Intimacy: Today, I was giving a friend a neck rub, when she started to...

By Noname - 10/03/2009 09:56 - United States

Today, I was giving a friend a neck rub, when she started to breathe heavily. So I figured she was getting into it, so I started kissing her neck, she then turns around and says "Tell my room mate I'm having an asthma attack." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 065

You deserved it 61 331

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Same thing different taste

Sensual moment

By Ekh0es - 11/04/2021 15:30 - United States - Garfield

Today, I was giving a friend a neck rub when she started to breathe heavily. I figured she was getting into it, so I started kissing her neck. She then turned around and said, "Tell my roommate I'm having an asthma attack." FML

I agree, your life sucks 661

You deserved it 2 501

Nice way to go, really

By motorboatofdoom - 30/03/2020 05:00

Today, I learned that my girlfriend is terrified of me seeing her sex faces, so she violently squished my face between her boobs during sex. I then had a severe asthma attack because I couldn't breathe properly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 194

You deserved it 300

I'm coming !

By ally - 03/02/2009 19:34 - United States

Today, I was having sex with a guy that I just met, and when I thought he was about to orgasm, he actually had an asthma attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 238

You deserved it 8 526

By boo! - 17/02/2009 08:25 - United States

Today, I saw my friend across campus, and I decided that I wanted to play a trick on her and scare her from behind. Turns out, I scared a complete stranger with really bad panic induced asthma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 534

You deserved it 42 993

By Anonymous - 31/08/2013 20:52 - Norway - Nesoddtangen

Today, I had an asthma attack while in bed with my boyfriend. He interrupted my desperate coughing only to tell me to shut up. He then rolled over to go back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 930

You deserved it 4 019

By asthma_attacker - 14/11/2009 18:38 - United States

Today, I asked a girl I like out. She ended up having an asthma attack because she was laughing so hard. I guess that's a no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 721

You deserved it 2 915

Wanking to death

By Anonymous - 30/11/2013 00:17 - United States - Alpharetta

Today, I was rubbing one out in the shower. I guess I got a little too excited, because as I came close to climaxing, I had a serious asthma attack and had to wheeze for help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 752

You deserved it 12 427

By JRLJLS - 15/04/2013 09:09 - United States - Lehigh Acres

Today, I had phone sex with my boyfriend. He had an asthma attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 948

You deserved it 11 522

By Walter - 24/10/2015 03:17 - Spain

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting heated. I kissed her on the neck, chest, stomach, and threw up as I kissed between her legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 138

You deserved it 6 253

By Anonymous - 24/08/2013 22:31 - Isle of Man - Douglas

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. As I started getting close to having my first ever orgasm, I got extremely short of breath and started hyperventilating. His reaction was to cover my mouth to shut me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 274

You deserved it 7 766

MEGAJOSH 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 20:15

So you kiss people's necks when they breathe heavily? Creepy.

dol567 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 20:10

Just a 'friend'? Hope she's OK

Comments

Haut 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 21:00

Panic induced asthma? :o)

th3rapy 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 21:01

LoL, I like #10's interpretation ... ;)

one23four 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 21:34

Wtf? You're creepy. Just a friend, huh?

ashleyyy_08 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 22:06

maybe you could take it as a compliment?

Cloudy_fml 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 22:07

#10 +10bp

fortunecookie_fml 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 22:10

I'm with #13. just plain creepy.

well_this_sucks 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 22:11

#6 HAHAHA i knoe right!

AliSama 17

Tuesday 10 March 2009 22:15

#2 he said she was a friend and started sexual advances due to breathing. His assuming it meant she wanted to get it on is very assuming and rude.

awkwardpalmtree 0

Sunday 28 February 2010 17:31

OP is a girl. they are both girls. therefore OP is a lesbian..awkward

Kayokku 1

Saturday 10 September 2011 6:22

That's not awkward, it's sexy. I wish something that awesome would happen to me xD

yeahreally 6

Tuesday 10 March 2009 22:17

ouchhhhh

mrcarmine 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 22:36

ahhhhhh hahahahahaha oh man that sucks

Keywords

Embarrassing Love Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Money Annoying Gross Argument Ironic Friends Awkward Haircut Cute Holidays Lonely Relatable Capitalism Work Bosses You're fired Cars Health Covid Jealousy Cheating Kids Parenting

The Top

Today, my boyfriend of a year told me he is at the point in his life where he is ready to start a family, get married and have a baby. He also casually stated that he wished he could meet someone he could see himself settling down with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 335

You deserved it 4 257

Today, I realized that I’ve been using the same alarm clock ringtone for so long that I now associate it with pure dread, even when I hear it being used in movies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 348

You deserved it 106

The Top

Today, it's the day after I turned 40; I live in chronic pain and think about suicide on a daily basis. I have complex PTSD due to my military career and torment with high school bullies. Today I saw one of my HS tormentors co-starring in the new Guy Ritchie movie trailer, "The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare." So, seriously, FML

I agree, your life sucks 566

You deserved it 135

Today, my little sister decided to move one of the mouse traps I set for our current mouse problem onto my desk chair. Apparently when a mouse is caught in a mousetrap it's cruel, but when it snaps on my balls, that's hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 831

You deserved it 1 909

Today, while I was applying some eyeliner, my cat jumped onto the counter and managed to headbutt me. The wand scratched a good portion of my eyeball, and now for the next few weeks, I will have to deal with the pain of a corneal abrasion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 035

You deserved it 3 372

Today, one of my twin sons found out he's going to be a dad. His little sister who loves science ended up telling him that, since he has a twin who is genetically identical, he's genetically the baby's dad too. My son, being a bit dim, took this to mean his brother slept with his wife and hit him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 507

You deserved it 114

Today, I was playing some soccer with my buddies, when a kid came over, yelled "CUP CHECK!" and nailed me in the nuts then ran away laughing. Millions of my unborn children died in agony. All his fatass mom did was chuckle nervously and pat her satan-spawn on the head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 654

You deserved it 5 338

Today, I got a migraine. I work in an arcade with lots of bright lights, loud noises and screaming children. I was stuck in there for 7 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 424

You deserved it 3 221