Intimacy: Today, I was the only cash register open at the local supermarket.... - FML

By Narehs - 13/01/2010 01:05 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was the only cash register open at the local supermarket. I had to sell condoms and chocolate frosting to my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 250

You deserved it 2 906

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Same thing different taste

By tammy - 27/06/2012 05:05 - United States - Inglewood

Spicy

Today, while cashiering at the drug store, I saw my ex-boyfriend, who I'm still completely in love with. Being the only cashier, I had to ring him up. He was buying condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 132

You deserved it 3 621

By ash - 18/05/2016 20:00 - United States - Winnebago

Today, I went shopping on my only day off. The only aisle open was self-checkout. I'm a cashier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 986

You deserved it 1 773

By yournick - 31/01/2011 21:23 - Canada

Spicy

Today, at my job as a cashier, a very old man came through my checkout. His purchase consisted of a box of condoms and a can of whipped cream. The creepy smile he gave me has scarred me for life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 255

You deserved it 4 834

Presumption

By fmlgrl - 30/07/2012 06:59 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I went to a corner store to restock my chocolate stash. A guy from work walked in to see me and the cashier arguing about the amount of candy I was trying to buy with a jar of pennies. He took one look at me and said, "That time of the month, eh?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 743

You deserved it 27 162

Make believe

By SN MetalMilitia - 03/11/2020 05:02

Spicy

Today, I once again bought condoms at the gas station to make the people who work there think that I have a sex life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 407

You deserved it 1 370

By useless pos - 01/03/2013 00:48 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I went out to buy a bottle of wine and some condoms. As the cashier scanned the condoms, she snickered and muttered, "Yeah right." She was right; I really was just desperate to look like I have a sex life. I got so upset that I left my items and walked out with tears in my eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 292

You deserved it 12 379

By Anonymous - 24/07/2013 20:56 - United States - South Hadley

Today, I was buying condoms but was a little embarrassed so I went to the self-check. I scanned the condoms, then a magazine and tried to put the condoms under the magazines to hide them. The store guy saw me, thought I was shoplifting and I was kicked out of the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 844

You deserved it 15 940

By rink.attendant.6 - 21/06/2012 15:40 - Canada - Dryden

Today, I saw my crush working the only open till at the grocery store. When she saw me approach her queue, she immediately called for more cashiers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 133

You deserved it 3 605

Some salt for that wound?

By Luissa - 03/07/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, my ex-husband’s new girlfriend stopped by the pharmacy I work at, checked out at my lane, and had me ring up her condoms. She kept bragging about how she’s gonna have “nasty freaky sex” with my ex all night long while I work at a “miserable pharmacy.” I burst into tears while she laughed and waltzed away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 701

You deserved it 159

By RahiYeah09 - 17/09/2009 18:45 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was in the 'intimacy' section of Walmart. After grabbing 2 boxes of condoms and a vibrating ring I turn around to see my ex boyfriend's mom. I smile awkwardly and put my head down as I walk away, causing me to colide with his dad and send my 'goodies' all over the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 280

You deserved it 7 193

Next

Top comments

DynamicDave 11

Wednesday 13 January 2010 9:26

Awkward turtle

firecopy 6

Wednesday 13 January 2010 14:09

yea and the condoms were for baloons!

Comments

VegHead13 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 1:04

Haha they prob did that on purpose to bug u.

DaleksAreEpic 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 1:21

This post seems suspiciously familiar.

axelkg 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 5:13

I'm sick of people like you #3. like seriously, what does it take to qualify for a real fml in your mind? it's like the only thing that would be okay is if the OP got hit by a train and died or something. lighten up.

daneeyoll 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 5:35

fail

sweetpea129 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 6:35

awwkwarddd. don't let it get to you though. I'm sure he did it on purpose,

roryrobotic 5

Thursday 14 January 2010 6:58

I agree with #31. People need to quit critiquing everything and shut up. Nobody gives a **** how intellectually challenged you are.

dance_and_alive 0

Thursday 14 January 2010 8:55

i know how this feels op. weather a fake or not, shit sucks real bad.

paladininwaiting 1

Thursday 14 January 2010 16:54

ok...where's the FML? Do you still love him,....or do you just miss the condoms and chocolate frosting?

suckmysarcasm 10

Thursday 14 January 2010 20:05

reminds me of that song sex and candy.

haydog12 0

Friday 15 January 2010 6:08

hahahahaha that sucks hardcore

Keywords

Miscellaneous Weddings Awkward Love My ex Jealousy Friends AITA Health Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Relatable Therapy Mental health Covid Argument Kids Parenting Thanksgiving Ironic Medication Cute Sports Proposal Snow Cold weather Annoying Cheating Money Work

The Top

Today, while at the restaurant I work at, a bunch of kids came in. They all gave incredibly complex orders, laughed at everything I did, and made a huge mess by "spilling" hot sauce and water all over the floor. After they left, I was tipped eleven cents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 306

You deserved it 3 563

Today, I learned that I actually like my boiled eggs a bit softer than I usually make them. I also learned that an outwardly lukewarm egg, when bitten into enthusiastically, is perfectly capable of creating a volcanic eruption of boiling hot yolk all over your hands, clothes and kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 645

You deserved it 413

The Top

Today, I was in the shower, when I heard my daughter scream and shout, "Mommy, mommy! Help! Come quick!" I panicked and rushed downstairs without even looking for a towel to cover myself, all so I could find out she'd just gotten a piece of dirt on her shoe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 769

You deserved it 2 902

Today, I spent all day cleaning for my grandparents to come over, only for my grandfather and father to interrupt me, talk over me, and treat me like I'd done something wrong. I'm autistic and was infodumping. They know this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 969

You deserved it 187

Today, I started my new job at a haunted house. I figured I'd change clothes when I got home, since my bloody shirt and zombie makeup were blatantly just an outfit. I barely made it 10 minutes before I was pinned to the ground at gunpoint, cuffed, and needing new underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 261

You deserved it 2 892

Today, during a class, I noticed some racist statements and symbols on a table. While erasing them, I bent down to pick up my dropped pencil. I look back up to see a teacher, and got a suspension. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 579

You deserved it 3 743

Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 742

You deserved it 23 092

Today, it appears that my girlfriend visited an internet web page called "How to confess to having an affair." FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 083

You deserved it 5 376