Health: Today, I was walking to the bus in my favorite jeans, and I felt...

By Rissa Warrington - 09/03/2012 08:30 - Canada

Today, I was walking to the bus in my favorite jeans, and I felt a uncontrollable itch in my leg. I scratched and it went away, but then I felt something moving on my leg. I hadn't worn my jeans in so long that a spider had decided to make it a nest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 838

You deserved it 4 709

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Same thing different taste

By spiderwoman - 04/11/2012 17:12 - Iceland - Reykjav

Today, while walking home, I really had to pee, so I decided to do my business in some high grass just off the street. When I got home, I felt an itch between my butt cheeks. I went to the bathroom to check it out, and a dead, apparently crushed spider fell out of my underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 726

You deserved it 13 576

By yuckspider - 20/04/2009 00:17 - United States

Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 326

You deserved it 7 654

Tasty snack

By spiderinmylips - 24/06/2009 20:19 - United States

Today, I was laying out in my backyard trying to get some color when I felt a little tickle on my lips. I rubbed them together to satisfy the itch, when I felt a sort of crunchiness popping between them. I had crushed a spider between my lips and its legs were still moving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 121

You deserved it 7 502

By dickwebs - 22/11/2010 03:42 - Germany

Today, I was taking off my underwear to change into fresh clothes. Pulling them down, I realize there's a big fat spider in them. Not only did I have a spider chilling with my genitals the whole day, but I'm deathly afraid of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 972

You deserved it 5 238

By somuchforthat - 19/02/2010 07:38 - Australia

Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 706

You deserved it 2 519

By OuchImAMoron - 29/11/2013 02:05 - United States - Old Bridge

Today, I was cleaning a pocketknife when I noticed a spider on my leg. My first reaction was to stab it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 459

You deserved it 46 724

By yesikilledit - 20/11/2018 13:30

Today, I woke up and saw a piece of black fuzz on my shirt. I tried to pick it off but it crawled into my hand and stabbed my skin with its sharp legs. I screamed like a little girl because I had a centipede on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 355

You deserved it 337

By all5fingers - 08/09/2011 05:23 - Canada

Today, I was playing my guitar and felt something like an itch under my foot, so I attempted to scratch it by rubbing against the floor. The big cockroach made a very distinct "crunch". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 628

You deserved it 3 246

Sticky situation

By Anonymous - 24/07/2022 06:00

Today, at work, I thought I had to fart, but didn’t trust it. I squeezed cheek and hurried to the bathroom. As I was sitting down, liquid shot out of my butthole and got on the seat. I then sat in it. On top of, that I saw a spider crawl out of my underwear. The spider bothers me more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 899

You deserved it 199

By Elgrin - 17/06/2016 18:03 - United States - Fort Worth

Today, I woke up to something crawling on my leg. Thinking it might be a spider, I jumped out frantically to check. The good news: it's not a spider. The bad news: it's a bedbug. My apartment was just treated for them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 890

You deserved it 1 437

allergylady101 0

Friday 9 March 2012 16:08

That just makes my skin crawl.

MeLuvBewbs 7

Friday 9 March 2012 16:08

You will be the next Spiderman!

Comments

neander 8

Friday 9 March 2012 20:19

favorite jeans not worn in a long time spider bites deserved

animefreak16 1

Friday 9 March 2012 20:28

This status makes me want to burn all my jeans O.o

TheFamilyElf 17

Friday 9 March 2012 20:32

*shivers...*

bubo_fml 10

Friday 9 March 2012 21:11

Barking spiders?

KilljoyParade 4

Friday 9 March 2012 21:29

If they were your "favorite jeans", why hadn't you worn them for so long?

LOLZ11 0

Friday 9 March 2012 21:56

Ing I'd actually have died. And cried. And wanted to rip my trousers off right there and then. That's horrible OP

soccerfan1993 8

Friday 9 March 2012 22:20

That's my worst fear!

InsanishDanish 10

Friday 9 March 2012 22:27

Ughhh I'm getting chills just reading this! FYL indeed.

cuddlebunny3548 11

Friday 9 March 2012 22:41

When did you find out it was a nest?

MigraineurOfLife 15

Friday 9 March 2012 22:56

OMG! Embarrassment be damned, pants would of came off right there! No joke! I hate spiders!

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The Top

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You deserved it 60 774

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I agree, your life sucks 38 545

You deserved it 2 795

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I agree, your life sucks 984

You deserved it 175

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I agree, your life sucks 22 738

You deserved it 1 752

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I agree, your life sucks 1 010

You deserved it 94

Today, my loyalty and regularity at my local pizza place were noticed. The delivery guy, when bringing yet another order, asked me if the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were living with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 436

You deserved it 94

Same thing different taste

Tasty snack

Sticky situation

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