Kids: Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids, when a girl in...

By pda - 25/08/2013 02:46 - United States - Short Hills

Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids, when a girl in line next to us slipped a hand down her boyfriend's pants and started groping him. I politely asked her to stop, to which she snorted, "Why? Your kids've gotta learn the birds and bees somehow." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 176

You deserved it 4 699

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Same thing different taste

By singlemam - 15/03/2016 01:51 - United States - Akron

Today, while at the park, my 3 year-old ran up to a lady, grabbed her chest and loudly asked, "Are these your breasts? Are they private on you too?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 180

You deserved it 2 083

By gloomy - 15/08/2017 20:00

Today, my daughter and I went to the mall. While we were looking for clothes, she walked away from me and touched a man on the arm and smiled and said "Hi!" The man freaked out and screamed at me for letting that "thing" in public and to "wear a condom next time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 807

You deserved it 828

By Anonymous - 03/07/2015 20:51 - United States

Today, I had to profusely apologize to a woman after my six year old son decided to crawl between her legs at the supermarket, then look up her skirt and loudly ask why she didn't have any panties on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 108

You deserved it 4 035

By Anonymous - 17/09/2014 21:57 - United States - Dewitt

Today, my 4 year old son groped my breasts and said, "This is what daddy told me to do." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 560

You deserved it 4 699

By Mikabe - 14/02/2011 18:51 - Sweden

Today, I was working as an intern at a day care. One of the kids touched my chest a couple of times, and I jokingly told him that he shouldn't touch old and ugly women like me. So he started groping the little girls instead. When the other teachers asked him why, he said I had told him to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 419

You deserved it 12 968

Baller move

By notafan - 07/08/2019 00:01 - United States

Today, I was at a baseball game. This kid in front of me had binoculars and was constantly shouting. Trying to amuse the girl next to me, I leaned over and said, "That kid probably has wet dreams about baseball." She got up and said to the kid, "Come on honey, we're leaving." FML

I agree, your life sucks 576

You deserved it 3 543

By Oily - 16/12/2011 09:08 - New Zealand

Today, my 7-year-old daughter came up to me in a noisy mall and said "boo-boo" pointing to her hand. Not paying enough attention, I kissed her hand to make her feel better. She grimaced and said "No dad, bird poo." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 223

You deserved it 14 448

By notacreep - 16/05/2009 08:39 - United States

Today, I was at the mall with my girlfriend's family. Her 7 year old brother told me he was feeling sad, so I tried to give him a pat on the back, but it turns out he had a bruise there. He yelled out "don't touch me there!" In the middle of the mall. Now her parents think I'm a pedophile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 209

You deserved it 4 074

It's not what you think

By shway - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was at the grocery with my 4 year-old daughter. She needed me to tie one of her shoes so I bent down. When I was done, I tickled her under the armpit, and she screamed, "Don't touch me there!" Everyone in the store turned to stare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 966

You deserved it 7 439

By kaitlyna15 - 01/08/2012 01:54 - United States - Bellevue

Today, while life-guarding, I had to explain to teenage boys that shoving objects up each others' butts and complaining that someone was giving them anal was inappropriate at a family facility in front of kids under the age of 10. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 010

You deserved it 1 809

RodzillaX 30

Sunday 25 August 2013 10:17

Those lines do get very long and boring.

cuppycakeslove 20

Sunday 25 August 2013 10:23

Ugh, call security, that's public indecency and so disrespectful if its a family park.

Comments

sisco2901 20

Sunday 25 August 2013 13:10

I'm going to get buried for this, but I don't see why everyone's suddenly in a fit of righteousness and calling security, indecent exposure and shit. I don't mean that people should be allowed to do that in front of kids, but they were probably just pubes with hormones smacking their heads... So while it' certainly not appropriate, I wouldn't go as far as calling it disgusting. I think that if that girl was trying to be badass, it's just a pose, pretentious stuff. I think that a right and pointy remark would throw her off-balance and do the same trick of stopping them doing it with class and bonus points from OP's kids.

MuppetMerkin 10

Monday 26 August 2013 11:33

It's reactions like this that are the reason kids don't show any sort of respect to their elders anymore.

nnnope 26

Sunday 25 August 2013 13:29

well, op IS in New Jersey...it must be a "Jersey thing"

perdix 29

Sunday 25 August 2013 13:43

Ever since I witnessed the "Jersey Left" at intersections, I've understood that New Jersey is a whole separate world!

gallaeo 21

Monday 26 August 2013 5:01

Always enjoy your comments perdix. At the risk of sounding stupid, what's the "Jersey Left"? Or do I even want to know.. That just sounds like that could mean so many different things lol.

martin8337 35

Sunday 25 August 2013 14:07

Get a room!

thesubbybubbies 9

Sunday 25 August 2013 14:19

Yolo right?

silverfern 2

Sunday 25 August 2013 14:20

I just read a whisper status from (potentially) this girl last night haha. She gave him a hand job while waiting in line at an amusement park....awkward...