Money: Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume....

By Lame - 10/07/2011 00:19 - United States

Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 932

You deserved it 6 793

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Same thing different taste

Mystery

By mugged - 01/06/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I got mugged by someone wearing a bear suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 270

You deserved it 4 713

By evil Santa - 25/12/2014 03:48 - United States - Solon

Today, I was mugged by a guy in a Santa suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 145

You deserved it 3 215

By no touching - 06/03/2015 14:03 - Australia - Blacktown

Today, at a music festival, some douche unzipped the back of my skirt, exposing my Ninja Turtle undies to everyone before running off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 684

You deserved it 5 212

By Starving Ultimatum - 02/09/2011 01:55 - United States

Today, I was robbed while recovering from a robbery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 942

You deserved it 3 127

By insomnitude - 05/03/2011 06:55 - United States

Today, I got mugged by a midget. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 774

You deserved it 13 804

Halloween has started early

By Anonymous - 22/10/2019 00:01

Today, while walking down the street, I was violently beaten up by a man in a Darth Vader outfit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 624

You deserved it 165

By Anonymous - 08/11/2010 01:13 - United States

Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 326

You deserved it 65 370

The Spectacular Spider-Thief

By Anonymous - 11/05/2018 15:00

Today, I went to a comic shop to celebrate Free Comic Book Day. A guy in a really nice Spider-Man costume showed up, so I asked and got a selfie with him on my way out. When I got home, I realized my wallet was missing from my back pocket. I was robbed by Spider-Man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 893

You deserved it 499

By RosaP - 28/02/2009 06:40 - Canada

Today, I slept over at a friend's house. We decided to dress up as ninjas and play a trick on her younger brothers, sleeping in the basement. While sneaking down the stairs, in the dark, her mother came home. Thinking I was a robber, she beat me with a lamp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 332

You deserved it 42 371

By Anonymous - 01/11/2015 15:12

Today, we had a great night out with my girlfriend and even won a costume contest together. I guess I wasn't the only one who had a great night, because when I got home I found that someone had robbed my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 317

You deserved it 1 333

Snowble11 13

Sunday 10 July 2011 9:24

What were you dressed as, Shredder?

CasualZombie 6

Sunday 10 July 2011 9:24

OH THE IRONY

Comments

iislix1ii 19

Sunday 10 July 2011 17:40

this is what happens when u give turtles shrooms.

TheNewGuy03 28

Monday 11 July 2011 16:19

well, when you give a grown man some mushrooms and he steps on said turtle, you have a mario game. |the kid|

keegan23 4

Sunday 10 July 2011 17:42

I don't see the fml here

goliatron 9

Sunday 10 July 2011 17:58

Coolest robber ever. You should feel honored, you ungrateful turd!

vanillatwilight6 0

Sunday 10 July 2011 18:00

i would have been okay with being robbed like that

savvyjiggly11 0

Sunday 10 July 2011 18:01

this is definitely a mlia. NOT an fml.

RuCheezBurger 10

Sunday 10 July 2011 18:08

WHAT A G!

SeedlessMe 13

Sunday 10 July 2011 18:09

I think we just found the new poster child for abortion. yeah, **** your life. Lmao!!!!

sweevil12 0

Sunday 10 July 2011 18:17

.... :D loser

Salvikidd 6

Sunday 10 July 2011 18:32

are you sure it wasn't Remi Gillard?

Salvikidd 6

Sunday 10 July 2011 18:34

Gaillard*

sportschicidee 0

Sunday 10 July 2011 18:38

lol thats hilarious! at least they did it in style rite?!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I told my wife I had a huge Zoom interview and could not be disturbed under any circumstances. Nevertheless, she called her mom, got into a screaming argument the interviewer could clearly hear, then came into my office to cry on my shoulder. She doesn't understand why I'm furious with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 642

You deserved it 79

Today, I was finishing a conversation with my husband. His phone rang, but he didn't take it. He said, "No, the guy said he was going to call me at 11:30 and it's 11:36. I'll call him in 3 minutes." It was then I realized that I have been the subject of this type of petty control for over 30 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 438

You deserved it 97

The Top

Today, I had a surgery to remove a cyst from my butt. Afterwards, the doctor told me that the cyst was bigger than he initially thought, it would still secrete fluids for two weeks, and the best remedy for this was to wear a Maxi Pad. I'm a guy, and am currently wearing a Maxi Pad on my butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 108 881

You deserved it 6 482

Today, everyone was telling me a girl I like wanted me to ask her on a date. I approached her, and asked if it was true. She said yes, but only because she wanted to reject me in person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 686

You deserved it 2 543

Today, I took the day off work to be with my wife, since she's always bemoaning my lack of romantic gestures. As thanks, she spent most of the day reading Fifty Shades of Grey, which is basically a blatant plagiarism of Twilight, starring a pair of two-dimensional BDSM freaks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 871

You deserved it 4 031

Today, I have four flights. I spent last night projectile vomiting with food poisoning. By the time I got to the airport it had progressed to liquid diarhea. Two flights in, I got my period. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 771

You deserved it 2 715

Today, I went into a public bathroom and walked in on a guy checking his butt out in the mirror to see if he'd wiped properly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 717

You deserved it 2 809

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. They thought it would be funny to pretend that they're nudists. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 037

You deserved it 4 974

Same thing different taste

Mystery

Halloween has started early

The Spectacular Spider-Thief

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