Health: Today, I tried to treat a cut on my butthole with Neosporin.... - FML

By 11niko - 02/02/2012 04:57 - United States

Today, I tried to treat a cut on my butthole with Neosporin. I couldn't see it properly, so I had to use the front-facing camera on my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 080

You deserved it 7 022

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By What an ass - 23/02/2021 14:01 - Australia

Today, while using my phone camera as a mirror, I managed to broadcast a Facebook Live video of myself applying haemorrhoid cream to my asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 767

You deserved it 1 257

Get a look at this

By Buttscratcher - 03/03/2012 16:12 - United Kingdom

Today, I was suffering from a persistant, irritating itch on my butthole. Worried, I took a picture with my iPhone to get an idea of what was causing said itch. I never found the source, but my Mum and grandmother did, on the iPad. Thanks, Photo Stream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 922

You deserved it 31 876

By Anonymous - 11/05/2019 02:00

Today, I noticed a spot on my leg that I wanted a closer look at. I went to put my phone screen towards it for more lighting while my sister was in front of me, looking. I'm pretty sure she saw my nude that I forgot was on the screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 635

You deserved it 2 382

By Anonymous - 02/03/2016 05:06 - United States - Miami

Today, at work, man who was buying medicine for his son came up to me for help. He didn't know how to explain it to me, so instead he showed me a picture of a rash on his kid's butthole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 777

You deserved it 1 686

TMI FML

By Anonymous - 10/06/2021 06:01

Today, I had to take a photo of my asshole after I sat on a rusty nail, causing considerable pain. Thankfully, no major damage was done. Unfortunately, the photo synced up to my mum's iPad, since it's linked to my Apple ID. FML

I agree, your life sucks 887

You deserved it 388

By jack - 27/08/2015 10:56 - United Kingdom - London

Today, due to medication I am taking that causes constipation, I have become all too accustomed to using a disposable rubber glove to dig crap out of my own butthole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 171

You deserved it 2 426

By RIP iPhone - 26/02/2017 06:00 - United States

Today, I was using my flashlight app in the driveway to avoid stepping in puddles, as my new shoes are untreated suede. I dropped my phone in the puddle instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 556

You deserved it 2 045

By Anonymous - 29/03/2018 19:30 - United States - Stamford

Today, I was checking my phone while using the toilet. In a distressing moment of my brain mixing up the signals to my hands, I dropped my phone into the bowl and pressed my thumb into the shitty paper to turn it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 626

You deserved it 3 726

By msarosi - 28/04/2013 10:28 - Canada - Port Perry

Today, I popped a pimple while stopped at a red light. When I looked over the woman in the car next to me was laughing, and had her camera phone out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 168

You deserved it 16 824

Nice.

By poururheartout - 27/07/2018 20:30

Today, I went to the ER as I have an ulcer and I was exhibiting signs of a perforation. This is when the gorgeous doctor told me he had to stick his finger up my butt to check for rectal bleeding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 280

You deserved it 398

Next

Top comments

LexSwift 17

Thursday 2 February 2012 8:40

What in the world are you sticking up there that it's cutting you?

JoshTheMaggot 8

Thursday 2 February 2012 8:40

How did you get a cut on your butt hole in the first place? Sharp objects aren't meant for the ass..

Comments

grimster321 0

Sunday 5 February 2012 5:40

... How the hell do you cut your "butthole"

Evo97 0

Sunday 5 February 2012 6:06

Smart.... That's what I would have done

COCKYmanUSC 3

Monday 6 February 2012 4:13

Technology at its finest

steve94l 1

Monday 13 February 2012 20:05

sharp fingernails?

jazzy131 0

Saturday 25 February 2012 14:49

How the hell did you get a cut on your butthole?

meridius4510 4

Wednesday 21 March 2012 15:43

29 how do u think that guy explained that at the ER? My "friend" set that vid as my homepage.

Synistiel 14

Thursday 17 May 2012 4:09

So the FML is that you had to use your phone? That's not even FML worthy... And a cut heals just don't shit for a day maybe two. There's only so few FML worthy posts...

sammyluvspugs 4

Wednesday 23 May 2012 13:51

Why in the fudge do u hav a cut up there?? Actually i dont wanna know..

electric_waffle 6

Sunday 10 June 2012 4:21

How did you cut your butt hole?...

CyberGothic 16

Friday 13 December 2013 19:13

And now I know what my Grandfather was talking about when he'd say that someone was so dumb they couldn't find their own ass with both hands.

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The Top

Today, I woke up to find out I'd had a wet dream last night. About someone other than my girlfriend. I don't remember anything about the dream, but my girlfriend remembers everything because apparently I talked throughout my dream, and she was right next to me listening. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 925

You deserved it 5 942

Today, I got home and found my girlfriend in bed with another guy. After the screaming, yelling, and kicking them both out of my house, all I wanted was whiskey. I found the bottle under the bed. It wasn’t enough the guy was porking my girlfriend, he had to drink my booze too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 542

You deserved it 113

The Top

Today, I was getting my cat some canned food. Out of habit I licked the spoon after I had emptied the can only to realize too late what I had done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 720

You deserved it 18 763

Today, after taking a shower, I noticed a weird noise and asked my husband about it. "I think it's in the walls," I told him. After careful inspection, he simply turned off the electric razor I had just used to shave my legs and gave me 'that' look. I had beaten him in an IQ test not 24 hours prior. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 018

You deserved it 44 119

Today, in geometry class, we were working in dead silence. Apparently my phone wasn't on vibrate, and I received 25 texts all at once, while it blasted "Hakuna Matataaaa" out of my back pocket. They weren't even texts from friends, just Facebook notifications. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 185

You deserved it 36 010

Today, my local USPS delivery man refused to deliver any more packages to my house, because in the past, my dogs have barked at him and he feels threatened. He also filed a complaint about our house because apparently my driveway has branches that, to him, are considered "hazardous." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 891

You deserved it 4 075

Today, it was the first day of school, and I split my pants. In a full class. While on a stage. I'm the teacher, and I wasn't wearing underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 978

You deserved it 9 036

Today, my brand-obsessed sister bought $200 shorts. She was cutting the tag off of them in the kitchen and left them on the counter. I went into the kitchen, poured me some coke, and spilled it all over the counter. I thought the shorts were a rag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 861

You deserved it 360