Money: Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume....

By Lame - 10/07/2011 00:19 - United States

Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 932

You deserved it 6 793

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Same thing different taste

Mystery

By mugged - 01/06/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I got mugged by someone wearing a bear suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 270

You deserved it 4 713

By evil Santa - 25/12/2014 03:48 - United States - Solon

Today, I was mugged by a guy in a Santa suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 145

You deserved it 3 215

By no touching - 06/03/2015 14:03 - Australia - Blacktown

Today, at a music festival, some douche unzipped the back of my skirt, exposing my Ninja Turtle undies to everyone before running off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 684

You deserved it 5 212

By Starving Ultimatum - 02/09/2011 01:55 - United States

Today, I was robbed while recovering from a robbery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 942

You deserved it 3 127

By insomnitude - 05/03/2011 06:55 - United States

Today, I got mugged by a midget. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 774

You deserved it 13 804

Halloween has started early

By Anonymous - 22/10/2019 00:01

Today, while walking down the street, I was violently beaten up by a man in a Darth Vader outfit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 624

You deserved it 165

By Anonymous - 08/11/2010 01:13 - United States

Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 326

You deserved it 65 370

The Spectacular Spider-Thief

By Anonymous - 11/05/2018 15:00

Today, I went to a comic shop to celebrate Free Comic Book Day. A guy in a really nice Spider-Man costume showed up, so I asked and got a selfie with him on my way out. When I got home, I realized my wallet was missing from my back pocket. I was robbed by Spider-Man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 893

You deserved it 499

By RosaP - 28/02/2009 06:40 - Canada

Today, I slept over at a friend's house. We decided to dress up as ninjas and play a trick on her younger brothers, sleeping in the basement. While sneaking down the stairs, in the dark, her mother came home. Thinking I was a robber, she beat me with a lamp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 332

You deserved it 42 371

By Anonymous - 01/11/2015 15:12

Today, we had a great night out with my girlfriend and even won a costume contest together. I guess I wasn't the only one who had a great night, because when I got home I found that someone had robbed my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 317

You deserved it 1 333

Snowble11 13

Sunday 10 July 2011 9:24

What were you dressed as, Shredder?

CasualZombie 6

Sunday 10 July 2011 9:24

OH THE IRONY

Comments

jcingram 2

Sunday 10 July 2011 16:00

Cowabunga

PeytonBieda 8

Sunday 10 July 2011 16:16

I bet your life is average.

PeytonBieda 8

Sunday 10 July 2011 19:54

Why was my comment moderated?

psychodude8 4

Sunday 10 July 2011 16:19

swag

cagesgirl 0

Sunday 10 July 2011 16:25

I'm sorry, but this is hilarious!

nekro_onslaught 0

Sunday 10 July 2011 16:42

BAHA did he say "give me your ****** money dude!!" and when he escaped did he yell "cowabunga!"???

aaronateb 0

Sunday 10 July 2011 16:44

hahahahahahaha XD

angel42_fml 0

Sunday 10 July 2011 17:14

that's awesome!! not about you getting robbed, but did you laugh?

Becca456123 0

Sunday 10 July 2011 17:28

Lmfao, i'm sorry thats so funny xD

jadengtfo 0

Sunday 10 July 2011 17:31

that almost seems like a good thing....

OneToughChick 13

Sunday 10 July 2011 17:40

the guy in the TMNT costume totally wins for his awesomeness. :)

Keywords

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Today, I tried to talk to my teenage son about healthy masculinity. He said, "Yeah Mom, I know. Lift weights and eat red meat and fish. Can I go?" Not what I meant at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 249

You deserved it 369

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The Top

Today, as usual, my flatmate is so loud when talking face to face that my ears and head rattle. I can't say anything because how dare I suggest there's anything wrong with my roommate's hearing. Yet nobody else talks this loud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 842

You deserved it 151

Today, I found out the coworker I was seeing gave me the clap. She resigned two weeks ago and isn’t answering her phone. I can’t blame my wife because she was a virgin when we got married, and has only been with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 6 515

Today, I went to a theme park with my friends. I was excited to ride the rollercoasters, but just as we were about to get on the biggest one, I realized I'd had left my glasses in the car. I can't see shit without them, but I decided to go on the ride anyway. I spent the entire time screaming in terror while my friends laughed, while I couldn't see a thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 178

You deserved it 684

Today, my beyond spoiled stepdaughter threw a massive fit, swearing she was going to sue her employer for discrimination after firing her. Her dumbass believed she could take her dog to work with her, and the company couldn’t legally ask if it was a service animal or not. She worked at McDonald’s. FML

I agree, your life sucks 993

You deserved it 176

Today, my friend beat me at a video game. He got smug, so I made an "I fucked your mom" style joke. Yeah, kina forgot for a minute that his mom died last year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 1 273

Today, I asked out this girl at work who I've had a crush on for a while. She looked oddly familiar, aside from the fact that we worked together. It was almost like we'd met outside of work. Two hours and one Snapchat story later, I realized I'd asked out my best friend's girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 426

You deserved it 5 017

Same thing different taste

Mystery

Halloween has started early

The Spectacular Spider-Thief

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