Miscellaneous: Today, I learned that when you put duct tape over your mouth...

By ow - 17/01/2010 05:25 - United States

Today, I learned that when you put duct tape over your mouth because you are bored, it really hurts taking it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 251

You deserved it 69 794

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Same thing different taste

By monkeycannon7 - 24/04/2012 16:36 - United States - Woodbridge

Today, I learned the hard way not to take off your shirt with a toothpick in your mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 346

You deserved it 29 705

By farhia97 - 08/11/2011 02:14 - United States

Today, I learned how much it hurts to put a mint up your nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 232

You deserved it 54 811

By ouch - 03/01/2011 00:36 - United States

Today, I took a nap on the couch in the family room. My brother thought it would be hilarious to take clear packaging tape and put it on my chapped lips. Then rip it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 631

You deserved it 2 989

By Millian2 - 08/04/2012 02:10 - United States - Plymouth

Today, I learned that when you take off your sweatshirt, it can get stuck in your braces. I was in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 028

You deserved it 3 714

By Staples - 15/05/2010 06:21 - United Kingdom

Today, I accidentally stapled my finger to a piece of paper. It hurt, but I took it out and went to restaple it. I did it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 274

You deserved it 49 090

DIY

By liver - 19/03/2012 00:51 - United States - Santa Cruz

Today, since I'm too broke to get a new one, I had to duct tape my bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 891

You deserved it 3 598

By anthony512 - 24/05/2013 16:08 - Netherlands - Amsterdam

Today, after a sleepless night, I fell asleep at my work desk. When I awoke, I found my co-workers had duct taped me to my chair. I was yelling at them to untape me, when our boss came in, scolded me for fucking about on the job, and left without saying a word to my colleagues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 034

You deserved it 12 766

By Anonymous - 11/01/2011 06:38 - United States

Today, I discovered that just because I got my braces removed does not mean my painful mouth ulcers will stop. I now have them under my tongue. I can't even lick my lips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 378

You deserved it 2 648

By bloodyLIP - 14/05/2011 19:06 - United States

Today, I learned the hard way that an ice cube is capable of ripping the skin off your bottom lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 285

You deserved it 14 173

But… why?

By Fmylife - 06/07/2011 09:17 - United States

Today, I have a cold. Trying to clear out my stuffy nose, I tried putting mouthwash in my nose. Thinking it was an awesome idea, I put some more in. I then starting screaming in pain due to the extreme burning in my nostrils. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 258

You deserved it 120 991

mikeyforge 0

Sunday 17 January 2010 12:13

OH NO! WHO KNEW TAKING OFF DUCK TAPE HURTS!!!

armada_fml 0

Sunday 17 January 2010 12:15

I really hope you aren't over the age of 12.

Comments

Sarcastic_Lady 0

Sunday 17 January 2010 20:31

"Today I learned that if you drive a nail into your own head with a hammer, it hurts really really bad. FML" Some things you just use your common sense about.

token_blackguy 18

Sunday 17 January 2010 20:45

Next I suggest sticking a fork or knife into a socket or touching the stove to see what hot feels likes.

davidhasmorefun 0

Sunday 17 January 2010 21:17

today I wasted 15 seconds of my life reading this stupid post. fml

LivingInSepia 0

Sunday 17 January 2010 21:22

Oh my God. How old are you, six? This is so freaking stupid.

hawkie409 0

Sunday 17 January 2010 21:29

that was dumb. and how would it ruin your day?

fspdavewayne 0

Sunday 17 January 2010 23:06

Wow. You're really that dumb, huh? Well thank you for the laugh.

jelly_7297 0

Sunday 17 January 2010 23:15

you are really retarded aren't you?

sherrybaby10 0

Sunday 17 January 2010 23:37

no shit sherlock

randomgirlm 0

Monday 18 January 2010 1:21

OP- there's a thing called common sense y don't u try 2 use it sometime dumbass

SweetPotatoVines 0

Monday 18 January 2010 1:43

How the **** did this shit get in? What the ****?

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend’s dad has a sword he inherited from his dad that he claims links their family to the old Swiss nobility. I work in a museum so I know most of the makers' marks on swords, so I’m not sure how to tell him his sword is a reproduction made in Spain less than 100 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 403

You deserved it 78

Today, my best friend called me to cancel our mall plans. I could hear that she was watching a movie in the background. I then called my boyfriend to see if he was busy, and I could hear the same movie in the background. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 310

You deserved it 157

The Top

Today, I was in a shop with my 9 month-old son. He was babbling gibberish as babies do, and repeatedly said what sounded like the N-word. We're white. FML

I agree, your life sucks 936

You deserved it 161

Today, I came home from work to find that my girlfriend had sold all of my N64 and Atari games and both the consoles and bought me a PS4 with the money. While I was standing there in shock, she kissed me on the cheek and said, "I know, I'm the greatest." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 825

You deserved it 4 727

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because apparently I need to "grow up". He's the one who excessively plays Call of Duty and still has Pokémon and Bionicles in his room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 973

You deserved it 22 565

Today, it's been 3 months since my dog scratched my 9 year old granddaughter after she walked over and repeatedly kicked him. My daughter has disowned me and won't let me see my own grandchildren until I have my companion of 11 years "destroyed". FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 353

You deserved it 2 921

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, she stopped moaning and told me to stop because she couldn't fake it anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 528

You deserved it 16 762

Today, my boyfriend refuses to do doggy style anymore because I, and I quote, "have a weird looking butthole, it’s not dirty or anything, it’s just the strangest butthole I’ve ever seen, it’s really distracting." So now, I’m not only self-conscious about my small boobs, but my ugly asshole too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 797

You deserved it 358

Same thing different taste

DIY

But… why?

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