Love: Today, I met a cute guy for coffee. Everything was going fine,...

By Ltl_Dust_Bunny - 23/03/2009 07:36 - United States

Today, I met a cute guy for coffee. Everything was going fine, right up until he started telling me about his alien encounters and super psychic powers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 882

You deserved it 9 492

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Same thing different taste

MLM FML

By Maddi - 04/05/2016 02:55 - United States - Houston

Today, I went on a coffee date with a man I met online. His "friend" had tagged along. We were having a good conversation, until the friend pulls out his laptop and says, "So let me tell you a little bit about our travel business," and talked about a pyramid scheme for an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 931

You deserved it 1 381

By notnerb - 19/05/2009 10:13 - New Zealand

Today, I met up with a guy from a local dating site for coffee. He walked up, looked me over and said "Ummm, no", then walked off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 896

You deserved it 8 594

Smooth

By firstdategonebad - 12/10/2012 18:43 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I went on a coffee date with the man I've been in love with for a while. Before I knew what was going on, he'd started chatting up a pretty girl sitting nearby. I had to drink my coffee alone while he got her number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 965

You deserved it 2 589

Sounds like a keeper

By Rae - 30/03/2023 10:00

Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed really nice. However, halfway through the date, he started talking about how he was a flat-earther, and believed that the moon landing was faked. Oh, and that birds aren't real. I had to endure another hour of his conspiracy theories before I could finally escape. FML

I agree, your life sucks 825

You deserved it 141

By holyshitbatman - 09/11/2012 04:53 - United States - Toledo

Today, I started dating a seemingly normal guy. Not even four hours into our relationship, he began telling me that he can see spirits, dead people, and that I have a large black dog following me everywhere I go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 922

You deserved it 3 029

Get out of there, fast

By LeaveMeAlone - 23/02/2021 22:56

Today, I went on a date with a really cute guy. Things were going great, so we went to his place. While he was in the bathroom, I absentmindedly looked around his apartment. Unfortunately, his living room cupboard was half open, and I saw a shrine of pictures of me. Apparently, he's been stalking me for months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 731

You deserved it 131

Fake news

By sayno - 12/11/2010 11:06 - Switzerland

Today, I went to a coffee shop to meet an online date. I couldn't spot him, so he eventually came up and introduced himself. It seems his on-line picture must have been taken before I was born. I spluttered "This isn't going to work," and promptly scuttled out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 128

You deserved it 11 315

By blueglover - 27/03/2012 07:40 - United States - Perris

Today, I made a new friend. He seemed pretty cool, until we came to the topic of religion and the ancient alien theory. I'm seemingly now friends with a guy who thinks alien Jesus raped an Earth woman, and we're the resulting cross-breed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 959

You deserved it 3 705

By lamesauce - 15/02/2009 10:32 - Canada

Today, I went on a coffee date with a guy I'm interested in. He picked up his phone mid-date to finalize dinner plans with another girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 850

You deserved it 3 055

By nononame - 10/03/2009 04:20 - United States

Today, I emailed the guy I like to ask him on a coffee date. He responded, declining by telling me he never drinks coffee. We met at Starbucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 177

You deserved it 4 187

erm 0

Monday 23 March 2009 20:09

Whoa...You actually MET Tom Cruise?

cchamp27 0

Monday 23 March 2009 20:08

And how is your life f*cked as a result of this?

Comments

ohdamn_fml 2

Monday 23 March 2009 20:33

With a name like "Ltl_dust_bunny" I don't feel you have room to judge

Kassad_fml 0

Monday 23 March 2009 20:35

#6 what the f... now I have never heard that before

zoecakes 0

Monday 23 March 2009 20:40

#3 aahahahahhahah. he's just not that into you. fyl.

shalvius 3

Monday 23 March 2009 20:43

so what's wrong with Aliens?

BeastAthlete 0

Monday 23 March 2009 20:43

haha #3

SK25Reboo 0

Friday 11 June 2010 7:22

#27-they're illegal?

meetmeinhell 0

Monday 23 March 2009 20:43

hey that was me =(

omg_18 0

Monday 23 March 2009 20:50

lmfao #3 and 6. hilarious. yeah, sucks to be you but you'll get over it. not really a fyl.

efftthhiiss 0

Monday 23 March 2009 20:57

thats more of a **** his life than a **** yours. unless he just realized he wasn't into you and intentionally scared you off.

Gameboy 0

Monday 23 March 2009 21:09

AH! This is not an FML. If he was serious, than LMAO. What a keeper!

Cheyyyy 0

Monday 23 March 2009 21:14

I literally LOL'd

Keywords

Awkward Love Friends Haircut Cute Miscellaneous Relatable Work Cars You're fired Kids Parenting Family DIY Cats Am I overreacting? Intimacy Sex Poopoo peepee Management Frustration Capitalism Coworkers Transportation Animals ADHD Dogs Dating Technology Mental health

The Top

Today, my thieving, layabout stepmom planted weed in my bedroom and showed my dad. Well, maybe I'm jumping to conclusions here, but her smirk and telling me later that I shouldn't fuck with her again seems conclusive to me. Goodbye freedom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 127

You deserved it 3 083

Today, I couldn't sleep because I had the worst time positioning myself around my cat who was sleeping in my bed. I couldn't kick my cat out of bed because I earlier today had an argument with my brother over which of us the cat loved more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 003

You deserved it 42 708

The Top

Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his friends as his "sex partner." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 820

You deserved it 3 403

Today, my mom told me I was a bad daughter because I didn't get anything for my parents' anniversary. I just sent my brother a check for $400 for my share of their gift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 334

You deserved it 3 090

Today, I was babysitting a kid for the first time. She asked if she could watch a movie, so I downloaded Cinderella for her. An hour later, this 10-year-old girl was lecturing me about unrealistic standards of beauty and abusive relationships, and how I suck for liking the movie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 070

You deserved it 8 774

Today, I was awarding medals to finalists in a school club. While putting one around someone's neck, I ended up poking a girl in the eye. She tried to be a trooper by continuing to walk across stage, but I guess her eyes got really watery because she missed the step and fell, breaking her ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 294

You deserved it 8 029

Today, my friend was showing me pictures of her and her family. I told her to stop at one of the pictures. I started laughing my back off and said that she looked grotesque. She asked me if I was serious, I swore that I was. It was actually a picture of her sister, who died 1 year ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 425

You deserved it 52 323

Today, my new neighbour is totally a Karen, she has the sunglasses, the haircut and the outfits we all know so well, plus I can hear how she speaks to her husband and kids through the wall. I’m afraid to leave my house in case she introduces herself and immediately finds something to moan about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 691

You deserved it 717

Same thing different taste

MLM FML

Smooth

Sounds like a keeper

Get out of there, fast

Fake news

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