Miscellaneous: Today, I walked into the kitchen to eat some breakfast. I got... - FML

By vanorav - 18/03/2012 02:41 - United States - Santa Clarita

Today, I walked into the kitchen to eat some breakfast. I got a full visual of my drunk neighbor dancing naked in my backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 579

You deserved it 2 250

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By meeeoow - 22/01/2011 10:05 - Australia

Today, my drunken father decided to walk my quiet street naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 667

You deserved it 2 777

Family values

By Anonymous - 19/09/2009 04:55 - United States

Today, I went back home. My drunk mother was screaming at my drunk step-dad about a fight that happened four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "orgasm face", while the neighbors were dancing outside, coked out and naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 86 236

You deserved it 5 383

By AmberHavoc - 02/01/2013 15:01 - United Kingdom

Today, I got so drunk that I decided it was a good idea to get naked and jump on a trampoline in the back of a neighbour’s garden. Said neighbour is a police officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 998

You deserved it 46 803

By babyeaternomnom - 30/06/2012 16:22 - Canada - Brampton

Today, I caught my elderly neighbour skinny-dipping in my pool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 889

You deserved it 2 326

By oneloveliz - 17/09/2017 23:15

Today, I was watching my dog via security camera live feed, when my roommate came in completely naked to make breakfast for himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 473

You deserved it 1 572

There goes the neighborhood…

By Anonymous - 21/10/2021 11:00

Today, my drunk neighbor couldn’t get into his apartment and thought it would be a good idea to poop in our yard. He left a pile of diarrhea under our window, and poop-stained napkins all over the lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 022

You deserved it 67

By LovelySB - 21/04/2019 04:00

Today, while trying to get over all the emotional things I've been going through, I forgot that my bedroom door was open and here my silly behind was dancing in my underwear while my roommate watched on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 608

You deserved it 718

By MakesMeLol - 18/01/2012 22:30 - Ireland

Today, I turned on the news to see a live report about an increase in crime in my town. One minute in, my drunk daughter appears behind the news reporter, butt naked, dancing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 288

You deserved it 6 785

By adam - 03/02/2010 20:10 - France

Today, my mom woke me up and asked if I wanted breakfast. I had passed out naked on the kitchen floor after a party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 085

You deserved it 40 684

By Sprinkles - 04/02/2015 07:44 - Australia

Today, I discovered my elderly neighbour likes to roam around his yard naked and wash his balls with the sprinkler. I'm never going to grab a snack in my kitchen again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 896

You deserved it 2 729

Next

Top comments

pdp_fml 21

Sunday 18 March 2012 9:18

You should just go back to bed.

supimnyancat 9

Sunday 18 March 2012 9:21

Did you join him?

Comments

ILike_Dancing123 19

Sunday 18 March 2012 9:34

Wow what a nice way to wake up, seeing your drunk neighbour wiggling their bits about dancing. I bet seeing them after this will be awkward.

Jkolbly 11

Sunday 18 March 2012 9:36

Did you invite him in for breakfast?

deviable 9

Sunday 18 March 2012 9:37

Climbing while drunk is just too much effort, my bet is on op having to fix a new hole in his fence.

FatTony2010 4

Sunday 18 March 2012 9:38

Why not down some JD and join in?

cookeemonster 7

Sunday 18 March 2012 9:38

Maybe :) I wouldn't put it past a drunk to play hulk and create a hole.

chris36taylor 2

Sunday 18 March 2012 9:39

Was it a girl? If it was, join her. (:

OkitaCockroach 19

Sunday 18 March 2012 9:39

Mm, appetising.

ch3s 4

Monday 19 March 2012 4:11

Rarity, get your mind out of the gutter! :P

yuzuhere 21

Sunday 18 March 2012 9:43

Always brighten your morning with a glass of orange juice and a heaping bowl of naked.

ka1729 14

Sunday 18 March 2012 9:51

they were just saying good.morning

yuri63f6 7

Sunday 18 March 2012 9:51

Pics or it didn't happen.

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8

Keywords

Relatable Shoes Clothes Miscellaneous Transportation Insurance Cars Work Health Cheating Love Food Clumsy Embarrassing Awkward Animals Dating First Dates Bikes Cute Dogs Ironic Pranks Shopping Mistakes Texting Family Fight Birthday Drunk

The Top

Today, I thought it would be funny to go on my boyfriend's Facebook to change his status. While in the process, his account received a message. Turns out he's planning on hooking up with his ex-girlfriend/one of my friends and is definitely over me. How's that for snooping around? FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 373

You deserved it 37 039

Today, I yelled at my little brother for leaving the toilet seat up and told him he needed to go around the house and make sure they were all down. I went to the bathroom later to find that the toilet seats and covers from every toilet had all been removed and were sitting on my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 997

You deserved it 68 601

The Top

I shouldn't have said that...

I agree, your life sucks 239

You deserved it 96

Today, my mother woke up again in a bad mood due to the quarantine and went off on how us siblings complain about each other all the time. Truth is, she's the one complaining non stop about whichever sibling is not in the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 385

You deserved it 116

Today, my boyfriend of 8 months was having a really bad day at work. Thinking I would cheer him up a bit, I send him a picture of myself while I was changing. His response? He dumped me. He said it was unprofessional and immature of me to do that. He works in the middle of nowhere, by himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 620

You deserved it 168

Today, we were running a special at work that I had previously been told was an online-only special. After the general manager corrected me, I used the joke excuse of, "It's my first day". The customer replied, "I can tell". I've worked there two years and I'm the assistant manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 380

You deserved it 5 228

Today, I went to get my blood drawn for the first time. After I explained to the nurse how nervous I was, she replied, "Oh honey, don't worry! This is my first time too!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 738

You deserved it 2 992

Today, I found out why my ex of three years started an argument with me that quickly lead to our break-up. He said he would be talking to people of a different race to make life "easier." I should've seen the fact that he dislikes our own race from prior conversations. He ended up getting into a relationship two months later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 473

You deserved it 303