Kids: Today, I was talking to one of my British friends online, and...

By properpissed - 03/06/2014 15:36 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was talking to one of my British friends online, and he told me to say "yew anchors" a few times really fast. I'm a fairly stupid person, and wasn't very focused, so I did as he said. When I finally figured what the words meant, my dad had heard and grounded me for cursing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 432

You deserved it 10 165

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Same thing different taste

By libraries are a girl's best friend - 19/07/2013 21:53 - United States - Elizabethtown

Today, my dad grounded me for swearing, after I read a funny comment on Youtube to my sister. The supposed swear word? "YOLO." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 947

You deserved it 35 610

By bribreeeeeezyfreshhh - 06/12/2010 17:03 - United Kingdom

Today, my grandmother told me to say "sofa king retarded" really fast. Not only did it take me several attempts to figure out what it meant, I'm now grounded by my mother for having a foul mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 939

You deserved it 27 192

By dadyoureacunt - 21/09/2013 13:10 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my dad made a big show of sending me to my room and grounding me for a week. Not because he heard me cursing at my video game, but because I "swear like a little girl" and it embarrassed him in front of his friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 517

You deserved it 7 462

Proportional response

By Anonymous - 16/10/2020 16:58

Today, our house caught fire. While trying to help my mom get to safety, the word "fuck" accidentally escaped my mouth. Once we were safe, she said I was grounded for swearing. I'm 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 364

You deserved it 171

By gothchick201013 - 09/09/2016 18:43 - United States - Dayton

Today, my dog kept barking at the door, and I jokingly shouted, "Language!" My mom heard and grounded me for yelling at the dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 077

You deserved it 1 125

You OK hon?

By religiunatic - 13/12/2013 17:09 - Canada - Keswick

Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off". She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language". FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 820

You deserved it 3 127

Shook

By Spooked - 18/03/2024 18:00 - United States

Today, for the first time in my 20 years of life, I heard my dad unironically say the f-word. I was so shocked by it that I became became practically frozen for a full minute, which is not a very good thing to happen when you're at work, and your boss is watching you. FML

I agree, your life sucks 314

You deserved it 208

No cussing

By jdsksoapy - 30/03/2009 20:16 - United States

Today, my parents punished me and made me wash my mouth out with soap for cursing. I'm almost 19. I said the word "Hell". FML

I agree, your life sucks 211 156

You deserved it 35 023

By bigbro - 06/09/2016 08:05 - Australia - Southbank

Today, I was babysitting my 6-year-old brother and was playing Mario. When I won, he called me a cunt. I was in shock and asked him where he learnt the word. He said from me when I was driving. He then told my mum that I taught him a new word. Easy to say, I'm in big trouble. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 369

You deserved it 4 978

Alexa, play "You made me realise" by My Bloody Valentine

By singleandthankful - 23/02/2013 23:18 - United Kingdom - Beaconsfield

Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me out after I spelt "realised" with an S instead of a Z. It wouldn't have been so bad, if we weren't both British, if he hadn't called me an "illiterate idiot", and if he hadn't muttered "family of morons" when my mum backed me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 253

You deserved it 4 862

NeatNit 32

Wednesday 4 June 2014 2:12

#7, I don't know how to say this in a way that doesn't sound sarcastic, but THANK YOU! that would have taken me ages to figure out by myself.

OBTrice 15

Wednesday 4 June 2014 1:36

So is it pronounced you anchors because if so idk what the bad word is

Comments

albertozeta_fml 9

Wednesday 4 June 2014 11:14

Is that funny?

vikky538 28

Wednesday 4 June 2014 14:23

are you from Texas..it blends well with that word.. you father needs to relax a bit...just explain him the situation..

Kergami 18

Wednesday 4 June 2014 16:41

Alpha Kenny Body, but man for your dad to think WANKERS is a curse? Puhleeease.

_GaryTheSnail_ 3

Wednesday 4 June 2014 17:36

British people have stupid curse words...wanker??

Elendil_fml 10

Wednesday 4 June 2014 17:46

I've been saying "yew anchors" for 30 seconds now. It sounds like "you anchors" to me. I'm totally confused why someone would think this is cursing.

chuksnwali 34

Wednesday 4 June 2014 20:44

Yew anchors becomes you wankers people.

fictionaldiary 11

Wednesday 4 June 2014 17:47

Isn't that essentially like calling someone a "jerk"? How is that a curse word?

HellboundAlleee 4

Wednesday 4 June 2014 19:35

Bet you can't wait to move out on your own. There's a reason, right there, to NOT be a fundamentalist.

RayRey009 5

Wednesday 4 June 2014 20:06

One also ends up sayig "and curse you and curse you and curse you..."

PharmGirl14 8

Wednesday 4 June 2014 20:23

If you call yourself fairly stupid, then you aren't just fairly, you are VERY stupid. YDI.

ju1c3b0x 6

Wednesday 4 June 2014 22:47

Ben Dover

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my father seems to be having an affair. A used condom was carelessly left on his nightstand and my mother found it. She refuses to believe that my boyfriend and I are not responsible. As punishment I am "no longer allowed to see him." We're both 22 and live together in our own apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 341

You deserved it 3 360

Today, I went with my girlfriend to the mall. We were looking at jewellery in Zales and she came across the engagement rings. She looks at one and says, "Are you kidding me? That ring is hideous and it's the most expensive one here! Who the fuck would buy that?" Well, that would be me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 292

You deserved it 6 694

The Top

Today, I was sitting in a parked car. A woman was having difficulties maneuvering out. She honked the horn repeatedly for me to move, then looked me in the eye and called me a "f**king bitch", before driving off. I was in the passenger seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 987

You deserved it 3 202

Today, I went to the police station to find out if the tint on my new car's windshield was too dark. The officer took one look, told me that windshield tints are illegal in California, and ticketed me. So much for being honest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 208

You deserved it 9 712

Today, my neighbour threw a bucket of muddy water over the fence at us because he said we’d been noisy since 5 a.m., and he was sick of it. We were noisy getting ready for my wedding. The water hit me and all my bridesmaids in our dresses, since we were ready and waiting to get in the limo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 209

You deserved it 306

Today, my husband and I announced at a family get-together that I'm pregnant with our fourth child. My dad sighed, and spent the rest of the evening acting moody, and eventually muttering about how he'd raised a "damned broodmare." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 900

You deserved it 10 601

Today, I've managed to lock myself in my own bedroom. It won't open no matter what I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 538

You deserved it 380

Today, I'm closing on a house with my boyfriend of 9 years at the end of this week. We have plans to be engaged. When discussing what rooms would be what, he mentioned how one could be a nursery. I told him 9 years ago, and several other times, that I didn't want kids. Turns out he's been waiting for me to change my mind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 954

You deserved it 438