Intimacy: Today, my 18 year old son learned that just because his girlfriend...

By erphy21 - 26/09/2015 20:44 - United States - Lompoc

Today, my 18 year old son learned that just because his girlfriend was on top doesn't mean gravity will prevent her from becoming pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 067

You deserved it 6 293

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Same thing different taste

Bad student at the school of life

By Anonymous - 26/03/2023 00:00

Today, despite spending literal years educating my son about safe sex and warning him not to do something stupid like get a girl pregnant at 16, he actually surpassed my expectations. He got her pregnant at 17. Plus she gave him a nasty STD. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 390

You deserved it 237

By Anonymous - 22/10/2014 16:09 - Norway - Egersund

Today, my 17-year-old son managed to easily convince my 13-year-old daughter that if you have sex before getting married, you'll instantly get horrible diseases that will kill you. Her freaking out is how I found out she's not only gullible as hell, but sexually active as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 308

You deserved it 6 063

By fucked by sex ed - 29/03/2013 17:18 - United States - Manchester

Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 878

You deserved it 17 014

By SadMother - 04/10/2014 19:52 - United States - South Windsor

Today, I overheard my daughter talking to her boyfriend over the phone about having sex. She said, "You have to piss on me to get me pregnant, that's what I heard anyway." She's 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 896

You deserved it 11 952

Noob

By Anonymous - 11/05/2015 17:08 - Denmark - Randers

Today, my 18-year-old boyfriend freaked out and kept asking me if I was sure I wouldn't get pregnant, because I forgot to take my birth control pill last night. We didn't actually have sex; he apparently thought me simply missing the pill would magically get me pregnant. The hell? FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 882

You deserved it 6 050

By Anonymous - 17/12/2013 21:57 - Egypt

Today, my teenage daughter found out that she's pregnant, but insists she's still a virgin. Who does she think knocked her up? God? FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 141

You deserved it 7 777

Sex Ed is broken

By asnolt - 24/05/2011 22:29 - United States

Today, I had to explain to my sobbing teenage daughter why you can't get pregnant from masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 713

You deserved it 9 376

By Anonymous - 04/10/2012 15:17 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, I yet again had to explain to my boyfriend that, yes, I can get pregnant even if I don't actually have an orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 049

You deserved it 4 241

My kid, the playa

By baldiesmom - 29/08/2021 08:01

Today, I learned that my 18-year-old son has had more sexual partners together at one time than I've had separately in total in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 180

You deserved it 222

By Anonymous - 04/05/2016 14:15 - United Kingdom - Saint Austell

Today, I found out that my daughter not only has a boyfriend, but that they're trying for a baby. She's barely 15. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 773

You deserved it 2 879

zharks1010 18

Sunday 27 September 2015 15:29

Your son is a dumbass

pokemyeyes 23

Sunday 27 September 2015 15:30

#facepalm

Comments

fmlrulesBolt 14

Monday 28 September 2015 8:18

What the? What nonsense!! He should not be able to breed

mwali02 32

Monday 28 September 2015 8:31

Should we be congratulating you for being a soon to be grandparent?

Zebediabolical 39

Monday 28 September 2015 9:51

If only comprehensive and factually accurate sex ed were mandatory in the schooling system...

jenninyc1128 17

Monday 28 September 2015 15:44

Sex Ed has really been going downhill oh man..

remometol 16

Monday 28 September 2015 19:47

Oh god, it's multiplying

iadtgrad07 6

Monday 28 September 2015 23:37

your fault. maybe you should've given him the talk a long time ago...

cynthianicole95 9

Monday 28 September 2015 23:44

I'm voting YDI because he should have been educated on this subject.

quazimozart 19

Tuesday 29 September 2015 4:22

Morning after pill?

Mpii 11

Tuesday 29 September 2015 14:40

Did he learn it the hard way???

DavidKnows 11

Tuesday 29 September 2015 16:12

And STILL some parents believe sex education should not be taught in schools.

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Okaeri! I hope you had a great week out in the cold (most of our southern hemisphere friends don't know what they're missing). Personally, since I discovered this website I couldn't have been better. This week we're welcoming an atypical artist sinc...

I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 11

Today, thinking no one was home, I decided to be a little frisky with my boyfriend. I guess I was being loud and woke up my sleeping autistic brother the room over. Halfway through, he burst through the door, panicking. He thought I was having another one of my asthma attacks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 981

You deserved it 9 781

The Top

Today, a friend and I were walking around a festival when out of nowhere a giant bug hit me in the face. I went into instant ninja mode, screaming and flailing. When I stopped, I realized it was just a leaf and everyone was staring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 071

You deserved it 17 884

Today, my friend posted my picture on Craigslist under the "men seeking men" section. I got 16 replies with 2 hours. He then decided to post another picture of me under "men seeking women" to compare results. The only reply I got was from a man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 762

You deserved it 4 160

Today, I met the "cute guy" I've been chatting with online for a few months. He never smiled in pics, but I didn't think anything of it until I got to his place and he started talking. He didn't have a single tooth in his mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 848

You deserved it 598

Today, I had to hide some Oreos inside my bra to motivate my husband to get close to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 205

You deserved it 1 874

Today, I visited my new doctor for the migraines I've been getting lately. Right from the start, I could have sworn the guy was on drugs. He just listened to my heartbeat, said, "Well Dave, it sounds like gallstones" and said they'll pass naturally. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 679

You deserved it 1 935

Today, while making love to my wife, I let slip her sister's name. I don't think it would calm her down much if I told the truth: I was actually thinking of an ex girlfriend who shares the same name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 363

You deserved it 67 534