Work: Today, I made the mistake of sneezing in front of a hyper religious...

By Anonymous - 08/04/2009 10:26 - United States

Today, I made the mistake of sneezing in front of a hyper religious customer, who for ten minutes blamed the incident of shifting weather patterns that signaled the return of Jesus, who was as she explained, upset about the abortion rates in America and President Obama. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 926

You deserved it 5 286

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Same thing different taste

By BlueMacaw - 25/07/2016 14:38 - United States - Edmond

Today, at church, I sneezed suddenly and messily into my hand just as the priest asked us to stand and greet our neighbors with a handshake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 669

You deserved it 2 163

Bless you

By Achoo - 31/01/2023 02:30

Today, I've been having really bad seasonal allergies. I was at work, and feeling just about to sneeze for at least a full minute, but thought I could stop it. A customer came up to me, I opened my mouth to greet her… but instead sneezed right in her face. Several seconds before my addled brain caught up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 708

You deserved it 187

By sonofawackjob - 18/08/2017 17:15 - United States - Syracuse

Today, my raving lunatic mother screamed at me for being "disrespectful", threatened to not pay for my college, swore at me, and accused me of having multiple personality disorder, all in rapid succession. This was provoked by me sneezing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 626

You deserved it 263

Trigger warning

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my annoying colleague gasped, wrapped her arms around herself, started sweating, and curled up in a ball crying, "No, no, no" in front of several customers. They accused me of "setting her off", when I blurted out, "Sorry, she gets panic attacks." All I did was say the word "abortion." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 328

You deserved it 6 594

By SierraDiaz2097 - 23/03/2013 05:44 - United States - Vardaman

Today, I sneezed. My boyfriend told me to shut up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 621

You deserved it 9 662

By Anonymous - 07/02/2012 12:04 - United States

Today, I sneezed after watching a commercial involving dust. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 208

You deserved it 6 903

By 911 - 13/11/2008 03:57 - France

Today, my boss sneezed onto his hands and then licked them in front of my best customers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 237

You deserved it 2 336

Covidiots

By Anonymous - 05/12/2020 19:08 - United Kingdom - Milton Keynes

Today, I had to abandon my shopping after a Covidiot directly sneezed all over it. He took his mask off because he was about to sneeze. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 144

You deserved it 242

By Anonymous - 02/09/2009 17:38 - United States

Today, I decided to lay out topless in my fenced-in backyard. For about an hour, everything was going great until I sneezed and my creepy, middle-aged neighbor said "bless you". From my bushes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 178

You deserved it 17 630

By race - 18/11/2010 08:37 - Australia

Today, I was in a meeting and someone behind me sneezed really loudly. As they were doing so, I felt something cold land on my neck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 664

You deserved it 2 679

Xarin 0

Wednesday 8 April 2009 20:18

Y'know, I'm Christian, and I love Jesus, and all that... But I just can't stand people like that...ugh

perfectwinds 0

Wednesday 8 April 2009 20:15

Haha I love hyper religious customers. When one found out I was pregnant she literally reached across the desk, grabbed my head, and said "GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR BABY!" really loud. I couldn't stop laughing after she left.

Comments

Coban3 0

Wednesday 8 April 2009 23:07

wow i hate people like that

FreedomFirst 0

Wednesday 8 April 2009 23:17

Yeah, I know a couple of people like that. They're really annoying.

Nakedsquirrel 5

Wednesday 8 April 2009 23:20

...wh-... ...what the ****?

piderman13 0

Wednesday 8 April 2009 23:26

THANK YOU JAAASUS!!! O LORD RELEASE THE DEMON FROM INSIDE OF YOUR DAUGHTA AND CLEANSE HER. THANK YOU JAAASUS!!! DO NOT SEND US TO THE FIERY PITS OF HELL BUT HONOR OUR FOLLOWING AND BRING US TO HEAVEN!! (cartman in south park *do the crippled go to heaven*)

fueledbyamy 0

Wednesday 8 April 2009 23:27

these are the sort of people that make me feel ashamed to admit that im religious.

piderman13 0

Wednesday 8 April 2009 23:31

and yea #110 Its tough to admit your religious in any fashion, but if you do that later, after people can tell you're completely normal then it's fine hahaha

biolysis 0

Wednesday 8 April 2009 23:33

That customer is ridiculously awesome. I personally wouldn't go as far to say that you sneezing signals the coming of Jesus (after all, you could just be sick), but I definitely like the way she is thinking.