Transportation: Today, I made the decision to quit smoking while I was driving... - FML

By Anonymous - 10/10/2009 21:43 - United States

Today, I made the decision to quit smoking while I was driving in my car. So I took my pack, crushed it and threw it out the window. I felt triumphant about this change I was making in my life, until the cop I didn't know was behind me gave me a ticket for littering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 988

You deserved it 46 117

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 22/01/2017 18:00

Today, I quit smoking cigarettes. While driving to work, the car in front of me flicked his out the window, flying straight into mine. It set the bottom of my seat on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 402

You deserved it 550

The smell of freedom

By ThatNewCarSmell - 01/10/2014 16:53 - United States - Carlsbad

Today, I held my bag of burger and fries out the window while driving, to preserve that new car smell. Not only did I hit a pothole and lose my lunch, I got pulled over by a cop who suspected I was either littering or tossing drugs when I saw him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 880

You deserved it 45 702

Anger management

By Manuel Gearbox - 12/07/2021 18:01 - South Africa - Cape Town

Today, I drove a different work vehicle, one with the cupholder right behind the gear lever. After multiple accidental attempts at changing gears with my Coke bottle, I threw it out the window in a temper. I then got busted for littering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 216

You deserved it 1 655

Chips

By Anonymous - 13/06/2009 04:09 - United States

Today, I was smoking in my car and flicked the butt… into the face of a cop on a motorcycle going the other way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 005

You deserved it 78 222

By Anonymous - 08/04/2011 15:30 - United States

Today, I finally found a reason to quit smoking. I threw my cigarette butt out the window and it blew back in, went down the back of my pants, and burnt my butt in 3 different places. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 926

You deserved it 54 304

By Anonymous - 06/12/2010 19:11 - United States

Today, I was smoking while driving. A cop pulled me over and asked if I knew what I did wrong. I thought he could smell the tobacco, so I decided to just admit it. As it turns out, I was going well over the speed limit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 317

You deserved it 39 804

Double down

By Dani_Rich - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was pulled over by a motorcycle cop for speeding in a 25 MPH zone. As the cop was walking towards my car, I flicked my cigarette butt out of my window. So, the cop did me the pleasure of writing me two tickets instead of one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 035

You deserved it 174 535

By Michelle - 26/04/2010 21:42 - New Zealand

Today, I decided to quit smoking. During my lunch break, I tried to ash the KitKat bar that was in my hand after I took a bite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 714

You deserved it 17 354

By Anonymous - 17/07/2012 13:54 - Greece - Athens

Today, I gave up smoking. A few hours later, I caught myself daydreaming about brutally killing a guy that gave me a mean look at the bus. Maybe I should go back to smoking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 301

You deserved it 5 724

By Criminal - 13/07/2010 23:15 - United States

Today, I got a speeding ticket. I wrote a check, and on the way to deposit my fine, I got another one. I put both fines in a box down town, and I turned around to see a cop putting a parking ticket under my wind-shield wiper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 940

You deserved it 49 374

Next

Top comments

guilty4associate 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 1:26

so? i don't see the big deal here. pay the fine, and next time, don't litter.

suckstobeyou3 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 1:28

Morals of the story- 1) Don't litter. 2) Don't smoke in the first place.

Comments

DeathcoreDashie 11

Saturday 6 September 2014 20:01

Look at the bright side: Now you won't have enough money to buy cigs!

mainlineloser 9

Tuesday 7 October 2014 22:52

Squidward in 10% of the show...

emmsies 16

Tuesday 11 November 2014 3:57

good job for quiting but you for littering

happysmile987 24

Sunday 7 December 2014 21:14

Way to go, OP. Now you just need to quit littering.

ThuNDeY 23

Friday 13 February 2015 18:26

Officer: are these your cigarettes? Op: No officer I already quit smoking.

baileydyannaaa 5

Sunday 6 March 2016 7:10

You're a dumb ****

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The Top

Today, I realized that I will never be able to buy the car I've wanted since middle school. The car? A greyish-silver Volvo, which is the make and color of car Kurt Cobain drove. The reason? I've been informed that it's also the make and color of the car that Edward Cullen drives in Twilight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 792

You deserved it 11 207

Today, I wrote a submission to FML and I realized that I could be doing so much more with my life than this. I mean really, I have real life stuff to deal with, and I don't have the time to be reading these s*itposts, much less making my own. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80

You deserved it 522

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 39 578

You deserved it 4 182

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I agree, your life sucks 12 380

You deserved it 1 095

Today, my son announced he wants to be a YouTuber, and wants to make videos of himself doing violent things to pregnant women. He’s 9. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 233

You deserved it 365

Today, I tried a new medicine in hopes that it would stop my stomach from constantly growling. Turns out, my body can either digest loudly, or not at all. I’ve been full for three days after one regular-sized meal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 860

You deserved it 109

Today, I got fired from my job as a babysitter because the movie I showed the kids was "too violent and gave them nightmares." What movie was it? Mary Poppins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 985

You deserved it 92

Today, I received a notice that I'm being fined for failure to renew my Florida license. I've lived in Maryland for the last seven years and I've never had a Florida license. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 982

You deserved it 175