Money: Today, I've been considering breaking up with my girlfriend so...

By fmlguy - 10/12/2010 03:19

Today, I've been considering breaking up with my girlfriend so I don't have to buy her a Christmas present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 259

You deserved it 86 250

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Her revenge

By Anonymous - 25/02/2020 22:00

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She then proceeded to ask for all the gifts she gave me for Christmas back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 710

You deserved it 771

By John - 19/11/2011 17:50 - United Kingdom

Today, I had a very long, complicated talk with my girlfriend. Apparently, since she isn't religious, she doesn't have to give anyone Christmas presents, and yet expects everyone to give her some. She then told me what I should get her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 488

You deserved it 5 110

By manhood fading away - 25/12/2016 20:24 - United Kingdom - Heckmondwike

Today, because it was our first Christmas as a couple, I was careful to get my girlfriend what I considered to be a very thoughtful gift. She opened it, took one look at it, made a face like I'd just kicked a puppy, and told me that in future it would be better if I just gave her money so she could buy her own presents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 190

You deserved it 772

By holla1787 - 04/12/2009 03:11 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Her birthday is tomorrow so she sent her new boyfriend to pick up her birthday present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 545

You deserved it 2 820

Christmas Watts

By Conflicted as hell - 23/12/2023 03:00 - United States

Today, I’m trying to figure out how to spend Christmas with my wife and kids… and my girlfriend. I’m planning to divorce my wife in January, because doing it on Christmas would hurt them all, but I don’t want my girlfriend to know I’m married or else she’ll leave me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75

You deserved it 2 440

Sweet relief

By Anonymous - 17/06/2016 03:00

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was ecstatic. Apparently, she'd been trying to figure out how to break up with me for the past four months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 625

You deserved it 1 566

Run away, now

By Anonymous - 15/12/2016 04:50

Today, my girlfriend gave me a choice of having a circumcision or breaking up with her. Either way I'm going to lose something I hold dear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 428

You deserved it 1 081

By Anonymous - 24/09/2009 04:52 - United States

Today, I was planning on breaking up with my girlfriend of five years in two days time. She just mailed me a care package that said, "I'd die without you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 800

You deserved it 13 648

By R281780 - 14/02/2016 15:53 - United States - San Jose

Today, my girlfriend is locked in the bathroom crying because I didn't buy her anything for Valentine's Day, even though Friday, at her suggestion, we agreed not to exchange gifts because both of our birthdays are a week away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 416

You deserved it 4 169

Instagone

By Anonymous - 02/01/2018 22:00 - United States - Lyons

Today, I found out that my girlfriend of almost four years was breaking up with me when she captioned an Instagram post saying, "Who else besides me is going into 2018 single?" I had already bought an engagement ring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 317

You deserved it 346

GoingLesbian 0

Friday 10 December 2010 9:05

Does she have expensive tastes? Or are you seriously that indecent?

thatgirl503 0

Friday 10 December 2010 9:04

wth?

Comments

getzy 0

Friday 10 December 2010 9:50

that's chill as Fawk

allmidnighteyes 10

Friday 10 December 2010 9:52

Smoking fatties and pounding Natties. His life is so bro.

zoey0123 0

Friday 10 December 2010 9:56

wow, your am ass hole

at0micmin3r 23

Friday 10 December 2010 9:59

Wow, really? Wow, I can't call this one.

melaniekay87 0

Friday 10 December 2010 10:03

Today, you're officially a jerk!

Cjmw 7

Friday 10 December 2010 10:04

Man up Scrooge.

wesss_fml 0

Friday 10 December 2010 10:06

Dude.. that is cold

mpmarvin 0

Friday 10 December 2010 10:08

You don't deserve shit. You should run for d-bag of the year

sxychik 4

Friday 10 December 2010 17:27

I agree

lovelyllama3 0

Friday 10 December 2010 10:08

Asshole.

sannah_fml 8

Friday 10 December 2010 10:11

Five words: I can't afford it, dear. Most mature adults would understand.

NOWAYJOSE 14

Friday 10 December 2010 10:14

What was on her christmas list, a wedding ring or something?

Keywords

Thanksgiving Politics Health Family Argument Frustration Intimacy Sex Miscellaneous Love Awkward First Dates AITA Cars Road rage Transportation Animals Dogs Cute Alcohol Am I overreacting? Relatable Food Holidays Contraception Suspicious Cheating Gross Kids Poopoo peepee

The Top

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves, so I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview, I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 202 712

You deserved it 52 091

Today, while at the restaurant I work at, a bunch of kids came in. They all gave incredibly complex orders, laughed at everything I did, and made a huge mess by "spilling" hot sauce and water all over the floor. After they left, I was tipped eleven cents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 306

You deserved it 3 563

The Top

Today, in court, my client ran his mouth at the judge, cursing him out and then trying to lecture him on "freedom of speech" when he was found in contempt. I don't know what it is with these nutjobs, but I wish I'd never become a public defender. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 202

You deserved it 2 575

Today, I got my belly button pierced. The guy put a small dot with a sharpie right above the center of my belly button so he knew exactly where to pierce. I also have a small freckle noticeably to the left of center of my belly button. Guess which one he pierced through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 120

You deserved it 6 796

Today, my nose was itchy. As I reached towards it to itch it, I sneezed ridiculously hard. I punched myself in the eye and now it's all purple and puffy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 733

You deserved it 9 812

Today, I realized my husband of 30 years consistently makes fun of me in front of friends, and he gets mad when I express opinions contrary to his. I don't think he respects me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 152

You deserved it 172

Today, I tried to surprise my girlfriend by cooking dinner. As I was chopping onions, I cut my finger and started bleeding everywhere. She walked in, saw the blood on the onions, and almost passed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 686

You deserved it 124

Today, if I’m not at work, I’m spending my time racing back and forth between sheer relief that I’m no longer married to my ex-husband and that I’ve got my freedom and independence back, and bursting into tears because the slightest thing reminds me of him, and I miss the awful twat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 017

You deserved it 261