Miscellaneous: Today, I was at a local chinese restaurant with two of my friends.... - FML

By Anonymous - 20/08/2009 05:30 - United States

Today, I was at a local chinese restaurant with two of my friends. We were laughing hysterically when my friend tells me to stop making her laugh because she was going to puke, naturally I kept egging it on. She puked all over the table and I was laughing so hard that I peed my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 777

You deserved it 66 976

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Same thing different taste

By Titi14 - 04/03/2010 03:19 - United States

Today, my best friend decided she wanted to tell my boyfriend about the time I pissed myself laughing at her house. When she was telling the story I ended up laughing so hard, that I pissed myself again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 557

You deserved it 25 967

Spit take

By gatorhead - 09/09/2010 18:05 - United States

Today, while eating lunch, one of my friends told a joke that made everyone at the table laugh. Apparently, the guy standing behind me overheard and was laughing too. So much in fact that he spewed the red Gatorade he was drinking all over the back of my white shirt and hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 476

You deserved it 2 502

By Anonymous - 17/01/2010 13:44 - United States

Today, my friend decided it was funny to burp in my face. The burp was actually vomit. We were in the food court at the mall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 187

You deserved it 2 722

Gross out competition

By shattysituation - 31/12/2012 22:36 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 429

You deserved it 4 057

By sadddddd - 11/09/2011 01:54 - Canada

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick. I went to the bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet, waiting to throw up. When I finally did, I violently shit my pants at the same time. I was at my friend's house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 881

You deserved it 3 270

By gingerbread - 18/12/2017 18:00 - Armenia - Yerevan

Today, I got a little too drunk at my best friend's birthday party and threw up in the pub bathroom. I wiped everything up, composed myself, and went back to the party table before promptly throwing up on myself in front of the whole pub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 990

You deserved it 3 710

Food flight

By ashley_skillz06 - 24/01/2010 05:21 - France

Today, I went to a Japanese restaurant. While the chef was throwing food at us, I was getting ready for my turn. He tossed a piece of broccoli at me, I leaned back to catch it, completely falling off my chair. I knocked everything over and had the packed restaurant laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 360

You deserved it 7 403

Panic!

By Anonymous - 31/12/2023 08:00 - United States

Today, I fucked up by trusting the wrong fart and shat myself in the middle of the restaurant I was eating lunch at. I was so mortified, I couldn't even finish the meal I paid for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 255

You deserved it 481

By levi Glasscock - 15/04/2011 13:52 - United States

Today, my mom called me and said, "I made your sister laugh so hard she peed her pants." I got home and noticed she also peed on my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 133

You deserved it 2 982

Big Joel strikes again

By jpaylay - 10/05/2023 00:00

Today, while watching YouTube, I was drinking when something funny happened. I laughed, choked, and threw up all over the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 592

You deserved it 263

Next

Top comments

papertigers_fml 0

Thursday 20 August 2009 12:25

Classy.

Jonasgl 0

Thursday 20 August 2009 12:16

so what was so funny? ;P

Comments

leahmae88 7

Wednesday 11 July 2012 0:55

What a group lol

newstart11 9

Saturday 4 May 2013 1:28

That sounds like a great time haha :)

aimeegoldberg 22

Monday 9 September 2013 20:03

dont you know that when someone says "puke" - you stop, drop, and roll (away)?

homes7d 14

Tuesday 19 November 2013 23:16

Best **** my life

NamelessFace 22

Monday 26 January 2015 19:53

Should we feel bad for you because you and your friends are obnoxious?

udaykataria 18

Monday 9 May 2016 12:49

Are you five?

Stephanie High 6

Friday 12 January 2018 6:03

I can't help but think about the second friend you were with. That poor person :(

Keywords

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