Miscellaneous: Today, I was drinking in the park with my friends. Being drunk,...

By Anonymous - 29/09/2009 06:47 - United States

Today, I was drinking in the park with my friends. Being drunk, I relieved myself on a nearby tree. Unknown to me, a 4 year old was having her birthday party 100 yards away. I was arrested for public intoxication and exposing myself to a minor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 928

You deserved it 73 789

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Same thing different taste

By whatislife1969 - 08/10/2017 04:30

Today, my work had an employee party at the park and I drank a little too much vodka. Towards the end of the party, I found myself making out with a tree in front of all my co-workers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 425

You deserved it 4 852

By Chase - 15/05/2017 18:00

Today, I turned 21 and had a huge party because I could finally drink legally. Got arrested for public intoxication. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 335

You deserved it 6 411

By meeks123 - 20/06/2012 05:03 - Australia - Queanbeyan

Today, I was arrested for drinking in public. It was my friend who was drinking; I was taking the alcohol from her so she wouldn't be arrested. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 007

You deserved it 5 332

Busted!

By angela - 09/04/2020 23:00

Today, I went to a party. Although I wasn't drinking, I was still afraid the cops would bust me. Halfway through the party, the cops showed up. I tried to hop a fence, ripping my pants and cutting my leg in the meantime. It wasn't until was on the ground that I found out there was a gate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 468

You deserved it 2 106

By Noj12345 - 25/06/2009 08:05 - United States

Today, after finishing work, my friend was having a party next door and my driveway was blocked. I parked 6 houses down and went to the party for 20mins. After coming out after 3 beers, I went to move my car back to my house and go to sleep. I got a DUI for driving 30 feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 293

You deserved it 57 195

Childfree confirmation ceremony

By Kathya Wilson - 01/08/2022 10:00

Today, I hung out with a friend who doesn’t have any kids. We went to the park, where my three year-old son decided to drop his drawers and shit next to a tree. FML

I agree, your life sucks 775

You deserved it 309

By Unluggee - 04/06/2009 10:38 - United Kingdom

Today, at a party, my three friends and I thought it would be fun to urinate in a jug. We dislike the neighbours, so decided to throw the contents of the jug over the fence into their garden. It hit a tree and splashed back. I ended up covered in our piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 960

You deserved it 188 764

By gingerbread - 18/12/2017 18:00 - Armenia - Yerevan

Today, I got a little too drunk at my best friend's birthday party and threw up in the pub bathroom. I wiped everything up, composed myself, and went back to the party table before promptly throwing up on myself in front of the whole pub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 990

You deserved it 3 710

By AmberHavoc - 02/01/2013 15:01 - United Kingdom

Today, I got so drunk that I decided it was a good idea to get naked and jump on a trampoline in the back of a neighbour’s garden. Said neighbour is a police officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 998

You deserved it 46 801

Worst party ever

By Dumbass - 10/01/2019 12:00

Today, I got too drunk at a party and cracked a tooth from opening a beer bottle with my teeth, farted something nasty in a room alone with someone, tried to climb a tree and fell out, and watched my crush make out with his new girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 887

You deserved it 4 037

skullfuckery 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 16:15

Are you 13 or something? Drinking in a park, really?

powersmoke 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 16:12

YDI. Drink at home.

Comments

mrdecay 3

Tuesday 29 September 2009 16:53

YDI you wino.

satanstoystore 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 16:55

ydi. if you are that drunk in that situation then you have a drinking problem. get help.

lorib13 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 16:56

I was on jury duty for a guy who was drugged up and exposed himself to minors. We weren't even sure the kids saw his "stuff" but he was found guilty. Not only was he getting jail time and rehab but he was also labeled as a sex offender. Wasn't really funny...

russianspy1234 11

Tuesday 29 September 2009 17:03

The situation I am OK with, but why are you getting drunk at a time during which a 4 year old could have a birthday party? Since you didn't notice him while you were sober, you probably started drinking before they even got there, which would have been at what? 1pm? So you started drinking and got drunk at 11am? Yeah dude, you might be able to make the "I'm an alcoholic I couldn't control myself!" defense.

Witchcraft_fml 4

Tuesday 29 September 2009 17:05

You got what you deserved for being an alcoholic pedophile! :] Seeing as a four-year-old was having her birthday party in the park, this must have been around noonish. No other words needed.

darkmis1 17

Tuesday 29 September 2009 17:07

YDI for getting drunk in public. In a bar or at your/a friends house, is ok, but in public....and rite by a little girls party? YDI.

plexico 3

Tuesday 29 September 2009 17:10

If they could have a good look at your dick from 100 yards away, either they have bionic vision, or you are a very blessed dude. Good luck with that registered sex offender thing.

A83_fml 18

Tuesday 29 September 2009 17:20

couldn't agree more with this, that's a thumbs up plexico, unlike a lot of the other comments... See how you can be funny and not screwing other people over all the time =)

kyon65 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 17:33

lol texas

fxdxhk90 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 18:01

Please, 100 yards, the cop is reaching for a charge. Any decent lawyer should have no trouble getting that one removed. As for public intoxication, that ones probably gonna stick.