Intimacy: Today, I went from a party where both of my girlfriends decided... - FML

By crushed dreams - 16/06/2011 06:20 - United States

Spicy

Today, I went from a party where both of my girlfriends decided to show, to a hospital bed with no girlfriends and a painful left testicle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 530

You deserved it 244 079

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Same thing different taste

Wrong place, wrong time

By Matthew - 10/03/2021 00:30

Today, I awoke with a swollen, painful testicle. I called the ambulance and went to the hospital. After they'd done an ultrasound, it's a bad infection. My nurse was someone I used to know and had a major crush on. She's responsible for checking my testicle every 20 minutes when she checks my heart rate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 155

You deserved it 132

By Anonymous - 10/07/2011 04:18 - United States

Spicy

Today, after finally sleeping with a girl for the first time in I don't know how long, at some point during sex she managed to completely crush my balls. I acted cool until she left, then I had to wake my parents up at 3 a.m. to take me to the hospital where I was diagnosed testicular bruising. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 837

You deserved it 8 206

By neveragain - 12/02/2016 19:10 - United Kingdom - Byfleet

Today, I ended up in the ER because I ruptured a testicle by accidentally sitting on it. Last time I ever go commando. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 593

You deserved it 4 651

Mah bawsac

By Anonymous - 12/07/2014 20:19 - United States - Indianapolis

Spicy

Today, I accidentally twisted my balls in my own underwear so badly that I had to be hospitalized. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 020

You deserved it 8 045

Ball Is Life

By Anonymous - 17/09/2018 12:00

Spicy

Today, my wife tried to be sexy by climbing on top of me wearing nothing but a thong. Unfortunately, her knee came down in just the wrong spot and I passed out instantly from the pain of my testicle rupturing. I'm in hospital now recovering from the removal surgery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 971

You deserved it 254

By suosi - 26/07/2015 17:55 - United States - Indianapolis

Today, the crush I've had for months finally came over to my place for the first time. It didn't last long however, as I suddenly had to go to the ER for severe testicular pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 109

You deserved it 2 156

By Anonymous - 11/08/2018 01:30

Today, I didn't see the cat in the bathroom before I took my pants down, and the beast tore open my ballsack. The doctor says I might lose my left testicle, depending on how the surgery goes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 851

You deserved it 356

Agony

By Ouch - 22/12/2021 22:59 - Netherlands

Spicy

Today, I had sex with a guy I really liked. His testicle spontaneous turned inside his sack and he blacked out from the pain. He peed my bed, and I had to rush him to the ER so they could turn it back. Had to explain to his family and doctors what happened. It was my first time meeting them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 136

You deserved it 210

By inpain - 20/11/2009 15:51 - United States

Today, I thought it would be funny to touch my girlfriend's back with my cold hands. She thought it would be funny to crush my left testicle with her knee as I was trying to fall asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 291

You deserved it 40 629

By Ballhugger - 06/12/2009 20:42 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I fell asleep with my hands down my pants. I woke up to an excruciating pain coming from my genitalea. It turns out that I was having nightmares and I squeezed my balls because I was so terrified. I popped 3 blood vessels in my scrotum and now walk with a limp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 579

You deserved it 11 162

Next

Top comments

DjeePee 24

Thursday 16 June 2011 15:57

You totally deserved it. There is nothing more to be said. Hopefully you'll now have learned the importance of words like 'respect', 'loyalty', 'love' and 'peoplewhocheatdeservetobekickedintheballs'.

tintin1 0

Thursday 16 June 2011 15:56

Next time, don't cheat. Idiot.

Comments

roobin302 0

Thursday 16 June 2011 20:00

john tucker must die..

miniluda12 12

Thursday 16 June 2011 20:03

255 people also have a painful left ********.

tabasc0drumz 0

Thursday 16 June 2011 20:06

karmas a bitch, right?

redfaction 0

Thursday 16 June 2011 20:10

ydi its very messed to be with two ladys.... no respect or trust... love is not a thing to be tampered with.. you deserve to get your mili meter peter run over by a car. and then some.

pepsilove_fml 4

Thursday 16 June 2011 20:15

wow u ass!!! u totallyyy deserved it!!

razzledazzle21 23

Thursday 16 June 2011 20:17

douchebag. you deserve worse.

noaige 6

Thursday 16 June 2011 20:23

don't ******* cheat, dick. you deserved. too bad both your testicles aren't in your chest cavity right now cause that's what you deserve.

shadows17 0

Thursday 16 June 2011 20:23

u deserve it for being an idiot.

MagicMarker 0

Thursday 16 June 2011 20:24

HAHAHAHA. You deserve it a million times over. Ah, sweet comeuppance.

dmcp77 1

Thursday 16 June 2011 20:38

buddy YDI. just be happy your only in some pain with both testicles still attached. they could have done more damage than that.

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 372

You deserved it 76

Today, I had to explain to my mother that a lace mini-dress with an obscene amount of cleavage was not appropriate to wear while meeting my boyfriend's parents. She called me an "annoying prude" and said that with my attitude, I don't deserve to have a man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 317

You deserved it 4 940

The Top

Today, I counted how many medications I'm on: 14. I'm waiting to see another specialist who might put me on 2 more. I'm currently on more medications than my grandmother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 086

You deserved it 201

Today, I saw my crush standing at the bus stop. I did the "I'm talking to someone on the phone thing," trying to be cool. Halfway through the conversation my phone actually rang, I quickly answered but it was my mom on loudspeaker yelling, "Did you bring your tampons?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 118

You deserved it 40 788

Today, I went over to my neighbours' to politely complain about their dog, which had been barking non-stop for hours. This issue has been going on for months, and I finally decided today, of all days, was the day to resolve it. When I got there, they'd just got home from giving birth at the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 330

You deserved it 3 946

Today, I bought my first iPhone. Today, I broke my first iPhone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 173

You deserved it 26 234

Today, I spent my last day at the hospital for a long epilepsy test. Apparently, I don't have epilepsy at all, but I do have extreme stress. This means that I've been taking several anti-seizure medications that ruined my college plans and made me sick for half a year, all for nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 169

You deserved it 4 584

Today, while buying laxatives at a store, the cashier loudly declared that I'm "too pretty" to be constipated. What? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 048

You deserved it 115