Love: Today, I told my younger brother that I'm a lesbian. Now he keeps... - FML

By Sarah - 09/04/2015 20:24 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, I told my younger brother that I'm a lesbian. Now he keeps asking me if I want to play rock, paper, vagina. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 011

You deserved it 5 482

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Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

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Same thing different taste

By Wenny - 18/01/2009 12:41 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me that he was gay and that he is in love with my younger brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 421

You deserved it 2 978

Thanks for the input

By NVP - 18/01/2009 14:30 - United States

Today, I told my 10 year-old brother I was turning 23. He said, "You need to get a boyfriend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 485

You deserved it 3 816

About that...

By Gay younger brother - 30/06/2018 01:30

Today, my brother came out to our parents. They weren't super happy with it, but they said that it was ok since they still had a straight son. I don't know how to tell them that I'm gay too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 622

You deserved it 520

By Evaki1 - 13/06/2011 14:24 - Greece

Today, I had to explain to my little brother that my tampons weren't ear plugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 683

You deserved it 4 583

By Anonymous - 14/06/2014 06:42 - Canada - Regina

Today, my older brother managed to convince my younger sister that she's actually a boy, and that she'll soon be getting a penis in the mail, which she excitedly told everyone she could. He convinced me of the exact same thing as well several years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 514

You deserved it 7 055

Supportive

By bopbop - 20/05/2009 01:21 - United States

Today, my brother came out to our family as being gay. My mother starting crying because she "wanted grandchildren." I told her that I was planning on having children. She started crying harder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 082

You deserved it 4 371

Assumptions…

By Singlelady - 21/09/2016 19:16 - United Kingdom - Stoke-on-trent

Today, my sister gently asked me if I was gay. Turns out I've been without a boyfriend for so long that the whole family believes I secretly have a girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 863

You deserved it 1 165

By Anonymous - 02/01/2014 09:50 - United States - Southerly North Slope Bo

Today, I tried proving to my best friend that I wasn't a lesbian by telling her I once liked her brother. She was mad because I never told her and now she's calling him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 090

You deserved it 6 349

Mixed signals

By max - 07/02/2009 23:33 - United States

Today, I thought I was going on a date. About 20 minutes into it, after giving her my arm to hold (like a true gentleman) it came up in conversation that my brother is gay. Her response: "Oh, so both you and your brother are gay?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 431

You deserved it 2 984

By lonleystoner91 - 03/09/2010 08:30 - France

Today, my girlfriend of 2 months decided to wrestle with my younger brother. He has gotten more action than I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 043

You deserved it 7 645

Next

Top comments

luarasticks 13

Friday 10 April 2015 10:38

technically, the joke would still work with the classic rock, paper, scissors.

gracehi 31

Friday 10 April 2015 10:22

That sucks, although I'm guessing you don't.

Comments

Irish_Sarcasm 5

Friday 10 April 2015 10:47

Aw he just had a sense of humor... Though that would get annoying fast lmao

Cassandra2015 21

Friday 10 April 2015 11:00

Good on you for opening up to him . As you said he's younger, so chances are he didn't mean anything in a negative way

Girlie7 11

Friday 10 April 2015 11:10

Well....you can't play it with him,technically....

plaukje 6

Friday 10 April 2015 11:19

great that you got a chance to come out, with me it wrnt smoothly and i hope people will still see the best in you

wakemeupplease 21

Friday 10 April 2015 11:26

idk how that can work... does he have a ****** too?

Abhinow 7

Friday 10 April 2015 11:30

A Dyke and a dick in same family

glabberfasted 16

Friday 10 April 2015 11:35

"Scissor me, Xerxes!"

ADBurns 22

Friday 10 April 2015 11:48

Your brother is awesome. Not only has he wholeheartedly accepted the situation with humour he is actively requesting your participation in the humour of the acceptance of it :)

JessLaw22 9

Friday 10 April 2015 12:08

Hey at least you will win every time.. ****** beats everything!

Scorpio01 16

Friday 10 April 2015 12:11

Lannisters coming

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Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Sleep Love Dating Am I overreacting? Annoying Health Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Teenagers Dogs Animals Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

The Top

Today, I was called by my son's school. They said he'd been forging my signature and comments in his reading book. He didn't forge them. I don't know what's worse: my handwriting looking like a 6 year-old's, or being too cowardly to admit it. He has a week of lunch detention, but I still have my dignity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 391

You deserved it 115 808

Today, I was at a guy's house that I’d been seeing for a while. After watching a movie, I confessed that after these past few times we’ve hung out, I’ve started to catch feelings. He looked at me and said, "I actually don’t think I want anything serious, but are you down to be friends with benefits?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 547

You deserved it 476

The Top

Today, I called my mom for her birthday. She started talking about an infomercial she'd seen for a combo bidet-and-dryer, and how she would like to get one so she can feel "fresh down there" without worrying about getting bits of toilet paper on her nether regions. I can't un-hear this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 006

You deserved it 3 090

Today, ever since he got out of jail, my brother thinks it's hilarious to use the skills other inmates taught him to break into my house, setting up pranks, or watching tv and waiting for me to get home. It's mostly harmless, but it is still majorly pissing me off. Should I call the cops if he continues? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 172

You deserved it 137

Today, my boss forced me to come into work despite having a bad cold. While waiting a table, I violently sneezed and sprayed a child's face with snot. His dad got so pissed that my boss had to pretend to fire me just to calm him down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 724

You deserved it 2 652

Today, I was taking a selfie in a café because the lighting was perfect. As I leaned back for the perfect angle, my chair tipped over, and I fell to the ground in front of a bunch of people. The barista was so concerned, he came over with a first aid kit, while I just wanted to disappear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67

You deserved it 677

Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 599

You deserved it 9 130

Today, and ever since the start of the Covid pandemic, my friends have progressively stopped talking to me. They've stated at the time that they are too tired, their significant other won't let them, or they're simply sick of me. I still want to hang out as usual, but I don't have who to hang out anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 823

You deserved it 184