Miscellaneous: Today, I was at a basketball game. Sitting in the bleachers,...

By Anonymous - 05/01/2014 05:30 - United States - Saint Louis

Today, I was at a basketball game. Sitting in the bleachers, I looked over at my friend and said, "Number 33 has a really cute butt." The man in front of us turned around, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "Thanks." Number 33's dad was a very proud father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 720

You deserved it 14 094

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By Steph - 19/08/2019 02:00 - United States

Today, I was at a soccer game when some guys walking behind me yelled that I had a nice ass. I then heard someone shout, "Hey, assholes. That's my daughter." He yelled at them for quite a while. He wasn't my dad, just some weird dude. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 923

You deserved it 518

By Anonymous - 22/04/2009 21:46 - United States

Today, I went to my son's soccer game. I cheered his name at the top my lungs and waved with a grin on my face. I saw him whisper something to a team mate so I watched the film my husband took later that night. His friend asked, "Who is that?" and my son replied, "I don't know some fat bitch." FML

I agree, your life sucks 101 711

You deserved it 19 197

By notgay - 12/02/2013 02:30 - United States - Alfred

Today, I was walking with my friend. The girl in front of us had a really nice ass, so I turned to my friend and said, "Damn, she has a perfect ass." He replied, "That's a guy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 535

You deserved it 39 025

By amore89 - 28/07/2019 12:00

Today, I was with my dad at the supermarket and this guy was checking me out. My dad yells at him with a grin, "I know! I make beautiful babies!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 879

You deserved it 243

By SadDad - 06/03/2009 01:51 - United States

Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 316

You deserved it 4 358

Looking good

By lexibabe - 03/03/2009 00:36 - United States

Today, I was in the bank with my seven year-old daughter, when I saw an old high school friend of mine with his wife. I said hello, and he commented on how beautiful my little girl was. I thanked him, and as I turned away, I heard his wife say, "I guess the father must be the good looking one." FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 018

You deserved it 2 777

Dad jokes FTW!

By rositaleigh - 01/07/2019 00:06

Today, my father and I were out in town when a lady walked up and commented on what a great looking couple we were. My dad puts his arm around me and says "Thank you! We've been together for 17 years." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 922

You deserved it 234

The Nutcracker

By lalalohan - 17/04/2009 15:19 - United States

Today, I was at a ballet recital with my friend, sitting between her and the mother of the head male ballerina. When he came on stage in obscenely tight white tights I whispered to my friend, "You can see his whole freaking package!" I'd whispered to the wrong side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 777

You deserved it 64 421

By blenderbookf - 25/11/2010 18:33 - United States

Today, my dad was completely engrossed in a football game on TV, so, trying to be cute and funny, my mom flashed him. He didn't notice, but I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 042

You deserved it 3 195

By DetergentFrog6 - 07/04/2014 20:54 - United States - Rahway

Today, while playing basketball, my friend thanked me for passing the ball to him. I was too embarrassed to tell him that that was me shooting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 864

You deserved it 5 051

umidontrember 14

Sunday 5 January 2014 13:27

Well, at least he knew his son had a good butt.

Fuaaad1994 31

Sunday 5 January 2014 13:30

He then got up and asked if he has a nice butt too. Like father like son (or daughter)

Comments

aaron123111 11

Sunday 5 January 2014 18:54

jdwmoore 5

Sunday 5 January 2014 18:56

ydi

TheFonzzzz 1

Sunday 5 January 2014 19:26

That's my dad...that actually freaking hilarious that I found this on here haha he was telling me about a girl hitting on my butt hahaha

DestinyRose7 7

Sunday 21 September 2014 20:31

It was an SCC game. Congrats your ass got a feature :)

Sethreed12 4

Sunday 5 January 2014 19:29

I think op needs to clarify if it was a guy or girl

brandoneyez1 25

Sunday 5 January 2014 19:34

Guess you won't be dating him... Although you met his dad really quickly.

darshanbidkar 11

Sunday 5 January 2014 19:42

LOL.. What a coincidence..!

Gatitamew 4

Sunday 5 January 2014 19:52

lol Give him your number!

islandkid3 10

Sunday 5 January 2014 21:44

Where did you post this from because I played a basketball game yesterday and my number is 33. I'm not even joking

kitcatjb 12

Sunday 5 January 2014 22:17

Whys this an FML? Maybe the dad will tell his son you said that, and it'll help your game ;)

sammyjo06 14

Sunday 5 January 2014 23:06

I need to know the OP's and the basketball player's genders. Changes the whole story depending...

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Sleep Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Teenagers Dogs Animals Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

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Today, I told my wife I had a huge Zoom interview and could not be disturbed under any circumstances. Nevertheless, she called her mom, got into a screaming argument the interviewer could clearly hear, then came into my office to cry on my shoulder. She doesn't understand why I'm furious with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 553

You deserved it 59

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You deserved it 33

The Top

Today, I was excited that my new skin care regimen seemed to be paying off. I told my husband of 35 years about it and asked him if I "looked good". He looked me over as if I were a stalled engine and said, "You look less stressed. That's good, but I mean… You still look like yourself." FML

I agree, your life sucks 387

You deserved it 178

Today, I took a picture of my boobs and sent it to my boyfriend, only to realize after I hit "Send" that I had sent them to the taxi driver (my last phone call) who had just dropped me off at my house. He won't stop calling my phone now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 608

You deserved it 57 651

Today, in bed, my wife took her vibrator and started masturbating. Feeling excited, I went down to help her. She told me to knock it off 'cause she couldn't focus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 961

You deserved it 641

Today, I realized that my long term boyfriend still prefers video games over his kids and our sex life. I haven't had sex in over a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 923

You deserved it 332

Today, my family savagely mocked me to the point of tears, all for using "big", "fancy" words like "accommodations" and "hospitality". FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 396

You deserved it 1 483

Today, I went with my boyfriend to the optometrist for him to buy contact lenses for the first time. He said the detail was much better than glasses. I excitedly asked him if he could see my freckles better now, and after a long and disappointed look at my face, he said "Nope, just more acne." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 614

You deserved it 3 787