Animals: Today, I put my 5 month-old daughter in her swinging chair and...

By lolmyfduplife - 24/12/2015 06:10

Today, I put my 5 month-old daughter in her swinging chair and walked into the kitchen to make her a bottle. When I came back, she was giggling because the dog was licking her face. It would have been cute, picture worthy even, if I actually had a dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 699

You deserved it 2 097

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Same thing different taste

By gross - 06/08/2015 17:28 - United States

Today, I asked my one-year-old to come and give mommy a kiss. She did and it was really sweet, until she tried to spit a piece of dog food into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 825

You deserved it 3 173

Googoo gaga

By Daisie - 24/01/2025 00:00 - United States - Santa Fe

Today, I spent way too long baby-talking my neighbor’s dog through the fence, calling him "the cutest, sweetest baby." It turned out that my neighbor was sitting on the other side of the fence the entire time, out of view, quietly giggling at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 181

You deserved it 387

By Mom2grls808 - 19/12/2018 20:00 - United States

Today, I was taking a nap with my 5 month-old on the (carpeted) floor in the living room. When I woke up, my daughter had bombed her diaper, and her and the dogs were rolling in it on the carpet and tiled kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 193

You deserved it 519

By Water Daughter - 13/10/2013 05:51 - United States

Today, I figured out my 1-year-old daughter likes to dip her hand in our dogs' water bowl, and rub the water on her face. So I put the water bowl out of reach. She then figured out how to open the bathroom door and use the toilet instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 571

You deserved it 4 580

Catch!

By babybreath - 03/06/2009 02:08 - United States

Today, I was babysitting my baby cousin. I was lying on my back playing with her, while holding her up in the air. As I was doing that, I made cooing noises and funny faces to get her to laugh. She laughed and threw up in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 107

You deserved it 10 196

By Jack00412 - 08/07/2014 19:55 - United States - Montague

Today, I walked outside to find my 3 year-old daughter and her pet fish playing together on the swings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 308

You deserved it 5 538

By Anonymous - 27/01/2016 19:43 - United States

Today, I was sitting in the living room with my husband when we heard a baby coo. This would have been adorable, if we had a baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 768

You deserved it 1 478

By Anonymous - 27/10/2013 16:33 - United States - Tulsa

Today, I enjoyed a romantic evening at home with my husband while a babysitter took care of my 5-year-old daughter. After she came home, she told me the sitter let her use her "weird swing." I wasn't too worried, until she said it was indoors, and I realized she was describing a sex swing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 791

You deserved it 4 462

Baby fever

By SkeetinKeaton - 06/05/2013 06:29 - United States

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 404

You deserved it 6 565

By Momo8612 - 21/04/2017 12:00

Today, while shopping for groceries, a small child pointed at my face and exclaimed : "DOGGIE!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 689

You deserved it 306

aabhasj 20

Thursday 24 December 2015 12:11

dog turned out to be friendly so its still kinda cute even though its not ur dog.

FlamingColor 30

Thursday 24 December 2015 11:51

At least the dog was friendly and in the holiday sprit! :D

Comments

fpants2010 18

Thursday 24 December 2015 14:26

Who's dog was it? At least it was gentle with your baby!

heavenlyassbutt 11

Thursday 24 December 2015 14:42

If it's a stray give him/her a home. it's obvious they love your baby you can't ask for better.

CosmicElk 26

Thursday 24 December 2015 14:50

Keep it if its a stray :D

Alexandria79 22

Thursday 24 December 2015 15:00

I don't get it. real dog? imaginary dog? ghost dog? I'm confused

sk8erd 15

Thursday 7 January 2016 21:54

I actually thought ghost dog. I don't know why people thumbed you down. I'm asking myself the same question.

LPac5295 27

Thursday 24 December 2015 15:05

It's your Christmas gift OP! No but seriously that's really weird. What kind of dog was it? lol

CaroLouWho 10

Thursday 24 December 2015 16:08

I wish a dog would come into my house and make itself at home. Then my folks would have to keep it.

MrSassypants 33

Thursday 24 December 2015 17:17

I kept a stray cat in my house for a while without my mom noticing. Once she found out she then wanted it out so I put it in our backyard and now it lives in the backyard and I still feed it and play with it and bring the cat in the house sometimes. It's surprisingly pretty easy to keep a secret like that.

skyeyez9 24

Thursday 24 December 2015 17:20

I was at my cousins house for the first time, and an australian shepherd walked up to her front door, scratching it to be let inside. I opened the door to let her in, and commented how she has a cute dog.....she told me she doesnt have a dog. It was the neighbors dog, who have young kids. The dog goes to her house for peace and quiet, and even has a worn trail where she walks from her house to my cousin's.

gracehi 31

Thursday 24 December 2015 19:57

That's so funny! Poor dog just wants to take a nap. It's nice of your cousin to accommodate him. We all need the kindness of a stranger from time to time, animal and human alike.