Love: Today, I kissed the girl I love for the first time. Her reaction?...

By alf - 27/10/2008 02:34 - France

Today, I kissed the girl I love for the first time. Her reaction? She vomited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 889

You deserved it 7 259

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/08/2010 20:20 - United States

Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 922

You deserved it 6 674

By shitfaced - 18/09/2015 17:30 - Netherlands - Sassenheim

Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 676

You deserved it 9 516

Poor me

By Anonymous - 10/11/2019 03:00

Today, I finally kissed the guy I really love at a party. He took me outside and immediately vomited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 014

You deserved it 242

Magic moments

By youmakemesick - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of four years. Her response? First, she threw up all over me, then she started crying hysterically. I'll take that as a no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 013

You deserved it 2 833

By notsober - 20/03/2012 05:49 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. About 2 hours later, he got to hold my hair while I puked, also for the first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 056

You deserved it 6 947

By jimbop - 23/05/2009 17:48 - Canada

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my girlfriend after a night of heavy drinking. She rolled towards me, looked me in the eyes and sweetly said, "I love you". Her morning breath was so bad that I had to jump up and rush to the bathroom to vomit, leaving a trail along the way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 921

You deserved it 10 325

By hamboneghost - 24/02/2015 19:02 - Canada - New Westminster

Today, I greeted my girlfriend with a spinning hug. She got motion sickness and threw up all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 311

You deserved it 8 865

Tasty

By Anonymous - 22/05/2020 20:00

Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 788

You deserved it 297

Grossed out

By Anonymous - 10/11/2018 14:00

Today, I was helping this girl to the nurse’s office because she was so sick that she could barely walk. About halfway there, she stopped and vomited on me. My jaw was dropped in shock when she threw up on me again. A little went into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 801

You deserved it 350

By Anonymous - 23/04/2012 09:51 - United States

Today, due to nervousness, I threw up while proposing to my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 258

You deserved it 3 801

csigabajnok 0

Thursday 5 February 2009 15:15

tic tac is your friend

O_0 0

Thursday 5 February 2009 11:20

That sucks my friend...maybe she just had a stomic bug.....

Comments

TheButler 0

Wednesday 4 November 2009 17:41

Wat woulda been jokes is if she puked in ure mouth xDxDxD soz :(

loveyahun 0

Thursday 19 November 2009 5:39

Maybe she was sick? -.-

Felixy 0

Sunday 6 December 2009 3:39

#6 ur so disgusting. lol But that would rlly suck...tic tac is your friend :)

PrincessAlyXOXO 0

Wednesday 9 December 2009 21:43

#10...... Wtf? No one cares about you and your 'amazing girl'... God.

pawpaw1995 0

Wednesday 17 March 2010 8:41

aww...did you have a bad experience??...seriously you are a jerk...

theboss747 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 4:40

tough break q

tedwin223 0

Tuesday 23 February 2010 4:51

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

azn365 0

Saturday 13 March 2010 18:08

Moral lesson: mints mouthwash! 

Krista19 1

Sunday 21 March 2010 7:57

OUCH!

Posiedeon 0

Saturday 17 April 2010 20:56

Is there any chance that she recently had some bad shrimp? XD

wethekings7 0

Thursday 22 April 2010 18:33

oooh...that's cold. You better lay off the garlic and onions next time.:P

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Love Embarrassing Miscellaneous Romantic Christmas Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Ironic Argument Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism Cars You're fired Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, my thieving, layabout stepmom planted weed in my bedroom and showed my dad. Well, maybe I'm jumping to conclusions here, but her smirk and telling me later that I shouldn't fuck with her again seems conclusive to me. Goodbye freedom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 127

You deserved it 3 083

Today, my wife waited until we’d been married for two weeks to tell me she has a mountain of credit card debt that she’s been hiding from me. This explains why she insisted the mortgage and car be in my name, her credit score is so low that it’s almost a double digit FML

I agree, your life sucks 526

You deserved it 145

The Top

Today, a booklet came in the mail, addressed to me and titled "How To Train Your Wife". I didn't order it but my wife doesn't believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 098

You deserved it 2 575

Today, at work, I wet my pants. I had to throw my tighty-whities away. Since I didn't have underwear on, I chafed real bad and got a rash on my butthole and near my balls. I had to push my boyfriend off of me, all because it hurt too much to touch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 183

You deserved it 530

Today, on my way to work, the obese old guy in the house opposite mine offered me tips on my yoga technique. Not only were his tips helpful, but I now know I should either close my curtains or put clothes on when I do yoga. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 087

You deserved it 39 696

Today, my son walked in on me masturbating. Now, whenever I don't do whatever he wants, he blackmails me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 290

You deserved it 2 143

Today, my uncle is posting on Facebook for clout about how his mom died of COVID. She actually died of sepsis from severe Alzheimer's. He was at the hospice meeting, and his wife and daughter held her hand when she passed. She also died two years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 857

You deserved it 93

Today, I got my first period. My dad bought me a card and had everyone in my family sign it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 700

You deserved it 4 780