Health: Today, I was working at a day care center. A 5 year old boy came...

By PiZzA_FaCe - 29/05/2009 21:09 - United States

Today, I was working at a day care center. A 5 year old boy came up to me telling me he wanted to eat my face. Confused, I asked him why. He said, "Because your face looks like pizza." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 337

You deserved it 5 279

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Same thing different taste

Reported

By maximumpower - 15/03/2009 01:46 - United States

Today, I was eating at a restaurant in town, when a small boy started looking at me. I simply smiled and went back to eating, only to hear out of the corner of my ear, "Daddy, why does that kid's face look like that"? He said it so loud, the three tables next to us turned and looked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 155

You deserved it 3 524

By mew - 25/10/2011 18:04 - Canada

Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 174

You deserved it 3 236

By Momo8612 - 21/04/2017 12:00

Today, while shopping for groceries, a small child pointed at my face and exclaimed : "DOGGIE!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 688

You deserved it 306

By downlowtooslow - 12/06/2009 04:49 - United States

Today, while eating with my kids at McDonalds, my son put his hand up and wanted me to give him a "high five." I went to give him a five, but he moved his hand at the last second and I ended up slapping him in the face. Now everyone there thinks I'm a child-beater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 655

You deserved it 6 873

By Phycheledic - 12/05/2016 10:22 - United States

Today, I was volunteering at the daycare in my area. When this one kid was leaving, he asked his mom, "Why is she so ugly?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 515

You deserved it 1 595

By Anonymous - 25/11/2013 19:47 - United States - Olive Branch

Today, I was at the grocery store, when a little boy looked up at me and asked if I was a prostitute. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 963

You deserved it 13 842

Leftovers

By Anonymous - 16/09/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I woke up to my cat licking my face. Cute, right? Turns out, she was licking the crumbs off my cheek from last night's pizza party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67

You deserved it 498

Ewwwww

By EwFace - 06/06/2009 16:23 - United States

Today, I was babysitting a little boy. I opened up a new bottle of bubbles and it was all goopy and gross so I said, "Eww!" The boy then asked, "What's "ew" mean?" I replied, "Something gross and yucky." Then he pointed at my face and say "Ew! Ew! Ewwww!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 616

You deserved it 8 908

Exhaustion

By Shell - 05/03/2009 07:14 - United States

Today, I was working at Chuck-E-Cheese. If that isn't enough, I was put in the mouse costume. Due to the disgusting hot smell and atmosphere in the costume, I fainted in front of a birthday party. I awoke to a little boy screaming who then kicked me in the face and ran. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 403

You deserved it 4 421

By notyouagain - 03/10/2010 07:40 - Australia

Today, I went over to my friend's house. Her 5 year old son answered the door and when he saw me said, 'oh great, it's YOU' and slammed the door in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 588

You deserved it 4 947

peacelovepugs 7

Monday 1 August 2011 6:34

acne.

hk_fml 9

Saturday 30 May 2009 1:39

Ohhhh man. That is so unfortunate.

Comments

xkonstantine125x 7

Saturday 30 May 2009 1:36

LMAO HAHAHAA FYL

danyfuckinheatle 0

Thursday 1 July 2010 7:16

FAGGG

Revalation 2

Sunday 24 July 2011 2:54

hehe :)

lexa1love 16

Friday 8 June 2012 16:20

Damn. I thought he was going to say that he had smoked bath salts.

lincolnkite 6

Thursday 25 April 2013 8:26

It happened before that lol

StuckZ 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 1:39

He was probably kidding. FYL anyway.

hk_fml 9

Saturday 30 May 2009 1:39

Ohhhh man. That is so unfortunate.

cutiepie111 3

Wednesday 15 February 2012 3:12

WHY ARE YOU RETARTED?

cutiepie111 3

Wednesday 15 February 2012 3:17

oops srry, I meant 2 comment on #4

naroushh 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 1:39

HOW CAN YOUR FACE LOOK LIKE A PIZZA ???????/ LOLLLLLL

peacelovepugs 7

Monday 1 August 2011 6:34

acne.

baydestrian_girl 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 1:42

Dayuumm! That's all bad!

anglcdvl89 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 1:42

YUMMY!

kayC7 0

Friday 6 August 2010 7:45

You shouldn't mentioned it has lots of gooey, melted cheese, too! Mm, mm good.

tehefyl 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 1:42

hahaa that sucks. protip: proactive kids say the darndest things though fyl

uhmfml 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 1:42

Is your face just THAT greasy???

redbluegreen 40

Saturday 30 May 2009 1:42

Is he referring to acne? That's the only logical thing I can think of. Or maybe your makeup sucks. This is funny though.

ionboy 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 1:43

LOL FYL

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Sleep Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Dogs Animals Teenagers Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

The Top

Today, my jobless husband wants to buy the latest iPhone. His current phone is in good condition, except that he has a 1000 apps on it slowing it down. We're also in deeply crushing debt from all his bad financial decisions from his severely loss-making business. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 169

You deserved it 182

Today, I brought home my new boyfriend, who happens to have an eyepatch. Despite repeatedly telling them not to, even threatening punishment, my daughters, ages 9 and 11, would not stop calling him "Cyclops." He’s mad at me for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 055

You deserved it 364

The Top

Today, I got my first university math midterm back. I did so bad that my teacher put a sadface on the first page. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 652

You deserved it 11 352

Today, I got home from hospital after being sent there for suicidal intentions because I'm poor, chronically ill and want out of my life. Five hours later, I was sent home after being given one Valium and a taxi ordered, that I had to pay for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 104

You deserved it 132

Today, we had two of our longest serving coworkers retire at the company I work at, and they hired two young prospects to replace them. The problem? They asked me to train them both for the next 4 months, cancelling my PTO in the process, and then I learned they were being paid nearly 20% more than I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 98

Today, my now ex genuinely thought I’d buy the idea that he hasn’t answered a call or text in five days because he thought the "government" was "tracking" him. When I refused to buy his excuse, he raged that I was a "trained sheep." He was actually shacked up with his married coworker at the beach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 165

You deserved it 117

Today, I regret ever deciding to ask out a younger man. I’m 27 and he’s 21. I’m worried about my career, he’s worried about his Xbox; I love my parents, he’s still rebelling against his like an emo teenager; I want romance, he likes to wobble my breasts while giggling, saying, “Boobies.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 478

You deserved it 1 938

Today, I cleaned my toilet. I had forgotten it was white. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 238

You deserved it 49 178

Same thing different taste

Reported

Leftovers

Ewwwww

Exhaustion

Top comments

Comments