Miscellaneous: Today, I watched my brother attempt to cook some eggs without... - FML

By Anonymous - 20/02/2014 10:01 - United Kingdom - Great Malvern

Today, I watched my brother attempt to cook some eggs without turning the gas on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 865

You deserved it 5 019

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Same thing different taste

Gordon says you SUCK

By James - 01/04/2020 17:00

Today, my sister was so bored during the lockdown that she let me attempt to cook an omelette without turning the stove on, just so she had something amusing to watch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 735

You deserved it 1 322

By Anonymous - 02/10/2018 05:00

Today, I found out you really can burn down a kitchen by boiling an egg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 474

You deserved it 840

Masterchef

By sarah4241 - 26/07/2015 21:04 - United Kingdom - Belfast

Today, I was making some scrambled eggs. I had the eggs in a pan, stirring for about ten minutes, before I realised that the eggs were cooking very slow. I tried to figure out what was wrong for another few minutes before my grandma pointed out to me that the oven wasn't turned on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 782

You deserved it 21 150

By Anonymous - 22/09/2017 23:15 - Croatia - Zagreb

Today, I decided to eat healthier. I started with making 2 eggs and burning down whole kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 323

You deserved it 822

Never say easy

By Anonymous - 25/06/2009 19:22 - United States

Today, I decided to make pancakes from scratch. I poured the batter in my Perfect Pancake pan. Then I told my brother who was watching, "This is so easy. Just watch." I burned 15 pancakes, including the one I dropped on the burner, which lit on fire, causing the alarm to go off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 437

You deserved it 53 490

By Anonymous - 11/01/2015 08:44

Today, my brother woke me up by trying to light my bed on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 945

You deserved it 2 841

Gordon Ramsey called, you're an idiot sandwich

By Anonymous - 30/04/2020 23:00

Today, I tried to make breakfast. I had everything cooking on the stove when I reached to turn on the faucet, only to find out that the head of the faucet was up the sleeve of my robe. After drying off, I went to serve my boyfriend his plate, but when I returned, the stove had caught fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 423

You deserved it 558

By Annon - 26/11/2011 11:38 - Australia

Today, the recycling bin caught fire. My little brother was "experimenting" with his magnifying glass, set an egg carton on fire and didn't realise you had to put it out before throwing it in the bin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 835

You deserved it 2 484

By francesa_loca - 14/10/2011 16:09 - Canada

Today, my father started drinking a little early. At some point, he got hungry and decided to boil eggs. He started a dozen, drank some more, and passed out on the couch. When I came home, all the water had boiled off and the eggs had exploded all over the kitchen. I'm still cleaning up the mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 966

You deserved it 2 524

By burned - 24/05/2009 13:44 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was cooking me dinner. He walked away and I decided to help by giving the pan of veggies a sautee flip. My boyfriend failed to mention that he had just pulled that pan out of a 500 degree oven. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 114

You deserved it 64 141

Next

Top comments

Wizardo 33

Thursday 20 February 2014 12:48

The fire is there just like the cooking skills you can't see, muggles.

pdp_fml 21

Thursday 20 February 2014 12:43

He should watch some you tube videos to learn how to cook.

Comments

JohnTheLad 13

Thursday 20 February 2014 15:38

The man makes his own fire. He needs no gas.

LoopyLuuLuu 7

Thursday 20 February 2014 21:03

Most guys I know make their own gas, and I just hope they don't have fire.

JohnTheLad 13

Friday 21 February 2014 3:18

Whoa, its unfortunate you are around these strange men.

taylor21398 14

Thursday 20 February 2014 15:56

Well at least you know he can never burn the house down.

buttcramp 21

Thursday 20 February 2014 16:02

was he just super tired trying to cook himself breakfast? or did he think he really knew what he was doing? lol

geminigirl88 4

Thursday 20 February 2014 16:03

Haha that's funny

Goblin182 26

Thursday 20 February 2014 16:30

Anyone can cook with heat.

XBurytheCastleX 25

Thursday 20 February 2014 16:42

Why is it FYL op? It's not you cooking... It's his food...

dakid87 10

Thursday 20 February 2014 16:42

Well, how do you like your eggs ?

PainOfDemise 11

Thursday 20 February 2014 17:05

How old is your brother? If he doesn't even know to turn the stove on, he's probably to young to be cooking.

fwongraven 10

Thursday 20 February 2014 17:19

I wouldn't be too sure, when my brother was 15 I witnessed him mashing some bread up with a knife. He genuinely could not make a sandwich.

Bondhi 0

Thursday 20 February 2014 18:35

That's called distraction, we've all been there. It's more a YDI since you wasted your own time watching him do it! It's not even really an FML since nothing happened to you. If this is the worst of your life, you've got it pretty good.

mzhaze 22

Thursday 20 February 2014 18:38

how is it a FYL moment and maybe you should have told him

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The Top

Today, while trying to sleep after a night shift, workers came to hook up city sewage service, firing up drills and shouting. An hour later, my child woke me up to tattle on her sister. Just as I was drifting to sleep yet again, the smoke alarm battery started chirping. I give up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 350

You deserved it 227

Today, I was at a wedding reception with loud music. A guy told me that his sister couldn't be there because she "went home to be with her boy." I said, "That's too bad, she's missing a great party." He paused and repeated, "She went home to be with her LORD." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 265

You deserved it 4 813

The Top

Today, I went to the school dentist for the yearly routine check. She took ages trying to clean out my teeth with the metal toothpick-thing, constantly hitting my gums. After half an hour of pain and spitting blood, she looks up and says, laughing: "Oh, I forgot to put my glasses on". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 772

You deserved it 2 728

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house, and she was tickling me. It got a bit rough, and she fell out of bed and hit the floor. Her parents, thinking we'd been fighting, burst into the room to see her holding her bloody nose. She didn't say anything while her dad kicked my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 016

You deserved it 7 504

Today, I was at a local chinese restaurant with two of my friends. We were laughing hysterically when my friend tells me to stop making her laugh because she was going to puke, naturally I kept egging it on. She puked all over the table and I was laughing so hard that I peed my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 777

You deserved it 66 978

Today, I've realized that I, an introvert who prefers to be in the comfort of my own home, now prefer to stay out of the house as much as possible, because the obnoxious behavioral issues of my disobedient pets are making my life miserable. Is this how you become a workaholic? FML

I agree, your life sucks 247

You deserved it 1 044

Today, I bought the only cat on Earth that doesn't like chasing after a laser dot. Goodbye, hours of sick, sick entertainment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 070

You deserved it 27 018

Today, I found out my friend swapped my girlfriend and probation officer's numbers in my phone. My girlfriend is wondering why I asked her permission to leave the country, and my probation officer said she can't wait to see me again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 026

You deserved it 4 391