Miscellaneous: Today, I learned that when you put duct tape over your mouth...

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By ow - 17/01/2010 05:25 - United States

Today, I learned that when you put duct tape over your mouth because you are bored, it really hurts taking it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 251

You deserved it 69 799

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Same thing different taste

By monkeycannon7 - 24/04/2012 16:36 - United States - Woodbridge

Today, I learned the hard way not to take off your shirt with a toothpick in your mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 349

You deserved it 29 710

By farhia97 - 08/11/2011 02:14 - United States

Today, I learned how much it hurts to put a mint up your nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 233

You deserved it 54 816

By ouch - 03/01/2011 00:36 - United States

Today, I took a nap on the couch in the family room. My brother thought it would be hilarious to take clear packaging tape and put it on my chapped lips. Then rip it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 641

You deserved it 2 992

By Millian2 - 08/04/2012 02:10 - United States - Plymouth

Today, I learned that when you take off your sweatshirt, it can get stuck in your braces. I was in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 035

You deserved it 3 714

Plug me in

By Plugged - 04/03/2025 08:00 - United States

Today, I found out that when you put Kleenex up your nose to stop it from constantly draining snot, it is possible for it to rip and get stuck in your nose when you try to take it out. Words cannot describe how incredibly uncomfortable that was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 256

You deserved it 278

How many cans did I have last night?

By Anonymous - 12/02/2025 19:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, as I peeled a now soggy Band-Aid off my finger, I discovered that in the dim light of yesterday evening, I had, with great anxiety, wrapped it around the wrong finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 123

You deserved it 418

By Staples - 15/05/2010 06:21 - United Kingdom

Today, I accidentally stapled my finger to a piece of paper. It hurt, but I took it out and went to restaple it. I did it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 275

You deserved it 49 097

DIY

By liver - 19/03/2012 00:51 - United States - Santa Cruz

Today, since I'm too broke to get a new one, I had to duct tape my bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 893

You deserved it 3 600

By anthony512 - 24/05/2013 16:08 - Netherlands - Amsterdam

Today, after a sleepless night, I fell asleep at my work desk. When I awoke, I found my co-workers had duct taped me to my chair. I was yelling at them to untape me, when our boss came in, scolded me for fucking about on the job, and left without saying a word to my colleagues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 036

You deserved it 12 769

By Anonymous - 11/01/2011 06:38 - United States

Today, I discovered that just because I got my braces removed does not mean my painful mouth ulcers will stop. I now have them under my tongue. I can't even lick my lips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 387

You deserved it 2 649

mikeyforge 0

Sunday 17 January 2010 12:13

OH NO! WHO KNEW TAKING OFF DUCK TAPE HURTS!!!

armada_fml 0

Sunday 17 January 2010 12:15

I really hope you aren't over the age of 12.

Comments

aswan15 0

Saturday 18 June 2011 20:26

who doesn't know that?!!! wow! can we say dumb?!

flyboy30364 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 6:43

sad thing is... it really don't hurt... me and my friends tried everything stupid including this... your just a woose

luvsyaweirdos 0

Saturday 6 August 2011 8:48

I've totally done that. it hurts soooooo bad!!

jjluv456 11

Friday 19 August 2011 17:35

I've done that

Iheardthat 7

Wednesday 31 August 2011 5:58

Wow, and you didn't know this before because??

yankfan89 27

Wednesday 5 October 2011 3:06

Dumbass!

lolk3qt 1

Friday 7 October 2011 6:24

Try putting something else near your mouth like my penis

surferforlifezzz 1

Thursday 22 December 2011 18:10

****** idiot

Skyrim123 3

Sunday 19 February 2012 4:43

You don't say

FMLnoFMD 5

Friday 30 March 2012 6:09

It doesn't hurt that bad you are just a pussy

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The Top

Today, I was in an elevator with my girlfriend when it suddenly stopped. Thinking of being spontaneous like in all the movies, I propped her up on the railings and started getting passionate. That's when the emergency phone rang. And I discovered there was a security camera. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 335

You deserved it 41 054

Today, my girlfriend wanted to role-play non-consensual sex. I was already uncomfortable with the idea, and when she started begging, "No, no" as I stripped her, I dropped the role-play and walked out. Now she's pissed at me. I'm sorry, but this is fucking creepy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 93

The Top

Today, I got a 25-cent raise at work. That would be wonderful, had they not cut 6 hours off my schedule as well. I'm now making $200 less a month than I was pre-raise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 913

You deserved it 104

Today, after months of talking to this guy on Instagram and convinced this was a sure thing, he wanted proof I was real and not catfishing him. I sent him a picture of me holding a paper with his username. He replied, “Sorry, I didn’t know you were a big girl. I need a healthy girl who takes care of herself.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 983

You deserved it 400

Today, I failed my driving test, and didn't get my great new job that a buddy helped me get. He got fired, and they won't hire me because he recommended me, regardless of how qualified for the job and how great the interview went. He called to tell me an hour before my driving test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 779

You deserved it 170

Today, at a party, my friend introduced me to her roommate by spouting the usual crap, like, “You guys just had to meet, you have so much in common.” After 20 minutes of very painful, awkward conversation, it was clear the only thing we had in common was being the only two black people in the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 561

You deserved it 105

Today, I was going to have sex with a girl, but when I got my dick out she said, "You got a nice winky." Who the fuck calls a dick a winky unless they're in kindergarten? Felt like I brought home a toddler. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63

You deserved it 39

Today, I got pulled over for speeding. After the cop asked for my license, he started laughing when he saw my picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 515

You deserved it 245

Same thing different taste

Plug me in

How many cans did I have last night?

DIY

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