Kids: Today, I was dragged to a Super Bowl party. While there, the...

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By Anonymous - 04/02/2013 05:15 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was dragged to a Super Bowl party. While there, the host's kid threw 3 cups of apple sauce at my feet, which then exploded and covered my jeans. 10 minutes later, the host's wife announced that she was pregnant with twins. All I could come up with was, "You're making more!?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 787

You deserved it 6 530

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By Anonymous - 20/10/2024 16:00 - Ireland

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Today, I was at a party at my boyfriend's house. As I was walking past him, he pulled me onto his lap and started introducing me to a childhood friend. I sneezed and accidently peed on him. I'm 6 months pregnant and can't control my bladder. FML

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By embarassed - 20/03/2011 04:26 - United States

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I agree, your life sucks 38 045

You deserved it 10 514

By nobabies - 10/12/2017 01:30

Today, I attended my husband's holiday brunch at a company I also used to work for. I was excited to see former coworkers until one raced up, grabbed my belly, and in front of a crowded room, exclaimed, "You're pregnant!" Nope, just older and a bit fatter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 279

You deserved it 484

By kate - 29/04/2009 01:39 - United States

Today, I was eating at Applebees at a high table with bar stools. I was reaching over to get some gum out of mom's purse when my chair flipped out from under me and my soda fell on top of me and got in my ear. To make things worse, the waiter ran over and shouted "I give that one a 10!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 799

You deserved it 8 577

By Anonymous - 14/08/2012 15:42 - United States

Today, after much deliberation, I decided to accept my parents' invitation to a family dinner. A half hour after I arrived, all hell broke loose, because my mom's pregnancy test had come back positive, and she was convinced my dad had poked holes in his own condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 952

You deserved it 1 772

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By Mamaof2 - 11/01/2025 06:00 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, I was having dinner with my husband and two toddlers. My two year-old son was being incredibly cute and independently drinking water out of an open cup. I commented on how much I loved him. Two seconds later, he threw said cup with water at my head and started laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 371

You deserved it 172

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By Anonymous - 11/03/2023 12:00

Today, I was babysitting my friend's kids. One of the twin babies threw up all over my shirt and it went down my bra. Of course, I didn't have a change of clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 721

You deserved it 178

Blast from the past

By how old am I? - 07/05/2022 06:00

Today, I was hosting a small party for my nephews and a couple neighborhood kids. I unexpectedly started my period while I was serving the snacks. Have you ever been pointed and laughed at by a bunch of 12 year-olds? Ah, just like the good old days… FML

I agree, your life sucks 900

You deserved it 129

rattusrattus 18

Monday 4 February 2013 12:08

Trust me, you were only saying what everyone else was thinking.

DocBastard 38

Monday 4 February 2013 13:09

The difference between a good kid and a bad kid is a good parent who isn't afraid to say "no".

Comments

wvcheesehead1 9

Tuesday 5 February 2013 5:39

Proper manners would have bee. to congratulate the host. If you were aggravated by their children you should have found a polite excuse to leave. Are people not taught social convention any more?

dangerika93 11

Tuesday 5 February 2013 6:10

Wow you guys are horrible. Children are messy, and sometimes they have there moments. That doesn't make them brats...

bigtime_rocker 11

Tuesday 5 February 2013 6:12

A truly righteous comment! Some people can't learn from their mistakes...

laden_swallow09 34

Tuesday 5 February 2013 6:21

79- Yeah, it does.

False_Stupidity 41

Tuesday 5 February 2013 7:30

But, are you sure it was apple sauce...

LarryLaDouche 13

Tuesday 5 February 2013 8:44

I can't wait to have kids and raise to them to be warriors and trained in 7 different types of martial arts with 4.0 GPAs. Yeah, I'll be "that dad" but I'll have some bad ass kids.