Kids: Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids, when a girl in...

By pda - 25/08/2013 02:46 - United States - Short Hills

Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids, when a girl in line next to us slipped a hand down her boyfriend's pants and started groping him. I politely asked her to stop, to which she snorted, "Why? Your kids've gotta learn the birds and bees somehow." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 176

You deserved it 4 699

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By singlemam - 15/03/2016 01:51 - United States - Akron

Today, while at the park, my 3 year-old ran up to a lady, grabbed her chest and loudly asked, "Are these your breasts? Are they private on you too?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 180

You deserved it 2 083

By gloomy - 15/08/2017 20:00

Today, my daughter and I went to the mall. While we were looking for clothes, she walked away from me and touched a man on the arm and smiled and said "Hi!" The man freaked out and screamed at me for letting that "thing" in public and to "wear a condom next time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 807

You deserved it 828

By Anonymous - 03/07/2015 20:51 - United States

Today, I had to profusely apologize to a woman after my six year old son decided to crawl between her legs at the supermarket, then look up her skirt and loudly ask why she didn't have any panties on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 108

You deserved it 4 035

By Anonymous - 17/09/2014 21:57 - United States - Dewitt

Today, my 4 year old son groped my breasts and said, "This is what daddy told me to do." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 560

You deserved it 4 699

By Mikabe - 14/02/2011 18:51 - Sweden

Today, I was working as an intern at a day care. One of the kids touched my chest a couple of times, and I jokingly told him that he shouldn't touch old and ugly women like me. So he started groping the little girls instead. When the other teachers asked him why, he said I had told him to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 419

You deserved it 12 968

Baller move

By notafan - 07/08/2019 00:01 - United States

Today, I was at a baseball game. This kid in front of me had binoculars and was constantly shouting. Trying to amuse the girl next to me, I leaned over and said, "That kid probably has wet dreams about baseball." She got up and said to the kid, "Come on honey, we're leaving." FML

I agree, your life sucks 576

You deserved it 3 543

By Oily - 16/12/2011 09:08 - New Zealand

Today, my 7-year-old daughter came up to me in a noisy mall and said "boo-boo" pointing to her hand. Not paying enough attention, I kissed her hand to make her feel better. She grimaced and said "No dad, bird poo." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 223

You deserved it 14 448

By notacreep - 16/05/2009 08:39 - United States

Today, I was at the mall with my girlfriend's family. Her 7 year old brother told me he was feeling sad, so I tried to give him a pat on the back, but it turns out he had a bruise there. He yelled out "don't touch me there!" In the middle of the mall. Now her parents think I'm a pedophile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 209

You deserved it 4 074

It's not what you think

By shway - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was at the grocery with my 4 year-old daughter. She needed me to tie one of her shoes so I bent down. When I was done, I tickled her under the armpit, and she screamed, "Don't touch me there!" Everyone in the store turned to stare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 966

You deserved it 7 439

By kaitlyna15 - 01/08/2012 01:54 - United States - Bellevue

Today, while life-guarding, I had to explain to teenage boys that shoving objects up each others' butts and complaining that someone was giving them anal was inappropriate at a family facility in front of kids under the age of 10. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 010

You deserved it 1 809

RodzillaX 30

Sunday 25 August 2013 10:17

Those lines do get very long and boring.

cuppycakeslove 20

Sunday 25 August 2013 10:23

Ugh, call security, that's public indecency and so disrespectful if its a family park.

Comments

thepancho 1

Monday 26 August 2013 12:20

your kid's obviously had no Idea what was going on. the one who brought attention to it is you. I don't like that. is it different if they were kissing?! her response was dumb but if you had told your kids "hey look at the people on the ride.." or whatever they would never have noticed. raise your kids yourself don't expect others to follow suit

EffYoLife 14

Tuesday 27 August 2013 23:23

shut up! you sound stupid. they had no business doing that in an amusement park where kids were present! that's what privacy is for! the mother wouldnt have called attention to it if they weren't doing it in the first place.

TheAngryPrincess 3

Monday 26 August 2013 17:59

I'd report her. She shouldn't be doing that at an amusement park with kids all around.

InnocentWings 13

Tuesday 27 August 2013 3:20

Wow. Seems they don't give any **** about public decency. FYL

crashley21 10

Wednesday 28 August 2013 22:13

I hope you contacted security. That's so disrespectful!

dmd316 9

Saturday 31 August 2013 11:20

You should have alerted the park authorities.... or hit her. Both ways, the bitch would learn a lesson.

niallers_cuddles 4

Saturday 7 September 2013 2:23

oh my gooseballs

SolidSteak 5

Sunday 22 November 2015 11:41

Violence is acceptable in this situation.

Shamrockbeefy 14

Thursday 31 March 2016 1:40

That is scummy taken to another level. "Stop jerking him off please, there are children here" "No, let them watch" Also how are either of them in the mood when they are surrounded by kids and strangers, dunno bout you but amusement parks aren't a huge turn on for me.