Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. The lights kept on...

By KayleeXLoVe21 - 03/11/2011 23:48 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. The lights kept on going on and off. Why? The lights are activated by "clap on, clap off." It killed the mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 926

You deserved it 9 739

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Same thing different taste

Cute but annoying

By Anonymous - 17/12/2010 17:08 - United States

Today, while on my honeymoon with my new wife, I tried to be romantic by installing a clapper to the lights in our room. As things progressed, the noise of our love making triggered the lights on and off repeatedly. She began to laugh and we ended up just calling it an early night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 403

You deserved it 14 011

By teegtwo - 22/07/2014 05:55 - United States

Today, my boyfriend said we can't have sex with the light on anymore. He said he can never finish because the face I make when I orgasm makes him laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 011

You deserved it 27 001

Pick your moments, dude!

By Anonymous - 11/10/2019 00:01

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic night. As we were having sex, he decided to say, "Look mom, no hands!" and it totally ruined the mood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 908

You deserved it 346

By Anonymous - 02/08/2019 02:00

Today, my husband and I were having sex. It was stormy outside, and when lightning flashed through the window, he screamed like a little girl and scrambled off the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 947

You deserved it 297

By Anonymous - 27/07/2016 20:32

Today, when the power went out, my wife said it was too bad we couldn't have sex by candlelight since she had just started her period. The only time she brings up sex is when we can't do it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 576

You deserved it 1 737

By Anonymous - 06/01/2011 06:03 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on. My boyfriend noticed that every time I'm about to climax, I hit my head on something. Whether it's a wall or his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 481

You deserved it 6 148

By anonymous - 08/12/2011 10:37 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. As soon as I began to climax, he started repeatedly asking, "Are you done? Are you done yet? Are you done?" Well, NOW I am. Thanks, honey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 152

You deserved it 4 293

By geewhy - 26/12/2012 21:20 - United States - South Park

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he flicks my clitoris just right, my legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 710

You deserved it 5 442

What is it?

By Anonymous - 06/08/2009 22:46 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, I had my first orgasm. He thought something was wrong, so he stopped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 192

You deserved it 8 221

Go-faster stripes

By Anonymous - 25/08/2022 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. We kept the lights on for a change and he asked me, "Babe, what's that on your tummy?" They're my stretch marks. Sex and body confidence ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 162

You deserved it 229

daysgoby902 6

Friday 4 November 2011 9:15

it would have been awesome if you were on drugs

559NVUS 3

Friday 4 November 2011 9:29

Well then you should've stopped clapping your hands from all the excitement, oh wait...Nice :)

Comments

chynaaaa 0

Wednesday 14 December 2011 0:30

Today I was finna smash my hubby wen he realized he ain't bring no condom, buht we both wanted it so bad dat he was willin to use a ziploc bag....

didthatreallyhap_fml 14

Thursday 29 December 2011 8:09

lol WTF?!?!?

Chloeee1995 1

Monday 9 January 2012 23:37

I would find a different room to do it in.. Haha(:

Cosmic_Horror 1

Tuesday 24 January 2012 11:54

Those things usually have an override switch. Either you have a terrible light system or you and your boyfriend are the laziest people in the world.

xX_LilSammie_Xx 4

Wednesday 1 February 2012 5:40

Ruined the mood? I'd take it as a challenge to see if we could create a strobe light effect.

BenTaz 7

Sunday 17 June 2012 3:04

Sorry you got the clap.

totis0615 2

Monday 25 June 2012 9:53

This made me crack up. I really needed a good laugh. Sorry I know it must have sucked for you since u posted it and all :)

hockeykyle10 5

Saturday 7 July 2012 21:16

Is your cooter really that loose?

destybabyy 1

Wednesday 11 July 2012 3:29

Hahahahahahahaha Dude I started cracking up

Polkadot_492 6

Monday 19 November 2012 6:23

doesn't matter, had sex

melkymac101 17

Sunday 23 December 2012 4:53

FAP FAP FAP

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The Top

Today, my neighbour from across the road phoned me at work telling me there was a fire engine outside my house and a lot of smoke. I drove home in a panic, smashing a rear light on a post and getting flashed by a speed camera. It wasn't my house. The firemen were putting out a bonfire next door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 856

You deserved it 6 630

Today, I got home from visiting my long-distance girlfriend. I spent $366 to get a plane ticket to visit her for the week. The day after I arrived there, she broke up with me and I had to buy a ticket for an earlier flight home. With fees and penalties, I paid around $550 to be broken up with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 711

You deserved it 5 223

The Top

Today, I got a ticket from a cop for not riding my bike in the bike lane. I wasn't riding in the bike lane because I was avoiding construction work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 099

You deserved it 3 970

Today, it's my mom's birthday. I woke up at midnight to be the first to tell her happy birthday. When I awoke in the morning, I decided to bake her a cake. Little did I know my whole family was going out to lunch to celebrate. I wasn't invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 572

You deserved it 3 420

Today, I still get irrationally angry and distracted when my teacher refers to bodily functions as “poop, pee, number 1 & 2, etc.” and calls things icky. I’m literally in nursing school with an instructor who talks like Elmo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 536

You deserved it 163

Today, after a long and stressful week, all I wanted was some time to myself with a few beers and a good video game. My girlfriend apparently disliked this, because she started blasting Cardi B, ran the vacuum behind me, and poured my beer down the sink when I used the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 951

You deserved it 219

Today, my family went out to dinner at a seafood restaurant. While we were eating our food, my grandma demanded to see the manager, and loudly complained that her fish was "too fishy". FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 076

You deserved it 4 238

Today, my boyfriend, who is also a coworker, proposed to me in the parking of the store we work at when it was dark out. He came up behind me, and, thinking it was some creep, I stabbed him with my car keys. The scar will alway help him remember our engagement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 007

You deserved it 184