Health: Today, I learned a few things. One: friends are assholes. Two:...

By Myballshurt - 03/08/2013 04:31 - United States - Harrisburg

Today, I learned a few things. One: friends are assholes. Two: under no circumstance do you close your eyes when they ask you to. Three: getting kicked in the balls hurts a lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 438

You deserved it 22 129

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Same thing different taste

Battery

By Anonymous - 11/05/2020 05:00

Today, at work, I was talking to a colleague about what the worst pain he ever experienced was. He said his was being bitten by a dog, and I said I didn't know. Next thing, I was kicked in the balls from a behind by another work colleague. She said, "What about that?" I agreed, it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 721

You deserved it 225

By whoslade - 28/06/2012 17:36 - United States

Today, I woke up to a punch in the balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 921

You deserved it 4 590

By Anonymous - 08/01/2011 07:56 - United States

Today, on the way to work, I was punched in the balls by a complete stranger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 083

You deserved it 4 265

By love4cheese1197 - 02/08/2019 20:00

Today, I had to listen to my best friend explain how to properly unstick one's balls from one's leg. I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 437

You deserved it 245

Right in the nuts

By Anonymous - 01/06/2021 06:01

Today, I thought it would be fun and nice to pick my little brother up, but no, he accidentally kicked me in the balls. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 723

You deserved it 244

Fight like hell

By Glass Joe - 23/05/2022 22:00 - United States - Staten Island

Today, I learned that kicking an armed mugger's ass is something that only happens in movies, and that brass knuckles are really fucking painful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 818

You deserved it 285

By Annoymous - 03/09/2009 10:19 - Australia

Today, walking home from work, I saw a little boy crying, so I crouched down to his eye level. I asked him what was wrong, his reply was to kick me in the groin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 496

You deserved it 5 810

By Ballshurt - 07/09/2009 04:57 - United States

Today, I learned that you can pierce your balls. However, sitting on a thumbtack is not the best way to find this out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 527

You deserved it 7 040

By Anonymous - 31/12/2015 21:26 - New Zealand

Today, I found out how it feels to have a car door slammed shut on my hand, breaking two of my fingers. Hint: it's fucking painful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 171

You deserved it 2 039

Pissed

By TJ. - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - India

Today, my friend whacked me in the family jewels while I was washing my hands in our college bathroom. While I lay writhing in pain on the floor, a guy at the urinal turned around towards me to see what was wrong. He was still peeing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 671

You deserved it 3 079

Wizardo 33

Saturday 3 August 2013 15:44

1. You're gullible as hell 2. Never trust any of your guy friends - guys are assholes 3. Ice them balls brother.

olpally 32

Saturday 3 August 2013 15:45

After you're done being in pain, kick them in the balls. Bastards.

Comments

phoneYuNOlisten 16

Saturday 3 August 2013 19:40

Get revenge OP. Trust me, I know the feels.

termin8tor786 10

Saturday 3 August 2013 22:27

Dumbass!!!

Obey_StudBoii 23

Saturday 3 August 2013 22:49

Ice them boys together and pray you can still reproduce.

TheModernPatriot 14

Sunday 4 August 2013 0:16

I have a friend who likes to play those games. He started to try and cup check me once at work like he did the managers, I told him if he ever did that I'd break his arm when I was done hurting. Hasn't tried since.

HunterMark 14

Sunday 4 August 2013 0:34

Your are a very lonely person.

HunterMark 14

Sunday 4 August 2013 0:37

Seems like you are a very lonely person, with self assumed friends.

SasquatchDeluxe 10

Sunday 4 August 2013 0:43

Four: you need new friends with an intelligence lever above seventh grade.

Shadowbay 18

Sunday 4 August 2013 1:33

One of my cousins used to kick the guys in the family while rough housing but when he tried to get my brother he soon stopped that... Looks like it's time for you to teach your friends the same lesson :)