Health and Miscellaneous: Today, I was singing while lying upside down chewing gum. My...

By LaurenLehmmman - 27/12/2009 22:22 - United States

Today, I was singing while lying upside down chewing gum. My dad was trying to focus on the current football game and hushed me. I yelled, "No!" resulting in my gum becoming lodged in my windpipe. I shut up after all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 291

You deserved it 52 245

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 18/02/2013 19:11 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 092

You deserved it 40 037

By quietdown - 30/05/2009 19:50 - United States

Today, I began to choke on a large pill while my mom was in the room. Hoping that she would help me, I began to make a lot of noise. After she completely ignored me, I threw my body over a chair, saving my life. At this point my mother asks me to shut up because she can't hear her friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 039

You deserved it 4 759

By Anonymous - 29/01/2013 04:23 - United States - Lafayette Hill

Today, I almost died. How? I nearly suffocated after passing out while chewing an entire pack of gum. I should really drink less. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 593

You deserved it 46 288

By gumchuck - 05/02/2015 21:03 - United States - Marshall

Today, in an effort to avoid my school's strict no-gum policy as my teacher made a b-line to me, I swallowed it. By the time the teacher reached me, the gum was on my desk, as well as my breakfast, thanks to my overactive gag reflex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 851

You deserved it 16 307

By FGum - 30/07/2009 05:56 - United States

Today, I was running on a soccer field and accidentally dropped my gum from my mouth. No one had noticed so I picked it up and started chewing again. It was a different flavor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 466

You deserved it 87 848

Surprise!

By BAMashleyx3 - 06/06/2019 06:07

Today, my dad texted me while I was in the dentist's chair getting my teeth cleaned. The dental hygienist jumped at the notification sound my phone made and split my gum open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 902

You deserved it 671

By anonymous - 09/09/2012 06:15 - United States

Today, I tripped over my dog and landed on my face while trying to prove to my father that I can walk and chew gum at the same time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 301

You deserved it 26 032

Tasty

By I wish it was gum - 23/10/2018 12:00

Today, I was in the cinema making out with my girlfriend. I asked her if she could stop trying to pass me her gum because it was kinda gross. She replied, "It's not gum, I just have bronchitis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 049

You deserved it 683

By Bad at life - 18/10/2018 13:30

Today, I pulled a muscle in my face. Chewing gum. For the second time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 085

You deserved it 626

Noise annoys

By Breathy - 07/09/2022 00:00

Today, while sitting next to my mom at a restaurant, she told me to stop moving and making so much noise because, "It's distracting." The noise I was making was me breathing. I'm not even allowed to breathe. Guess I'll die. FML

I agree, your life sucks 989

You deserved it 150

nuked 0

Monday 28 December 2009 1:20

And why were you singing during a game? YDI for being a disrespectful idiot.

Malevise 0

Monday 28 December 2009 1:22

YDI for being annoying.

Comments

Arieah 17

Sunday 3 March 2013 13:43

You seem like you'd be not very fun to hang around... The type of person that gains amusement from pissing other people off. YDI kiddo.

xgardian 15

Monday 29 April 2013 2:07

Sing in your room.....? Children these days, I swear....

aliyahstars 7

Wednesday 16 July 2014 15:15

Your fault for being rude to your parents and yelling no

notrealfmls 1

Monday 29 December 2014 15:01

Ydi

Astrobomb 21

Tuesday 14 July 2015 4:39

Good. That's what you get for being disrespectful.

JHamm2121 15

Wednesday 16 September 2015 20:35

I hate you OP.

DickButt1 10

Monday 18 July 2016 0:52

I'm sure your parents regretted not getting the abortion now...

Keywords

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I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 211

Today, my grandpa was wearing flip flops and white socks. He entered my restroom, and the moment he did I remembered there was no toilet paper left. I felt too ashamed to interrupt his dump, so I waited for him to ask for paper; he never did, and came out without socks. FML

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You deserved it 5 799

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I agree, your life sucks 1 478

You deserved it 148

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I agree, your life sucks 1 050

You deserved it 82

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I agree, your life sucks 45 308

You deserved it 4 729

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I agree, your life sucks 1 417

You deserved it 583

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. I got a little too enthusiastic during it, and wound up cracking my neck loudly, and had to stop while the pain settled down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 215

You deserved it 24 091

Today, after dropping my phone in the toilet, I left it dismantled outside in my backyard to dry hoping it could be saved. I forgot about the phone as well as the sprinklers that were scheduled to go off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 635

You deserved it 3 982

Same thing different taste

Surprise!

Tasty

Noise annoys

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