Intimacy: Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to...

By scubai - 14/01/2010 20:36 - United States

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 601

You deserved it 5 735

Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Dirty talk

By Username - 24/02/2010 15:06

Today, as I was in the middle of giving my boyfriend head, he looked at me and said "Eat that cockmeat sandwich." He seriously thought it was a turn on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 787

You deserved it 4 770

Ouch

By Anonymous - 14/12/2011 23:12 - United States

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job. I thought it was going great and I was doing a good job, until he told me to "stop chomping on it like it's a hot dog." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 654

You deserved it 29 376

By esb - 13/08/2009 15:23 - Canada

Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "eat it, eat it!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 899

You deserved it 8 336

By jessica - 02/02/2011 20:59 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 364

You deserved it 7 468

By dom - 08/09/2010 06:53 - United States

Today, my boyfriend yawned while I was giving him head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 318

You deserved it 33 863

By anonymous - 04/11/2014 12:03 - Canada - North Vancouver

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob. I was laying in between his legs because it's just more comfortable. I looked down, and he had pieces of toilet paper sticking out of his butt cheeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 246

You deserved it 8 499

By Anonymous - 12/02/2012 04:52 - United States

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. Soon, I noticed he was being very quiet. When I looked up, he was in a deep sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 222

You deserved it 8 490

Say yes

By fuckingdonuts - 18/05/2015 02:54 - United States - Edmond

Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to ask if I wanted to get donuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 072

You deserved it 5 184

By Porkchop05 - 06/09/2009 05:44 - Canada

Today, trying to be sexy I was sucking on my boyfriends fingers. I was really starting to turn him on, when I noticed something crunchy in my mouth. Turns out, he went digging for treasure up his nose earlier. I found the treasure in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 014

You deserved it 14 741

By Anonymous - 13/01/2011 21:10 - Lebanon

Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 396

You deserved it 5 002

CitizenSnipz 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 23:48

Both of you were eating a delicious snack filled with cream. He was just seeing how it was for you!

doctorr_fml 9

Thursday 14 January 2010 23:44

that blows

Comments

nonametoolazy 0

Friday 15 January 2010 0:22

hey baby if you want someone show you a good time do me :p

waxx_fml 2

Friday 15 January 2010 0:25

what an asshole

NotQuiteKendall 0

Friday 15 January 2010 0:27

and you didn't hear him unwrapping it? I woulda treated his junk like a tootsie pop. how many licks til you can bite it in half. Let's find out. a-one, a-two-hoo, a-CRUNCH. 3.