Love: Today, I was sitting on the couch with my fiancé, when he jumped...

By anonymous - 14/03/2012 05:18 - Canada

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my fiancé, when he jumped up and viciously sat on my face. I then heard, smelled, and tasted the most violent, horrific fart known to man. I still can't get the taste out of my mouth, and he can't stop laughing. I'm getting married to this guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 061

You deserved it 14 188

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Same thing different taste

Love is in the air

By Rydia - 31/10/2020 05:01

Today, my fiancé hugged me so tight that I couldn't move, said he loved me, let out a loud, obnoxious and smelly fart cloud and made me breathe it in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 967

You deserved it 197

By byebyeromance - 26/08/2014 01:03 - United States - State College

Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 318

You deserved it 5 074

By DutchOven - 04/07/2009 21:07 - United States

Today, was my wedding. After eating, I had an urge to fart. I let one rip just before my husband and I were called to do the garter dance. He seductively tried to use his teeth to remove the garter and came out from under my dress dry heaving. I dutch ovened my husband in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 402

You deserved it 25 957

By LoveStruck- - 10/02/2010 07:29 - United States

Today, I hung out with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. We were cuddling on the couch when he suddenly stands up. I thought he was going to hug me, but then he turned around, pinned my shoulders back so I couldn't move, and farted in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 791

You deserved it 5 744

Nervous

By amelie - 09/12/2018 05:00

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. While getting down on one knee, he farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 729

You deserved it 715

By sydneybourgeois - 13/08/2011 04:06 - United States

Today, the guy of my dreams told me he liked me and leaned in to kiss me. Just as our lips touched, I ripped a big ass fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 523

You deserved it 16 149

Gas wars

By Ali - 04/10/2020 23:02

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time and we were alone. He was being super romantic and snuggling with me, and then out of nowhere he let out the biggest fart I've ever heard. He then explained how I should try to compete with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 124

You deserved it 386

Let it all out

By pottypattypeepants - 31/12/2009 20:04 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 686

You deserved it 19 646

The Taste of Love

By Anonymous - 05/04/2020 14:00

Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 494

You deserved it 318

By ThisIsMyLife - 04/06/2017 04:00

Today, while naked, my fiancée said there was something wrong with her butt. She turned around and I leaned in to look at it. She then farted in my face. On purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 565

You deserved it 1 620

pinkcrayola 0

Wednesday 14 March 2012 11:42

You're the one who picked him.

jellyD 1

Wednesday 14 March 2012 11:41

Best reason ever to dump the, pardon me please!, asshole!!!

Comments

Rick_E_Fresh 0

Wednesday 14 March 2012 23:27

if you're gonna marry this man you gotta learn to love and embrace his farts

linkinpark98 23

Wednesday 14 March 2012 23:35

This made me gag....

PistolWhiper93 0

Wednesday 14 March 2012 23:38

That's a keeper! ;)

zebralover23 14

Wednesday 14 March 2012 23:47

1 word: Immature.

phonefromhell 0

Thursday 15 March 2012 0:22

OMG you're getting married to him?! my opinion? he has the maturity of a 5 year old.

20th_century_fox 3

Thursday 15 March 2012 0:34

WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY?

xXcaraXx 2

Thursday 15 March 2012 0:58

R u still getting married to this man??

TheHeavyOne 15

Thursday 15 March 2012 0:58

That's a keeper.

kei1108 13

Thursday 15 March 2012 3:31

You don't have to...... I don't know him, But that's incredibly disrespectful...

br0ccoli 14

Thursday 15 March 2012 3:43

I would break off the wedding after that.

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The Top

Today, my husband and I were role playing to keep our marriage alive. His character was a deranged stalker while I was the helpless girl. My neighbor thought I was really being chased so she called the cops. Once they came we explained the whole story and got a fine for disturbing the peace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 940

You deserved it 7 937

Today, I called out "for personal reasons" from work because I had to study for a major test that's taking place tomorrow. An hour later, my manager called to fire me for "not taking work seriously." I then got an email telling me that the test was being postponed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 513

You deserved it 4 096

The Top

Today, my daughter's teacher called me, very concerned, because my child told the whole class she's not a virgin anymore. The word is "vegan", Honey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 634

You deserved it 4 216

Today, Christmas Eve, I told my wife she has three presents to choose from: one large, one small and one tiny. She immediately responded, "Is the tiny one in your pants?". FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 758

You deserved it 2 236

Today, I pretended to have a heart attack so my baby sister would know when to call 911. When I fell down and started to pretend, she drank my soda instead of helping me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 899

You deserved it 1 724

Today, my sister is working on her graduation speech. She gives her thanks to one friend for helping support her through school, like, "The sister I never had". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 304

You deserved it 4 541

Today, my father accused me of not taking care of my 15-month-old son, who is putting on weight slowly because of starting to walk and run. Come on, for a man who sees his grandchildren two or three times a year and never gives his daughter a call, who gave him the courage? FML

I agree, your life sucks 951

You deserved it 124

Today, I went in to pick my wedding dress. My fiancé's ex-girlfriend was my consultant. She basically hinted that I looked fat in every dress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 945