By cthulhu help me - 01/03/2013 18:22 - United States - Cabot

Today, my boss gave me the task of firing a recently-hired coworker next Friday. This guy spends most of his off-hours working out, probably abusing the fuck out of steroids, and to whom prison is like a bed-and-breakfast. I fear for my life by this point. FML
I agree, your life sucks 32 665
You deserved it 2 829
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Top comments

HandaPitler 1

Write him a note and sign it with your bosses name

132 0
ShannyAK 16

I get why your boss wants you to fire him, but that's not fair

106 2

Comments

ShannyAK 16

I get why your boss wants you to fire him, but that's not fair

106 2
fishstick557 14

I forget who told me but it was a buddy who was in your situation I think he had like bodyguards or police with him I can't remember but your safety is priority in this situation. Good luck OP

8 2
AKGirlinSD 20

I thought the HR person does the firing, with the boss present. At least, that's how it has always been done at every job I've worked at. The boss is a coward, shows lack of leadership skills, and appears to be a pussy. Good luck OP!

7 0
manaallovesfmls 19

Tell your boss that he's the one who should be firing people. It's not your responsibility. FYL

66 1
p36288 17

Then his boss might fire him right away

8 1
xNephilim 18

It could very well be OP's responsibility. Most places have different departments. OP could be a manager of one and that would make it their responsibility to fire people under them.

17 0
waffule365 16

My boss has made me fire people too and its not in my job description but you gotta do what the boss says.

8 0
HandaPitler 1

Write him a note and sign it with your bosses name

132 0
daniel_dd31 13

Include his address as well. Wait... is that going to far.

42 2
octopussperm125 18

Not at all, maybe include a phone number too just in case he's not home, u can track 'em down!

7 0
laya_fml 26

That's when you say you tried to convince your boss to keep him, and because you stood up for him you have to fire him. Blame the boss and run.

60 0
greenie213 23

Get a gun and fire him from at least twenty feet away.

38 2
sarah6786 14

or have greenie take him down for you.

12 0
fmlyaya 4

I hope he doesn't shoot the messenger.

9 0
andyyroxx 20

I have Cthulhu's number. He's busy these days but he may consider it.

30 1
GracesDelirium 9

I shot him an email, he says he's free next Tuesday. I'll need your name, address, bank, and social security number, OP.

15 0
andyyroxx 20

Email - you're brilliant! His fax machine and pager are out of commission.

9 0
picante72 24

Tell him through voicemail or email 5 mintues before you get off work. Then get in your car and take a trip far out of town for the weekend.

14 0
Shmatterhorn 38

Problem is that the idiot boss might make it into a permanent vacation. I do not envy OP's position.

1 0
DocBastard 38

Steroids shrinks your balls, so he literally won't have the balls to attack you. Either that or he'll have a huge 'roid rage explosion and grind you into pulp.

51 6
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18

I did steroids once. They're those tgings where you butter down wooden stairs and try to walk down them without falling, correct?

10 1