Health: Today, I went to the OBGYN for my annual, and noticed they now...

By Anonymous - 08/01/2011 03:09 - United States

Today, I went to the OBGYN for my annual, and noticed they now supplied babywipes. After 3 seconds of "cleaning", the intense burning started. Turns out they were antibacterial bleach wipes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 053

You deserved it 32 410

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Same thing different taste

Happy Easter!

By Dummy - 01/04/2018 15:00

Today, I was stuck in the bathroom with no toilet paper in a family member’s house. I looked around and found baby wipes. I was saved! Unfortunately, they were actually Clorox wipes. The bleach gave me a chemical burn in my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 745

You deserved it 1 436

Ring of fire

By Anonymous - 29/12/2020 20:01

Today, after a particularly nasty shit, I decided to do one extra pass with a diaper wipe. What I didn't realize was that my wife had refilled the normal container with a pack of Clorox wipes by mistake. My asshole has never burned so fiercely in my 30+ years of life as it did in those following moments. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 461

You deserved it 206

By Anonymous - 27/01/2012 22:03 - United States

Today, I had to make a doctor's appointment for my daughter. Apparently she thought it would be better to wipe herself with Clorox tough scrub disinfecting wipes than tell me she'd caught an STD. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 138

You deserved it 3 937

Ring of fire

By Anonymous - 20/08/2022 12:00

Today, I did a big shit at work and found there was no toilet paper. I had to wipe my ass with disinfectant toilet seat wipes. It burns so bad, I can almost taste it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 744

You deserved it 289

Red alert

By nobleach - 02/07/2009 14:05 - United States

Today, I was going to bleach my bikini line, as I have not been able to shave there due to some ingrown hairs, and I also have to lifeguard every day. As it turns out, I'm allergic to the bleach. There is now an angry red, burning rash on my crotch that you can see around my swimsuit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 644

You deserved it 13 970

Kills 99% of all bacteria

By Anonymous - 17/02/2022 22:00

Today, I was so tired this morning when I went to take a dump and instead of using a baby wipe, I used a Lysol wipe. Guess I don’t have Covid up my butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 697

You deserved it 378

Stiff upper lip

By StomachofTinfoil - 24/11/2014 01:59 - United States - Bar Harbor

Today, I was elected to learn how to clean the birthing tub at the hospital I work at. Today, I also discovered that while blood doesn't bother me, floating chunks of afterbirth and god knows what else, will cause me to projectile vomit into said tub. Which I still had to clean afterwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 310

You deserved it 3 603

By lanikai610 - 26/10/2011 18:35 - United States

Today, there was no toilet paper left, so I asked my grandmother if I could use her Kleenex tissues. I found out too late that they were Vicks VapoRub tissues. My crotch has been burning for the last half hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 383

You deserved it 7 615

Surprise!

By Anonymous - 12/10/2022 02:00

Today, at nine months pregnant, I stopped at a truckstop to use the restroom. I opened an unlocked stall door and stood face to face with a woman bent over wiping. She let out a scream so blood-curdlingly loud, that I wet myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 871

You deserved it 125

Fire in the hole!

By CarrieBerrie - 14/08/2020 17:01

Today, after being woken up with the intense urge to go to the bathroom, and having gone to the bathroom three times in the last hour, I finally realized I took two laxatives instead of two Midol. My ass is on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 324

You deserved it 520

MadPercussion 0

Saturday 8 January 2011 8:30

Label reading can be a useful skill.

THEmuffinpan 0

Saturday 8 January 2011 10:48

A series of three periods is called and "ellipses", and is a proper use of punctuation. L2 grammar Nazi nub.

Comments

saleha97 4

Saturday 8 January 2011 10:43

ouch!

sAnChEz_98 0

Saturday 8 January 2011 11:12

Well in your defense, doctors offices are not supposed to have their cleaning agents in view of their patients. Still, you should have read the label.

Sparkadelic 4

Saturday 8 January 2011 11:16

While you're there you should get your tubes tied. People of your intelligence shouldn't breed.

Stephaline19 0

Saturday 8 January 2011 11:36

Wow, that sucks!

thisgirl2u 9

Saturday 8 January 2011 11:48

This is super gross. Just the mentioning of "burning" while "cleaning" lady parts has made my stomach turn. >;(

mikemik22 0

Saturday 8 January 2011 12:00

sounds awesome

BisFitty 7

Saturday 8 January 2011 13:15

BAZINGA! He's been running around as a fail ass grammar Nazi this morning.

kindlystfupls 0

Saturday 8 January 2011 13:42

YDI for stealing supplies from the doctor and having a dirty twat! lol

rachaelpeanut 0

Sunday 9 January 2011 14:53

uhh . she obviously didn't have a 'dirty twat' she was cleaning off the ky gel they use during the speculum exam. you're fat :)

5t3ff1k4h 44

Monday 10 January 2011 5:07

57 - Nowhere does it imply she has a dirty twat. 77 - Was it really necessary to insult her looks? Let me answer that for you. No. My guess is, either she was cleaning off the gel or wanted to freshen up, which still doesn't mean she had a "dirty twat". Either way, it's clean now!