Work: Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code...

By tool - 09/04/2009 06:03 - United States

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 908

You deserved it 143 197

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 07/01/2013 21:27 - United States - Foxboro

Today, my son volunteered to help me cut out coupons. When I got to the register at the store, I noticed he'd cut off all the barcodes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 181

You deserved it 7 964

By Anonymous - 29/10/2009 05:15 - Australia

Today, I got a free temporary tattoo of a scorpion in a packet of potato chips and decided to wear it on my wrist. Whilst I was in the shower, I got a shock, thinking it was a spider. I then lost balance and slipped, banging my head on the faucet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 309

You deserved it 43 585

By scaredinnyc - 14/11/2012 01:03 - United States - Trenton

Today, I was looking at tattoos and fell in love with a really cool looking one, so I decided to get it. I later showed it to a friend who is a cop. He informed me that it is a gang tattoo. I think I just put a target on my ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 997

You deserved it 31 404

Great idea

By aridaley - 21/05/2011 23:33 - United States

Today, I got piss drunk. Being a tattoo artist, I came to the intoxicated conclusion that I could save much more money doing my own tattoos on myself. I now have my ex-boyfriend's name permanently on my thigh. It's not even spelled right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 536

You deserved it 65 008

By lk mm, n vwls - 11/01/2014 01:20 - United States - Mansfield Depot

Today, my boss hung a dartboard in his office. It has a printout of my employee photo taped to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 467

You deserved it 4 815

By nukebroadcast - 16/12/2010 06:32 - United States

Today, I found out what sound a hammer makes when it strikes the back of my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 318

You deserved it 6 016

By bananamuffin - 30/03/2012 19:13 - United States

Today, I realized that the "holla" tattoo I stupidly got on my lower lip five years ago isn't fading as I expected it to, and will probably contribute to my unemployment for years to come. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 010

You deserved it 74 032

By MissSmarts - 14/12/2009 01:27 - United States

Today, I went to the grocery store where this really cute guy works. I swiped my card but the machine wouldn't read it. I swiped it quickly some more before getting frustrated and saying, "Your stupid machine doesn't work!" He took the card and turned it around. His face said it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 977

You deserved it 39 670

By Username - 02/08/2011 14:52 - United States

Today, I got my eyebrow pierced. By a fish hook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 505

You deserved it 5 111

Sole music

By Anonymous - 16/12/2010 20:59 - United States

Today, a thumb tack came out of one of my posters on my wall. The sole of my foot had the pleasure of finding it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 388

You deserved it 3 980

scott1494 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 16:05

haaaaaaaahahahahahahahahahahahaaaa!!!! Talk about being a tool!!!!!

Tucatz 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 16:07

Could be worse- at the grocery store you might be a $0.69 can of green beans. And at the drugstore you could be Preparation H. In fact, that should be your new goal- to go around and find out what you are at various stores.

Comments

Golden_fml 1

Thursday 9 April 2009 16:10

ROFL #3

CinnamonSpider 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 16:11

That's actually kind of awesome that it scanned. Must be a well-done, if kind of weird, tattoo.

Good_old_Grim 8

Thursday 9 April 2009 16:14

Actually pretty much every barcode used on products is unique. As in - by the barcode alone it is possible to find out what an object is, where it is produced, by what company etc. So theoretically, it should be the same thing in whichever store. Or even more likely (this is what i'd actually expect) simply come up as an invalid code, because it is impossible to tattoo them accurately enough to be scanned properly. So it was either a faulty or some weird best-effort scanner or a fake FML.

TomTomSoup 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 16:15

Good work, Agent 47.

jm88 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 16:16

Nice, #3. YDI for getting a damn barcode tattoo..

nomadxx7 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 16:17

I call fake on this... What are the chances that you have the same exact barcode as a product in the store. The ONLY way that would be possible is if you went on the internet, found a random barcode and the tattooist was able to copy the thickness and exact lines of the barcode. If they missed one thin lie or substituted it wouldn't work. Sorry I just highly doubt the probability that you had a tattoo that was 100% perfect for an item in the store.

houndstoothk 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 16:18

yeah, i agree, sounds fake. would have to be so dead on to work right.

AngryAtheist20 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 16:18

If someone asks, you can just say you're carrying a hammer in your pants. What a tool.

ShutUpAndStare 7

Wednesday 16 May 2012 5:22

Sir, that was awesome.

ihatestupidpeopl_fml 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 16:19

HOLY MOTHERFUCKING SHIT! WHY THE **** DID YOU POST THIS. WHAT DID YOU THINK THIS POST WOULD ACCOMPLISH??? DID YOU EXPECT PEOPLE TO THINK YOUR LIFE IS ******??? THIS IS DEFINITELY NOT AN FML...THIS IS OMG I REALLY NEED ATTENTION, SO I'M GONNA POST THIS STUPID STORY, AND HOPE I BORE THE READERS TO DEATH, ******!