Health: Today, I was sucking on a Tic Tac. Just as I was starting to...

By DeepTaccer - 30/10/2010 21:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I was sucking on a Tic Tac. Just as I was starting to get into it, the Tic Tac suddenly shot down my throat. After a minute of coughing and gagging, it came back up… out my left nostril. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 109

You deserved it 6 290

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Same thing different taste

By bitter cherry - 29/09/2010 21:29 - United States

Today, I took a cough drop to soothe my sore throat, only to choke, gag, and spend the next ten minutes at the point of vomiting because the bitter lozenge got stuck in my windpipe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 124

You deserved it 3 747

By tictacnose - 08/01/2012 00:33 - Canada

Today, my sister attacked me and stuffed a Tic Tac up my nose. I'm currently in the hospital waiting to have it removed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 492

You deserved it 3 204

By Anonymous - 13/08/2009 07:24 - United States

Today, I was smoking a cigarette while watching the meteor shower. I was just about at the filter and as I was taking my last drag, my friend decided to scare me from behind, and I accidentally sucked the whole thing in my mouth. They don't go out immediately when in your mouth. My tongue hurts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 332

You deserved it 56 153

By Anonymous - 18/02/2013 19:11 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 092

You deserved it 40 037

But… why?

By Fmylife - 06/07/2011 09:17 - United States

Today, I have a cold. Trying to clear out my stuffy nose, I tried putting mouthwash in my nose. Thinking it was an awesome idea, I put some more in. I then starting screaming in pain due to the extreme burning in my nostrils. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 258

You deserved it 120 988

By asthmattack - 25/01/2013 06:30 - Australia - Mona Vale

Today, I was suffering from an asthma attack, so I grabbed my inhaler and took a puff. This was probably very disturbing for the earwig which had somehow made my puffer its home, as I discovered when it shot into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 319

You deserved it 2 816

Seduction technique

By BlueBirdWings - 06/03/2012 07:20 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 788

You deserved it 6 803

Sticky situation

By Anonymous - 05/12/2020 12:28 - Canada - Holyrood

Today, all was going fine until I had a tickle in my throat, which turned into a coughing fit. Only to cough for the last time and shart my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 883

You deserved it 148

By Snuffles - 24/04/2019 18:00

Today, while eating a BLT sandwich, I unexpectedly sneezed a lump of bacon up the back of my nose. It has just taken 6 hours of unpleasantness to snort the lump back out. Not how I wanted to spend my day off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 964

You deserved it 241

By zombielover1 - 13/07/2009 06:17 - United States

Today, while eating a Subway sandwich, I was watching a comedian on TV. As he said his signature line, I laughed hysterically and accidentally snorted a jalapeño into my nose. I spent the next 5 minutes trying to snort out the little piece that got lodged into my nostril. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 170

You deserved it 12 832

SooShee 0

Sunday 31 October 2010 2:16

Cool party trick!!

purplecowchik 5

Sunday 31 October 2010 2:20

I'm jealous.. I wish I could be cool enough to do that!!

Comments

Friaza 29

Sunday 31 October 2010 2:13

The left side of my face felt numb for half an hour while I blew my nose.

yuggi1 11

Sunday 31 October 2010 2:19

Now THAT is a true FML. :( Tissue?

shireeniee 8

Sunday 31 October 2010 2:21

haha

gingermaria10 0

Sunday 31 October 2010 2:27

Hahaha!! That's hilarious!

thrAsHeRr9081 16

Sunday 31 October 2010 2:28

I've had bacon come out through my sinuses before.... ouch.

weirdo2013 0

Sunday 31 October 2010 2:29

that should be on a tic tac commercial!!!

rockyraccoon28 8

Sunday 31 October 2010 3:30

"buy our product so you can choke yourself whenever you want!"

jetex97 1

Sunday 31 October 2010 2:34

I did this before but with pasta noodles.....

tiftif567 0

Sunday 31 October 2010 2:48

that made me LOL

slinky_29 2

Sunday 31 October 2010 2:58

this shouldn't be on fml. this sucks and so do you.

elmorous 0

Sunday 31 October 2010 3:01

Even if someone has bad breath, you will smell it as minty fresh. I see this as a win!

yuggi1 11

Sunday 31 October 2010 7:48

Your display picture fascinates me :). I meant the giant ****, mind you. :P

elmorous 0

Monday 1 November 2010 4:46

Why thanks. Everybody stares at my ****. We've learned to live with it.

Impulse97 0

Sunday 31 October 2010 3:03

OMFG LMFAO ******* hilarious.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I went to my room to find my girlfriend on the floor, butt up, with her pants down. I elatedly took the invitation and dropped my pants too, only for her to tell me, "Not so fast champ, I'm trying to force some farts out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 089

You deserved it 464

Today, I got back from a six month deployment overseas. My girlfriend of three years couldn't pick me up from the airport because she had an intramural softball game to go to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 791

You deserved it 6 439

The Top

Today, I woke up and stepped out of bed right into a pile of dog crap. Acting quickly, I jumped on to my other foot, which would have been a great idea, except for this morning there were two piles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 653

You deserved it 5 974

Today, I was working as a valet when an old guy came up and wanted us to park his car. He said he had an accident. We looked in the car and saw poop all over the seat. We still had to park the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 782

You deserved it 823

Today my boyfriend overeats when he is upset, and normally keeps tight hold of his diet to control his weight. He assures me he’s happy about it, but since I told him I’m pregnant 3 weeks ago, he’s put on 28 pounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 960

You deserved it 193

Today, I slipped on the wet floor at work and sprained my wrist badly. I was carrying the wet floor sign so no one would slip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 535

You deserved it 7 168

Today, I had to pee badly. I went into a stall and sat down. Only until after I'd peed, I realized that I didn't have any toilet paper. I waddled to the next stall with my pants down to get more toilet paper, believing that the bathroom was empty. It wasn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 129

You deserved it 53 797

Today, after the church service was over, my two year-old granddaughter started to sing into the microphone. She said, "Here Nana, you sing". I picked up the microphone and sang "Jesus Loves Me". She took the microphone back and said, "No he doesn't." FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 426

You deserved it 9 364

Same thing different taste

But… why?

Seduction technique

Sticky situation

Top comments

Comments