Love: Today, I was talking to the girl I've liked for 2 years. We were...

By thicklysettled - 20/07/2009 04:04 - United States

Today, I was talking to the girl I've liked for 2 years. We were assigned partners for a History project so we were going to work on it at my house. When she asked me for directions, I told her I lived on Woodcock Road. She yelled slapped me and stormed off. I was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 540

You deserved it 3 379

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By what did I do? - 15/10/2015 19:30 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She slapped me in the face, stormed out and won't answer my calls. What the hell? FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 342

You deserved it 2 560

By Anonymous - 01/11/2014 18:23 - United States - Cincinnati

Today, my girlfriend came over to my place unannounced. She slapped me in the face, said, "You son of a bitch." and stormed off. I have no idea what that was for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 857

You deserved it 5 521

By GDBeast - 09/01/2013 23:55 - United States

Today, a girl I've been talking to online for a while asked me if I wanted to meet her in person. Two hours of driving later, I end up at her house. When she opened the door, she screamed and called the cops on me. While detained, she called my phone asking why I never showed up today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 466

You deserved it 6 317

Negging

By f*ck - 02/05/2012 16:22 - United States

Today, I had a date with the girl I've been interested in for months. I'm pretty laid-back and casual with my friends, which backfired and caused the date to end with a slap, when I greeted her with a friendly "S'up, slut?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 315

You deserved it 98 422

Unloveable

By Anonymous - 16/01/2021 23:01

Today, I was paired up with a girl in my class for a project. She started crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 965

You deserved it 91

By Anonymous - 09/10/2018 03:00

Today, I was cuddling with the girl I've been seeing for the past few months. She was saying how much she liked me and how much I meant to her. Reciprocating those feelings, I asked her to be my girlfriend. It was a HARD no for her. Then she drove me an hour and a half home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 265

You deserved it 300

Wrong target

By footinmouth - 21/01/2009 23:15 - United States

Today, I was hitting on a girl who was getting ready to walk into the same class as me. We were waiting outside the room, so I told her that I'd heard the professor for the course was a total bitch. We walked into the room. I sat down at a desk. She stood behind the podium. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 917

You deserved it 38 834

By Anonymous - 01/06/2017 18:00 - Australia

Today, I'm a youth worker. I drove 7 hours to visit a teenage girl I have been working with, and who recently moved. Due to roadworks, it took me 2 hours longer than expected. When I arrived, she told me to fuck off and closed the door in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 173

You deserved it 548

By smooth - 21/11/2013 16:10 - United States

Today, a girl and I were flirting and it was going well. Feeling bold, I asked what she would do if I kissed her. She smiled flirtatiously and said "Why don't you try it and find out?" I went in for a kiss, and she slapped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 604

You deserved it 14 038

What the F, lady?

By Anonymous - 01/09/2012 00:49 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, the girl I went on an awkward date with two weeks ago showed up at university and started smashing my car with a bat. She then broke down in tears and alternated between declaring her love, and cussing me out for "cheating" on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 195

You deserved it 2 500

heyyou1203 0

Monday 20 July 2009 12:17

why do women think it's ok to slap men?? if a man slaps a woman it's abuse or domestic violence. (i'm a woman, btw)

Smiley_70 22

Monday 20 July 2009 12:05

Show her a street directory with the street on it. Weird name of a road though!

Comments

Crickmasta 0

Monday 20 July 2009 12:38

Woulda been funny if it was 69 Woodcock Rd.

iSmellNice 2

Monday 20 July 2009 17:39

That would be great!

cheksea 0

Monday 20 July 2009 19:57

69 Woodcock Rd exists! It is in Westbury, NY

Jerro893 0

Wednesday 23 September 2009 1:34

Aww, I was gonna say that. No fair, being here first! LOL!

iBimmer 0

Monday 20 July 2009 12:39

YDI for living on a road called Woodcock.

nirvan5a 1

Monday 20 July 2009 13:06

i live in Ironpussy street, seriuosly.

Antivirus_fml 0

Monday 20 July 2009 13:19

LOL!!!! HA HA HA HA (Thats not true, is it?)

Pastor_Rich 0

Monday 20 July 2009 13:10

if she lived around there, she would have heard of that road maybe, but still, a slap and walk off for that. she has issues

queenms 0

Monday 20 July 2009 13:21

LOL # 16 xD That's rly mean wtf... like if a guy/friend said that to me I'd either be like "uhh... ok sure xD" or like "HAHAHA ur so funny ^^ no btu seriously wut's the name we rly need to get working ;)" And then u'd be like uhh I'm seirous and I'd be like "ohhh I'm so stupid I'm sry ^^" I would NEVER slap a guy for that... I hit guys a lot but only because they annoy me all the time like once I was crying with my friend and one of my guy friends comes behind me and fake humps me im just like all pissed off n I slapped him rly hard ^^ Than of course I apologised... That's an exemple of a ok reason to hit a guy but seriously WTF is wrong with dat girl???? XD Btw sry i wrote so much ^^

trilliamme 0

Monday 20 July 2009 16:14

No, that's not an "okay reason to hit a guy." And damn, that took me a while to get through. Your spelling gives me a headache.

heyyou1203 0

Monday 20 July 2009 17:19

agreed #47. in ALL that you said. And 19, so your apology makes it ok in the end? so i can beat you up and apologize, maybe even pay for the medical bills if necessary, but it's ok because I said sorry? that's how so many women end up stuck in abusive relationships, FYI. if your friend "fake humps you" then push him off... don't hit him unless he's attacking you.

TheNewGuy03 28

Saturday 2 October 2010 19:05

i'm coming to **** you up permanently, but i'll be sure to apologize soon after! by your logic, i can get away with murder...if i apologize. |the kid|

11bellacasey 0

Monday 20 July 2009 13:26

woodcock? really?

Pixelle_fml 0

Monday 20 July 2009 13:26

Hmm there's something I didn't get there... What does that mean, why is it so funny?

ZuRG_fml 7

Monday 20 July 2009 15:10

Study partner thought it was a penis joke for a booty call instead of studying. It wasn't.

Pixelle_fml 0

Tuesday 21 July 2009 16:36

Oh got it now! Thank you :) Lol, I met a man whose last name was Woodcock last year....

capricaz 0

Monday 20 July 2009 13:28

That sounds too ridiculous to be true. Any normal girl would be like "Huh is that a joke?" or something. I guess if it is real then she's a psycho and you don't want her in your house anyway.

killinglights 0

Monday 20 July 2009 13:41

I think this either fake or an old tale, it's the middle of the summer so the person probably wouldn't be in school.

zidane312 0

Monday 20 July 2009 13:52

Good point, definitely BS

hecuva 0

Monday 20 July 2009 13:58

I know many people, including myself, who take classes through the summer, especially in university/college. It can cut out a full year doing this (depending on the length of your program). So it's very possible it isn't fake at all

zidane312 0

Monday 20 July 2009 14:07

Its possible these two are in college. Both points valid. And I hear the road actually exists. I will give OP credit as a legit FML. (Though the slap part is really lame!)

cthulhu1138 1

Monday 20 July 2009 14:42

All FMLs have to start with "Today", even if the incident happened earlier. For all we know this might have occurred in May.

iheartsnapple 0

Monday 20 July 2009 23:34

yeah, I've posted FML's that had happened a few days/weeks ago, but I didn't have enough characters to type out, "Today, actually a little while ago,..." or anything like that. Not all FMLs that are posted happened that day.