Miscellaneous: Today, I spent the whole day seeing how many licks it would take...

By Tootsy_Roll_Pop - 23/05/2009 16:15 - United States

Today, I spent the whole day seeing how many licks it would take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop: 763. I'm 24. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 257

You deserved it 23 275

November 11: Memories and smiles
Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

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Same thing different taste

By htothecr - 03/05/2009 21:05 - United States

Today, I was holding a lit cigarette in one hand and a lollipop in the other. Guess which one I licked? FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 205

You deserved it 141 024

By mk - 20/06/2009 05:47 - Canada

Today, I had a big craving for a popsicle so I went to a convenience store and bought one. On my first bite, my upper lip got stuck to it. I ripped it off and spent the next 10 minutes trying to stop the bleeding from the giant cut I'd put in my lip. It hurt too much to finish the popsicle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 421

You deserved it 13 434

By doesntkissalot - 28/08/2010 16:19 - United States

Today, I was watching TV when a Dentyne gum commercial came on and stated that the average person spends more than 20,000 minutes kissing. I've spent less than three. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 332

You deserved it 6 080

By ouch - 05/10/2015 19:20 - United States - Stockton

Today, I cracked my tooth. I was so tired I put my pretzel stick in my tea and took a bite out of my spoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 876

You deserved it 3 769

By Snotmyfault - 11/01/2009 14:33 - United States

Today, at the age of 22, I started eating my boogers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 571

You deserved it 49 374

By SonofMnemosyne - 19/11/2018 07:30 - United States

Today, I have been on the toilet all day due to chocolate laxatives from trick-or-treating. Today, it is my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 534

You deserved it 315

By Wraith - 06/11/2013 17:27 - Canada - Holland Landing

Today, because I'm tall enough to see over the cubicle walls at work, I witnessed my 50-year-old co-worker pulling his finger out of his nose and immediately popping it into his mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 702

You deserved it 4 803

What am I doing?

By janesays - 24/02/2010 07:45 - United States

Today, my 2 year-old had a large booger blocking his nose so I pulled it out. I was on the phone and absentmindedly rolling it around between my thumb and pointer finger. I put it in my mouth and crushed it between my teeth for a solid minute before I remembered what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 592

You deserved it 66 557

By pathetic - 06/11/2013 13:04 - United States - Lincoln

Today, my grocery shopping consisted of Poptarts, SpaghettiOs, Lucky Charms, Popsicles, Easy Mac, and Twinkies. I'm a 25-year-old woman with no kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 992

You deserved it 22 596

By Wormy - 11/05/2009 19:45 - United States

Today, I bit into a Reese's Cup that had been sitting on my desk for a while. As I did, half of a yellow meal worm fell out and landed in front of me, the other half was in my mouth. It was wiggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 216

You deserved it 30 435

Ilovelife07 0

Saturday 23 May 2009 23:13

Serves that asshole Mr. Owl right, somebody was bound to foil his plans to keep the answer from the world

starbucks14 0

Saturday 23 May 2009 23:06

I wouldn't have wasted my entire day on that but i think the fact that you accomplished something like that is kind of cool, then again I'm 15. &hearts;

Comments

Caidoz_fml 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 11:08

At least we know now?

Epiphany1882 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 11:09

That is awesome. Its a pop culture, age-old question - now answered! Im sharing this on facebook. lmfao.

pumpkindoodle 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 21:51

TY for the info. Have always been too lazy to find out myself.

jerzygurl 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 23:09

mine was 1368 but i was 11

writerajere 0

Wednesday 27 May 2009 1:30

Why is this an FML, you've done a great service! The world finally knows!!!

chippah 0

Wednesday 27 May 2009 3:53

i got 416 when i was 14 but i will prob try again while older

LucienCrest 0

Wednesday 27 May 2009 4:15

I got 1110 a while ago- made sure i licked ALL the coating off

failwhatwhat 0

Wednesday 27 May 2009 5:17

YES. ive been dying to know. thank you so much !

stunnashades4ev 0

Wednesday 27 May 2009 5:26

NO FML this is a sick accomplishment

FeedtheBrood 0

Wednesday 27 May 2009 5:35

This is the opposite of an FML. Why are you submitting it here?

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Transportation Cars Awkward Dentist Health Love Shopping My ex Animals Cats Work Job interview Clothes Miscellaneous Weird Family Holidays Vacation AITA Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Funerals Harassment Relatable Engagement Food Ironic Money

The Top

Today, I went on a blind date. My date turned out to be very hot, and I had high hopes. That is, until she ran her hand through her hair as she approached, sending some kind of horrifying, miasmic mist of dandruff and dead skin floating through the air behind her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 186

You deserved it 8 136

Today, I put on my new sexy lingerie to get my husband in the mood after work. When I walked into the kitchen where he was reading the newspaper, he eyed me and simply said, "Honey, please, your stomach is the biggest turnoff ever." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 619

You deserved it 15 052

The Top

Today, I still can't talk to cute girls my age without getting tics. I'm over 30, a lesbian, and technically still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 986

You deserved it 219

Today, I went from a party where both of my girlfriends decided to show, to a hospital bed with no girlfriends and a painful left testicle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 530

You deserved it 244 071

Today, I wore a tank top for the first time in a few years. It turned out even worse than the last time. I got insulted by several people over my "Never say never" upper chest tattoo, which I got years ago, before the words ever became associated with a certain douchy Canadian pop "singer". FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 294

You deserved it 10 807

Today, my husband cheated on me. In my house. While I was home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 857

You deserved it 2 018

Today, I got a nose piercing. I was asleep at the time in my backyard, and the piercer was a snake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 710

You deserved it 2 975

Today, I had to help one of my best friends while he was having a seizure. Earlier this morning my longtime girlfriend broke up with me. Oh, and also earlier this week I found out my other best friend has cancer. Lord take me now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 005

You deserved it 111

Same thing different taste

What am I doing?

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