Intimacy: Today, I was doing the reverse cowgirl with my boyfriend. I was...

By Anonymous - 17/11/2011 14:06 - United States

Today, I was doing the reverse cowgirl with my boyfriend. I was on the way to a glorious finish when he pointed out that I had a pimple on my butt. He began to laugh so hard that he went soft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 711

You deserved it 6 089

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Same thing different taste

By >{%£•¥ - 27/11/2010 07:08 - United States

Today, right before my boyfriend and I were about to have sex, he touched his butt and says, "Oh I have a butt pimple." He then went and popped it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 073

You deserved it 4 155

Check this out

By Anonymous - 19/12/2010 05:24 - United States

Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom after he had been in there a while. I found him with his pants down, looking at a pimple on his butt in the mirror. He asked me for, "Help." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 874

You deserved it 4 545

By Anonymous - 18/02/2014 19:49 - Virgin Islands, U.S. - Kingshill

Today, while getting intimate with my boyfriend, he started sucking on my breast. He ended up popping a pimple on it into his mouth. He threw up and that, as they say, was the end of that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 320

You deserved it 19 287

Great expectations

By Anonymous - 23/10/2020 08:08 - United Kingdom - London

Today, after making love to my boyfriend, I went upstairs to shower. After turning it on, I found a huge pimple on my leg and the prospect of popping it excited me more than my boyfriend ever had in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 142

You deserved it 395

By anonymous - 02/11/2014 04:51 - United States - Vacaville

Today, my boyfriend was giving me a back massage while I was laying on my stomach. A few minutes into it, he stopped. I turned around to see why; he was taking a picture of my butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 173

You deserved it 7 657

Noob to boobs

By Anonymous - 29/04/2009 10:16 - United States

Today, I was feeling up my girlfriend's chest. I was getting into it until she said, "What are you doing?" I said I was rubbing her nipple. She replies, "That's not my nipple, its a pimple." FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 231

You deserved it 43 822

Comedy gold

By Landdownunder - 05/10/2019 06:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me and decided it'd be funny to blow raspberries in my crotch. He literally thought it was the funniest thing ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 808

You deserved it 338

Honky

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 440

You deserved it 5 222

Let it all out

By pottypattypeepants - 31/12/2009 20:04 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 690

You deserved it 19 647

By KAAALIS - 16/03/2009 02:20 - United States

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 738 551

You deserved it 495 699

every1luvsboners 11

Thursday 17 November 2011 18:58

Shut-up, idiot. Your girlfriend thought you had a pimple until you pissed out of it.

heathz 9

Thursday 17 November 2011 18:41

geez time to get off that horse.

Comments

catygirl 5

Thursday 24 November 2011 18:21

whats the reverse cow girl...

jmcdizzle 1

Sunday 4 December 2011 18:00

U should have ****** him harder

eatpraylovee44 0

Wednesday 7 December 2011 6:04

Awwww sad. ;c

crazydanny9870 0

Friday 9 December 2011 18:21

I'm an ass man so i can see beyond a pimple. So I'm guessing you had a small booty. Cuz girls with big butts your not gonna be looking for a pimple

JediScum 1

Sunday 22 January 2012 8:04

They will do it. Embarrass you every time. Pimples!!!! Nasty little *******.

TehPuffin 1

Monday 30 January 2012 17:14

Wow. Fail much.

leilasaltzman 1

Wednesday 21 March 2012 19:52

Hahahaha

corleon198425 22

Thursday 31 May 2012 21:38

I love a girl riding me that way

stevenmx86 7

Saturday 9 June 2012 22:07

I still don't understand why a pimple on your butt is so hilarious? Your boyfriend sounds like a moron...

talloctopus 7

Friday 15 June 2012 9:57

Dick

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my wife made me sleep on the couch because I ate the last Magnum Ice Cream bar. Last week, she bitched me out for singing too loud in the shower. I strongly regret leaving my ex-girlfriend of 5 years for this woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 504

You deserved it 1 909

Today, I was talking to my mother about my sex life, telling her, "If I want to have sex, I'm going to have sex." She looked at me for a moment and said, "You're staying a virgin until you get married." She wasn't ordering me, she was informing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 354

You deserved it 8 605

The Top

Today, I was stuck in what I thought was traffic on my way home from work. I started weaving in and out of traffic because it seemed to only be a few cars holding up the line. I get to the front of the line and I'd realized I just weaved through a funeral procession. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 125

You deserved it 58 339

Today, at a mall, my mom accused me of lying about being gay, just because I said I don't like shopping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 222

You deserved it 520

Today, my shirt caught on fire when I was burning paper for my ancestors at the cemetery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 347

You deserved it 369

Today, a coworker at school yelled at one of our students to be quiet. The kid got pretty upset, so I went to comfort him. He held my hand for the rest of the class, telling me in vivid detail how he was going to kill my coworker. Now I'm afraid to look at him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 761

You deserved it 3 633

Today, as it has been for nearly 60 years, my name is Karen. I’ve never once asked to speak to the manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 083

You deserved it 149

Today, my car was broken into. What was stolen? My steering wheel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 678

You deserved it 152