Love: Today, I kissed the girl I love for the first time. Her reaction?... - FML

By alf - 27/10/2008 02:34 - France

Today, I kissed the girl I love for the first time. Her reaction? She vomited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 889

You deserved it 7 259

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/08/2010 20:20 - United States

Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 922

You deserved it 6 674

By shitfaced - 18/09/2015 17:30 - Netherlands - Sassenheim

Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 676

You deserved it 9 516

Poor me

By Anonymous - 10/11/2019 03:00

Today, I finally kissed the guy I really love at a party. He took me outside and immediately vomited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 014

You deserved it 242

Magic moments

By youmakemesick - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of four years. Her response? First, she threw up all over me, then she started crying hysterically. I'll take that as a no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 013

You deserved it 2 833

By notsober - 20/03/2012 05:49 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. About 2 hours later, he got to hold my hair while I puked, also for the first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 056

You deserved it 6 947

By jimbop - 23/05/2009 17:48 - Canada

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my girlfriend after a night of heavy drinking. She rolled towards me, looked me in the eyes and sweetly said, "I love you". Her morning breath was so bad that I had to jump up and rush to the bathroom to vomit, leaving a trail along the way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 921

You deserved it 10 325

By hamboneghost - 24/02/2015 19:02 - Canada - New Westminster

Today, I greeted my girlfriend with a spinning hug. She got motion sickness and threw up all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 311

You deserved it 8 865

Tasty

By Anonymous - 22/05/2020 20:00

Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 788

You deserved it 297

Grossed out

By Anonymous - 10/11/2018 14:00

Today, I was helping this girl to the nurse’s office because she was so sick that she could barely walk. About halfway there, she stopped and vomited on me. My jaw was dropped in shock when she threw up on me again. A little went into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 801

You deserved it 350

By Anonymous - 23/04/2012 09:51 - United States

Today, due to nervousness, I threw up while proposing to my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 258

You deserved it 3 801

Next

Top comments

csigabajnok 0

Thursday 5 February 2009 15:15

tic tac is your friend

O_0 0

Thursday 5 February 2009 11:20

That sucks my friend...maybe she just had a stomic bug.....

Comments

girlnamedkris 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 10:14

Aaahhh can you say...south park?? Haha fyl though fosho

easylazy 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 1:47

hahaha you are probably so ugly you need to get a girl dead drunk before shell go near year your life is totally ******!!!

kristenlovex3 0

Friday 19 August 2011 9:36

coming from the person with a monkey as their picture.

Ixnay_ 0

Friday 17 July 2009 11:41

:D Well there are these things called chewing gums!!! Or maby your tongue is ****** up :D

KellykopterXD 0

Tuesday 28 July 2009 22:45

same thing kinda happened with me and my current bf. It was before we went out, and he'd been kissing me for about 2 weeks and i hadnt kissed him back, well, the one day i did, we celebrated by making out for the rest of the night, the minute i got home I had the worst sickness bug ever. And I gave it to him. Poor dude XD

mb23509 0

Friday 31 July 2009 20:20

maybe next time you could use some mouth wash???

tangerine_12 0

Friday 7 August 2009 3:41

ahaaha oohh! burrnn!!

Zubat_fml 0

Wednesday 19 August 2009 16:17

That happened to me before. But she was drunk, so I didn't take it to offense.

pulpfiction_fml 3

Thursday 20 August 2009 4:43

Don't make love to drunken ******!

xyph 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 22:18

Toothbrush?

Ruin11thHour 0

Monday 19 October 2009 5:44

Bad breath? Mints anyone?

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Keywords

Love Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Romantic Christmas Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Bosses Capitalism Work Cars You're fired Covid Health Cheating Jealousy Kids Parenting

The Top

Today, while sitting at my desk at work, a co-worker asked for my help. It was only after I had walked over to his desk, bent over, answered his question, and walked back to my stall, that I felt a breeze. My tube top had slid down across my breasts, revealing my bra to the entire office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 870

You deserved it 43 620

Today, I found out that my boyfriend lost a bunch of money by buying some scam cryto crap linked to that "Hawk tuah" girl. Easiest break-up ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 483

You deserved it 117

The Top

Today, I have discovered that my daughter is struggling with anorexia. When I sat down to talk with her about it, she said it’s because, "all the other kids at school keep calling her fat." She was underweight before, and has now gone to being severely underweight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 264

You deserved it 121

Today, it’s been a year since my brother-in-law started sleeping on our sofa. At first I had sympathy, but he hasn’t even been looking for a job, so when I found him wearing my robe, drinking my sherry, in my armchair, I evicted his ass. Now I’m the one sleeping on the sofa because my wife is mad at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 275

You deserved it 141

Today, I went to see a movie. While buying tickets, the girl behind the counter asked to show my ID card to proof I'm at least 16 years old. Not wanting to make a drama, I showed it. She took a look at it and declared it as fake. That ID is real and I'm 24. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 035

You deserved it 3 341

Today, I was Skyping with a guy I'm really into. I'm not supposed to Skype at night, so when I heard my mum coming, I minimized the window. She walked in before I could mute my mic and started bitching me out for flushing my tampons down the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 454

You deserved it 26 072

Today, my husband is so desperate to not spend time with my parents that on my dad's birthday he claimed he forgot and booked a trip to the dentist, and now for their anniversary he's pulled the same trick again and booked this year's prostate exam. FML

I agree, your life sucks 943

You deserved it 268

Today, while shopping for a birthday present for my size 0 friend, I picked out a pair of pants for her. When paying, the cashier looked me up and down and said, "Well, you're pretty optimistic aren't you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 684

You deserved it 4 278