Work: Today, my boss gave me the task of firing a recently-hired coworker...

By cthulhu help me - 01/03/2013 18:22 - United States - Cabot

Today, my boss gave me the task of firing a recently-hired coworker next Friday. This guy spends most of his off-hours working out, probably abusing the fuck out of steroids, and to whom prison is like a bed-and-breakfast. I fear for my life by this point. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 665

You deserved it 2 829

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
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Same thing different taste

By HelpMe1 - 06/11/2014 06:53 - Indonesia - Jakarta

Today, my boss told me to fire the unstable, former military, gun nut employee. He's been making death threats to his supervisors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 247

You deserved it 2 951

I don't wanna…

By Anonymous - 28/11/2015 06:57 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my spineless shitwhip of a boss made me go fire a notoriously abusive employee. I had to act like firing him was my decision, even though I'm the secretary. Now I get to live in constant fear that the guy was serious when he threatened to find out where I live and kill me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 872

You deserved it 1 707

By NotJobbing - 11/08/2015 23:05 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my lazy bastard of a co-worker punched me straight in the jaw because he didn't get the promotion I did. Being his new manager, I fired him. A few hours later, I was fired for "abusing" my power. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 451

You deserved it 3 151

By AnonUser464 - 08/01/2013 16:40 - United States

Today, my boss called me over to his office; he wanted me to fire four hardworking employees. One of them was the girl I was going to ask out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 517

You deserved it 3 424

By :( - 06/06/2013 23:37 - United States

Today, at my new job at a funeral home, my boss threatened to fire me if I didn't "lighten the hell up" while dealing with our grieving clients. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 911

You deserved it 4 757

By Anonymous - 01/11/2014 18:59 - United States - Deatsville

Today, my boss is still refusing to fire my psychotic coworker, who's made it his mission to insult, annoy, bully and threaten me every day into making me quit. My boss is convinced the guy just has "assburger's" and that the company would get sued if we fired him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 999

You deserved it 3 498

Just Say Yes

By bringthemback - 29/03/2014 10:34 - United States - Columbia

Today, my boss decided to have the whole staff drug tested and fire everyone who failed. Out of an original staff of 14 people, only my boss, two coworkers and I remain. I now have four times my normal workload and am seriously thinking maybe I should've said "Yes" to drugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 113

You deserved it 4 257

By Anonymous - 09/07/2016 15:14

Today, I overheard my boss talking about me on the phone. Turns out he was drunk off his ass when he gave the go-ahead to hire me, and he's now searching for any excuse to legally fire me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 977

You deserved it 912

By anonymous - 31/03/2015 16:47 - United States - Denver

Today, I was fired from job as a personal trainer. Why? Because I was working out with a friend while off-duty. Apparently, working out with a friend on a day off means I am training them under the table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 867

You deserved it 2 734

By Anon - 27/08/2015 08:37 - United States

Today, I was telling my coworker that I was considering quitting the shady, 50-shades-of-scum business we work at. He snitched to our boss, who quickly fired me on bullshit charges of incompetence, theft, and workplace bullying. I guess I'm not getting a good reference from him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 380

You deserved it 5 856

HandaPitler 1

Saturday 2 March 2013 2:59

Write him a note and sign it with your bosses name

ShannyAK 16

Saturday 2 March 2013 2:56

I get why your boss wants you to fire him, but that's not fair

Comments

ColbyGB 13

Saturday 2 March 2013 3:24

Well, you have one week, start Hittin the roids!

Kalipczo 21

Saturday 2 March 2013 3:27

Fire him via letter or email.. Less confrontative. Try to be nice about it and push the blame on your boss

icepick23 12

Saturday 2 March 2013 3:27

May the force be with you.

profligatesoul 18

Saturday 2 March 2013 3:44

Show that MFer who's boss and can his ass.

theprivateman 1

Saturday 2 March 2013 3:45

one word... "witnesses"

Shmatterhorn 38

Saturday 2 March 2013 5:45

Agreed. OP should have someone else in the area when he delivers the boss's pink slip, if only for his own protection. I'd suggest someone from the legal department, if that is available.