Money: Today, I won $5000 dollars from a lottery ticket and tried giving...

By Noname - 19/01/2009 10:26 - Canada

Today, I won $5000 dollars from a lottery ticket and tried giving the man next to me a high five. He had no hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 198

You deserved it 10 022

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Same thing different taste

By steveinnewsoh - 18/01/2009 19:12 - United States

Today, I went to get a scratch off lottery ticket, and the dude in front of me got the same one I was going to get. He won 500 dollars. I got 2 bucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 002

You deserved it 2 957

By Anonymous - 11/10/2010 09:07 - Canada

Today, I scratched a lottery ticket I had gotten for my birthday and won $10,000. In celebration, I jumped up and raised my hands directly into a ceiling fan. Oh, and it was a fake ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 384

You deserved it 6 088

By Anonymous - 08/02/2013 00:28 - Canada - Hagersville

Today, I won $50 on the lottery. On the subway home, I checked my pocket to see if the money was still there. A very professional man in a suit yelled, "Hey, that's mine!" I got several dirty glares. I'm such a pathetic wimp that I gave him the money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 424

You deserved it 55 985

By AJShow80 - 13/04/2009 08:51 - United States

Today, I won 20 dollars on a lotto scratch off. My friend, pissed, makes me split the money, saying it was collateral for the gas money used to get us there. He then used his 10 dollars on a scratch off, and won 500 dollars. The jackass wouldn't split it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 123 260

You deserved it 18 234

By Anonymous - 11/04/2009 16:13 - United States

Today, my Dad called me to tell me that he had finally won the lottery and that I no longer had to worry about trying to find a way to pay for school. I was so excited I started crying. He then told me that he won $5 on a scratch off lotto ticket. He bought a sandwich. Funny dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 460

You deserved it 9 165

By BigMoney - 07/09/2011 17:25 - United States

Today, behind a cabinet, I found a scratch-off lottery ticket I hadn't scratched yet. After scratching it off, I realized it's a $2,500 winner. The lottery commission won't accept it because they stopped using that game 2 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 466

You deserved it 13 585

By anonymous - 17/05/2011 17:34 - United States

Today, I won the lottery. My ex-girlfriend has the ticket. I just broke up with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 811

You deserved it 28 403

By Dora - 12/10/2009 13:21 - Canada

Today, I won 10,555 dollars on scratch cards! My sister got me to do a happy dance and filmed it. The video is on facebook and the tickets were fake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 272

You deserved it 7 989

By SwingingChili - 27/10/2015 05:49

Today, to prove a point to my brother that playing the lotto isn't a sure thing. I got a $10 scratcher. Thinking I'd get nothing or maybe just another scratcher, I ended up winning a free scratcher plus $100. The second scratcher I got an additional $50. Now he's even more confident to win every time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 654

You deserved it 4 653

Sorry Sharon

By Anonymous - 25/02/2023 16:00

Today, I tried to high-five someone but somehow ended up slapping them in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 635

You deserved it 239

mellowyellowww 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 20:31

i hope you gave him the money to buy himself some hands. but i bet you didn't. selfish.

cbahh 0

Friday 20 February 2009 4:36

This made me laugh for 3 whole minutes.

Comments

convict617 0

Thursday 12 March 2009 23:37

Why is this FYL?? You have $5000 AND hands.

gukinator 0

Tuesday 17 March 2009 6:48

clearly this entire thread is made of /b/tards cuz normal people feel bad at a situation like that

Stormy_2021 0

Wednesday 18 March 2009 0:13

"Oh **** me! Oh, I made a small social faux pas with a person I never have to meet with or interact with again! Damn me and my terrible luck. I wish I had never been cursed with this free money."

Young_Sparta 0

Tuesday 14 July 2009 5:09

dude, please be my best friend. lmao

Rach_star 0

Monday 24 August 2009 18:38

lmfao!!

Enoch134 0

Tuesday 2 February 2010 15:13

epic

inlimbo11 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 22:30

bullshit. fyl for making up something this stupid.

elisabeth96 0

Friday 20 March 2009 0:46

wtf. you just won 5 grand AND there's someone physically less fortunate than you. how is your life screwed up in any way? go **** yourself.

lmfp 0

Saturday 21 March 2009 9:41

stormy_2021, i think i love you.

candy_babe34 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 0:09

woooow how is that an FML? if anything its a f HIS life.. dumbass

mellowyellowww 0

Saturday 28 March 2009 20:31

i hope you gave him the money to buy himself some hands. but i bet you didn't. selfish.

Goatsonaboat 0

Friday 12 February 2010 6:25

ahahhah nice

devondv 5

Tuesday 31 March 2009 5:08

Funny and congrats man.

SpencerLind 0

Wednesday 1 April 2009 23:18

Ha d00d i just pissed my self laughing I could see that happing

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Today, I finally got my paycheck from working at my minimum wage job for the last three months. I was delighted when I saw it was worth $846. On my way to cash it, I destroyed my car's suspension. It's going to cost almost $800 to fix. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 981

You deserved it 6 718

Today, I’ve been getting a lot of strange messages from guys on the dating site I use, then I realised why: on my profile pic I'm sat down and you can see my nice underwear up my skirt. That explains the messages, they thought I was trolling for men to hump and dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 417

You deserved it 979

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on. At one point, he started to kiss my ear. Then, he stopped, went into the bathroom, and came out with about four Q-tips. He then said to me, "Just take care of your ears, then I'll continue." FML

I agree, your life sucks 871

You deserved it 2 068

Today, my kids and I starved during the holidays because of the incompetent case workers at the food stamp office. I was denied because according to them, I make $1200 a week of unemployment. They put what I make monthly as weekly on their end. Their apology? “Sorry, you have to apply again.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 650

You deserved it 240

Today, my boyfriend and my sugar daddy found about each other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 546

You deserved it 6 487

Today, I stayed with a friend because I was recently kicked out of my home and had nowhere to go. When I went out for job applications, she asked, "Can you pick me up a pack of smokes?" and then got mad that I didn't have the money, calling me selfish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 785

You deserved it 328

Today, my boyfriend refused to take me out on our three year anniversary because he was busy, "training to become a professional gamer." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 810

You deserved it 8 653

Today, my body can do wondrous things, like turn bread into blubber, produce pimples and wrinkles on top of each other, but still hasn't mastered the basic principles: using sleep for recharging and turning food into energy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 799

You deserved it 155

Same thing different taste

Sorry Sharon

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