Love: Today, my boyfriend gave me a hickey. On my forehead. FML

By IloveJapan - 02/04/2012 14:02 - Japan

Today, my boyfriend gave me a hickey. On my forehead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 445

You deserved it 10 161

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 01/07/2013 18:03 - United States - Pleasantville

Today, I saw my girlfriend for the first time in weeks. She had a hickey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 435

You deserved it 6 294

Dominion

By baby.momma2 - 26/11/2020 19:58

Today, I told my boyfriend I was unsure of the future of our relationship, so he gave me a gigantic hickey to "show the world that I'm his." I work as a cashier and see people I know personally on a daily basis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 850

You deserved it 311

By tkrause - 01/04/2013 17:17 - Canada - Nelson

Today, my boyfriend came over with a hickey on his neck. He thinks "The vacuum did it" is a believable excuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 452

You deserved it 4 165

By anonymous - 04/10/2017 20:51

Today, my boyfriend keeps trying to convince me that the hickey on his neck was from his friend attacking him with a vacuum cleaner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 494

You deserved it 431

By 352 - 18/04/2012 20:18 - United States

Today, I somehow managed to hit my head on a first aid kit. I now have a cut on my forehead and my boyfriend just keeps laughing from the irony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 329

You deserved it 4 183

By amber - 19/04/2012 18:00 - United States - Saint Paul

Today, my boyfriend gave me acne cream for my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 737

You deserved it 4 782

By Maria - 14/03/2017 15:00 - United Kingdom - York

Today, my boyfriend had his arm around me. He pulled me closer, so I looked up, thinking maybe he wanted a kiss. Turns out he was picking his nose over my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 663

You deserved it 403

By nonymous human subject - 14/11/2015 20:02 - United States - Palo Alto

Today, I got to my human anatomy class with a hickey on my neck. Since I sit in the front row, my professor noticed and decided to call me to the front. He then started talking about ruptured blood vessels and hickeys, all while as I served as the subject. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 559

You deserved it 7 876

By Username - 22/02/2010 05:44 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 103

You deserved it 3 325

By LonelyHeart - 22/10/2009 12:09 - United States

Today, I surprised my boyfriend at work, only to notice that his neck was covered in hickies. The night before, he texted me saying he needed alone time to get his mind together. Looks like he got together with another mind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 716

You deserved it 3 340

rubberduckie94 13

Monday 2 April 2012 18:52

And you sat still long enough for him to give you one there?

taytoc 10

Monday 2 April 2012 18:49

Om nom

Comments

failboat13 5

Monday 2 April 2012 23:15

My ex did that too!!!! Wouldn't go away for a week!!!!

LennyComa 39

Monday 2 April 2012 23:15

Why...i mean hickeys are ugly anyways...ah well

abbynoelle 1

Monday 2 April 2012 23:29

My bf tried to do that to me before he got deployed. He said he was marking his territory lol

Lukeloveshugs 8

Monday 2 April 2012 23:34

I gave my girlfriend a hickey on her butt once.

ahhdorablepeach 0

Tuesday 3 April 2012 0:02

My (ex) boyfriend did that to me once... Have you been hanging out with him lately?

staceyjayne1992 5

Tuesday 3 April 2012 0:03

Haha

speccolo420 0

Tuesday 3 April 2012 0:21

I highly doubt that...

gonad_gobbler 1

Tuesday 3 April 2012 0:21

Wtf, are you dating a frieken' leech"!?

saraaa123 0

Tuesday 3 April 2012 0:25

Hahahahhaahhahahahah -___- my bad :$

CptZoe 10

Tuesday 3 April 2012 0:30

Happens to the best of us, love.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 041

You deserved it 21 135

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate with each other for the first time. He shoved his hand down my pants, touched about an inch away from my clitoris, and whispered, "Cummm" in my ear. I doubt I'll have an orgasm ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 023

You deserved it 4 247

The Top

Today, after waking up from a bad migraine which caused my teeth to clench, I found out that I broke a molar. A dentist told me it split down to the bone, so I need root canal and an extended crown. Then they told me the tooth below had also broke and has to be pulled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 928

You deserved it 83

Today, I made a nice meal for myself and sat down to eat. Suddenly, my dad burst into my room saying, “We have to go.” This isn’t the first time it’s happened, nor was it an emergency. My family just doesn’t tell me when we have plans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 790

You deserved it 177

Today, I had to endure a long story about how and why my brother shaves his pubes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 754

You deserved it 4 861

Today, at lifeguard class, I played a victim while my peers strapped me to the backboard in the water. When I was strapped down, I got wood in a wet swimsuit. My hands were strapped down so I could do nothing to hide it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 448

You deserved it 10 090

Today, after getting out of the shower, I was in a good mood. So I decided to run around the house naked, then play air guitar while air drying, just for fun. My blinds were open, and the men in the Fedex truck in my front yard did have fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 629

You deserved it 34 566

Today, at the gym, a guy yelled at me to stop lifting more than his son, because I was embarrassing him by being a girl and lifting more. His son must have been 15 and I almost qualified for the Olympics, but sure I’ll hold back to spare the feelings of a misogynistic 15 year-old little bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 288

You deserved it 186

Same thing different taste

Dominion

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