Miscellaneous: Today, I was eating lunch, and accidentally got ketchup on the...

By Anonymous - 24/05/2012 19:23 - United Kingdom - Sheffield

Today, I was eating lunch, and accidentally got ketchup on the sofa, so I hastily doused it with stain remover. The ketchup is now no longer there; however there is a larger stain in its place. I stained the sofa with stain remover. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 291

You deserved it 4 756

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Same thing different taste

Drunken mess

By SlutRobot6000 - 01/07/2022 04:00

Today, I'm using mold and mildew stain remover on my mattress, all because I threw up on it drunk, and was to lazy to clean it up when it happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 1 296

By Bawsack - 06/04/2017 00:00

Today, I dyed my hair. It was all going well, until I forgot I had a head full of product and scratched an itch. I didn't realise my mistake until later, and now have to replace my six-month old sofa because it has a huge stain that alternates from purple to bleach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 357

You deserved it 3 122

The temptation of the fries

By Anonymous - 05/04/2023 10:00 - United Kingdom - Leeds

Today, despite trying to lose weight for months and making progress, I went out to lunch with coworkers and ended up eating a huge burger and fries. When I got back to the office, I noticed that I'd spilled ketchup all over my shirt. Now I not only feel guilty about the food I ate but I also look like a slob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 603

You deserved it 350

By Anonymous - 18/12/2009 20:27 - United States

Today, my sister and I got into a fight. I came home to find everything in my room covered in ketchup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 119

You deserved it 4 836

By Anonymous - 16/12/2018 03:00

Today, I went on a date. I went to the bathroom for five minutes and returned to find my date had not only left, but poured ketchup all over our food to ruin it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 600

You deserved it 199

By xMiSS_CuTiEx - 27/12/2009 22:25 - United States

Today, I remembered my mom got her carpet cleaned and to be careful while she was at work. To be nice, I vacuumed the whole house. Feeling proud of myself, I got a drink and went upstairs. I tripped and spilled red Kool-Aid all over the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 109

You deserved it 14 370

By tirf - 09/02/2015 22:58

Today, while correcting essays, I spilled ketchup on a student's paper. I managed to successfully turn it into a happy smiley face but when proudly looking at the result, noticed it was right next to the big "F" that I had graded it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 862

You deserved it 11 070

Whatcha been up to?

By Just another Dude - 02/10/2017 13:00

Today, I spilled vanilla yogurt on my pants while eating breakfast, but I forgot to clean it up. It left a very conspicuous white stain on my pants, that was there the entire day. I only noticed it when I looked in the mirror after getting home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 960

You deserved it 974

By Lady - 11/01/2010 00:21 - United States

Today, I had to clean my house to hide the evidence of the party I threw last night. I attempted to clean the puke stain on my carpet while still drunk. I didn't realize until this morning that the All Purpose cleaner I used was actually All Purpose Adhesive. The evidence is now glued to my carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 285

You deserved it 44 352

By Danielle - 09/04/2011 23:00 - United States

Today, while dog sitting, the dog peed on the carpet. There was a bottle of cleaning spray on the counter so I sprayed the spot. Turns out that spray was Clorox Bleach. Now their carpet is bright orange. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 325

You deserved it 27 381

CoolBroStory 7

Friday 25 May 2012 1:18

Irony at its finest.

badbadkitty 5

Friday 25 May 2012 1:23

Could it be that now that spot is actually just cleaner than the rest of the couch now?

Comments

GaleIsHawt 5

Friday 25 May 2012 3:48

Well duh! Everyone knows stain remover actually causes stains. Dont they?

FucksIdntgive 0

Friday 25 May 2012 3:51

Dirty ass couch

BMC1999 0

Friday 25 May 2012 8:44

True dat

Hiphuray4peas 27

Friday 25 May 2012 4:00

That's why most stain removers tell you to test a patch in a non-visible area. Duh.

sammis 0

Friday 25 May 2012 4:02

That's why most stain removers tell you to test it on a small area first... But that is pretty ironic, sorry OP. At least you tried.

Megan98 18

Friday 25 May 2012 4:14

Remove it with stain remover! Oh wait....... Nevermind.

taconinja17 0

Friday 25 May 2012 4:41

Stainception!!!! but that blows:P

Jumpingmal2 7

Friday 25 May 2012 4:41

Easy solution, just douse the rest of the coach in stain remover so it all looks the same

quontag 15

Friday 25 May 2012 4:49

Wait, if the stain was larger how could it be in the same place? Wouldn't it be in a bigger area?

Unbweavable 17

Friday 25 May 2012 4:53

Are you sure that spot isn't just clean now?

uumlaut_strohson 3

Friday 25 May 2012 5:37

I don't care how old you are, when the ketchup bottle farts it's funny!

Keywords

Miscellaneous Family DIY Cats Work Poopoo peepee Awkward Management Frustration Am I overreacting? Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Transportation Animals ADHD Dogs Dating Love Technology Mental health Health Anxiety Sleep Clumsy Noise Roommate AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, I caught my husband of 13 years looking at other women in Instagram. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 417

Today, my dad is freaking out because he thinks he's next on the list of targets the NYC CEO shooter has. Not because he himself is a healthcare-ruining CEO, but he's a pharmacist who gets death threats every week from patients he can't give medication to, due to insurance companies denying everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 493

You deserved it 77

The Top

Today, while I was on stage dancing for a competition dress rehearsal, my top fell off, exposing my breasts. I was really embarrassed, but fortunately no one said anything about it. That is until a kid in the audience came up to me and said, "That was a disappointment." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 202

You deserved it 3 056

Today, after admitting he had feelings for me, my crush returned from out of town. He'd said that while he was gone, he'd meet people, but only think of me. He came back no longer single. He's known her for 4 days. We've known each other for 6 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 847

You deserved it 3 974

Today, I was visiting my grandma who has a beagle named Max. He was so excited to see me, he jumped on my face and peed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 397

You deserved it 696

Today, my girlfriend called my flaccid penis her "little squishy" in a voice like Dory, and became upset when I got aroused because little squishy was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 148

You deserved it 1 277

Today, my boyfriend thinks he's discovered a big conspiracy by dentists to sell toothpaste. He's arguing that nobody needs to brush their teeth, ever, because all the "new plaque" from food will dissolve the "old plaque", and the only thing he needs to use is breath spray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 539

You deserved it 2 402

Today, my Uber passenger stole one of the rear floor mats out of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 080

You deserved it 97

Same thing different taste

Drunken mess

The temptation of the fries

Whatcha been up to?

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