Intimacy: Today, my 18-year-old son asked me if I was a virgin. I still...

By blegh - 27/12/2011 21:50 - United Kingdom

Today, my 18-year-old son asked me if I was a virgin. I still don't know what to say to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 138

You deserved it 8 882

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Same thing different taste

By fucked by sex ed - 29/03/2013 17:18 - United States - Manchester

Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 876

You deserved it 17 014

Uptight girl, she's been living in her uptight world…

By TheVirginJenny - 07/10/2012 00:05 - United States - Spanaway

Today, my teenage daughter asked me how old I was when I lost my virginity. I sarcastically replied that I'm still a virgin. She looked at me blankly and said, "Jeez, no wonder you're so uptight. You need to get laid, mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 287

You deserved it 7 889

Admit it

By aces10 - 25/01/2009 13:52 - United States

Today, I was talking to my mom about my younger brother getting his girlfriend pregnant. She asked me how old I was when I first had sex. I'm a 21 year-old virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 277

You deserved it 5 606

Little shit

By Anonymous - 12/12/2021 16:58

Today, while at a family reunion, I jokingly asked my 18-year-old son, "When are you and your girlfriend going to give me a grandson?" He then retorted, "When are you going to die?" I was unable to answer at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 424

You deserved it 1 707

Early start

By KoNi - 21/11/2008 07:23 - France

Today, my 14-year-old sister asked me how I felt when I first had sexual intercourse. I told her it was personal and was none of her business. She then looked at me and said, "I thought it was nice." I'm 19 and I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 318

You deserved it 6 472

By Anonymous - 10/07/2013 16:38 - United States - Spencer

Today, my 15-year-old birth daughter asked if I've ever had sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 482

You deserved it 8 345

My kid, the playa

By baldiesmom - 29/08/2021 08:01

Today, I learned that my 18-year-old son has had more sexual partners together at one time than I've had separately in total in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 178

You deserved it 222

By Anonymous - 11/01/2012 20:08 - United Arab Emirates

Today, my 18 year old son asked me to check if there were any monsters under his bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 358

You deserved it 7 501

Soon…

By Anonymous - 03/05/2021 17:01

Today, my 16 year-old nephew gave me advice on how to get laid. At age 30, I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 112

You deserved it 310

Sex ed 101

By clapping_for_you - 14/12/2018 12:30

Today, during a private discussion, my teenage son confessed to me he finally lost his virginity several weeks ago. Why did he confess? He came to me to ask why it all of a sudden hurts when he pees, and asked if it could have anything to do with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 302

You deserved it 401

ddinspire6 10

Wednesday 28 December 2011 8:45

Say yes.

dpope06 0

Wednesday 28 December 2011 8:47

guessing no one had the "talk" with him. lol fyl and your sons

Comments

Sab0026 0

Wednesday 28 December 2011 18:21

Lol totally say yes!

BrittBritt1355 9

Wednesday 28 December 2011 18:22

Ewwwww wtf

Epic_Times 10

Wednesday 28 December 2011 18:51

Say yes OP, then tell him you found him under a mushroom.

Lintu_26 23

Wednesday 28 December 2011 19:12

"We found you under the mushroom" will be the new "the stork bought you here" :P haha!

psetterl 0

Wednesday 28 December 2011 19:20

tell him yes he is adopted and your thinking of returning him.

JaysFanStu 3

Wednesday 28 December 2011 19:52

No child left behind, eh?

millionz4184 2

Wednesday 28 December 2011 19:58

It's ur fault that he asked the question in the first place. He's 18. U were lazy in not telling him about sex. U deserved it!!

Mr_S3xypants 2

Wednesday 28 December 2011 20:15

That may be the best FML ever.

neander 8

Wednesday 28 December 2011 20:16

Tell him yes, and he should get his shit together because in 15 years or so they are going to nail his ass to a cross.

ArielleLeigh 5

Wednesday 28 December 2011 20:22

ithink your supposed tew tell him no :)

Namenlos_fml 20

Wednesday 28 December 2011 20:22

Try this one on for size: YOU'RE A MORON

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The Top

Today, I was on a date, everything was charming and fun, so I went in for a kiss. She turned her head at the last second, and I ended up kissing her ear. We both went on to pretend that it didn’t happen, but the silence was deafening. FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 102

Today, I jokingly asked my husband if he was going to make it to our first child's christening as there was a football match on at the same time. Without hesitating, he replied that he would just watch the recording. He meant the recording of the christening. He was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 500

You deserved it 6 397

The Top

Today, I was diagnosed with chronic vomiting. I've gone to 7 doctors and tried 13 different medicines, with none of them working. I've gone to therapy and taken up yoga with no change. So apparently, throwing up daily at random times is the new normal for me. Yay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 760

You deserved it 1 212

Today, I found out my dog is a felon. He broke into a neighbor's house by breaking in through the screen door. He also vandalized their property by shitting on their carpet. Our neighbors are now considering suing us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 623

You deserved it 557

Today, I won a goldfish at the amusement park. My little brother took him out of the bowl because he thought he was drowning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 407

You deserved it 3 624

Today, I finally went on a date with my crush. When he kissed me goodnight, it made me think of a dying slug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 832

You deserved it 7 270

Today, I had to go to the police station after my son got arrested for shoplifting 15 packs of gum. He got away with it at first, but got busted when he tried to return it all because he "didn't like the flavor". FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 300

You deserved it 8 968

Today, I was at my Muay Thai class. We were doing a combination which consisted of a low kick, body kick and head kick. My partner had already done the low kick so I held the pads for the body kick. He kicked me straight in the jaw. I'm a teenage girl and he's a fully grown man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 275

You deserved it 3 807