. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 020

You deserved it 112

Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend. I texted her and I would never talk to her again, but I accidentally sent it to my other best friend, who responded, "I'm so sorry, I never meant for you to find out." My two best friends cheated with my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 368

You deserved it 4 770

Today, I got my new work schedule. I really need the hours. The boss says he can't give me more because the economy is bad. However, he did find enough hours to hire his son last week. This week? Most of my hours were erased and given to the new employee; his daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 449

You deserved it 2 287