Love: Today, my boyfriend informed me that in the event of a zombie... - FML

By Anonymous - 04/02/2010 08:29 - United States

Today, my boyfriend informed me that in the event of a zombie apocalypse, he'd kill me before I got infected. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 792

You deserved it 7 817

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Same thing different taste

Good to know

By DeadScared - 19/09/2011 00:23 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend kindly informed me that if I ever got bitten during a zombie apocalypse, he'd love me enough to beat me to death with a tire iron. He said this because he's been having vivid dreams about it happening. I honestly don't know whether he's joking or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 015

You deserved it 3 567

By Anonymous - 21/08/2015 19:02 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, I overheard my husband telling his friend that he wished a zombie apocalypse would happen in real life, so he could take me out back and shoot me without having to worry about going to prison. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 566

You deserved it 2 628

By Anonymous - 24/08/2012 21:10 - United Kingdom - Walsall

Today, a baseball bat fell on my head while my boyfriend and I were cuddling. The same baseball bat that he keeps next to the bed, because he genuinely fears a zombie outbreak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 228

You deserved it 3 875

By zombieguyswife - 28/06/2012 23:44 - United States - Branson

Today, I found out that the only way I can convince my husband to start working out is by convincing him that we are training for when the "zombie outbreak" happens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 085

You deserved it 3 983

By Abendigo77 - 14/01/2013 04:49 - United States - Healdsburg

Today, my vegan boyfriend told me that if he were forced to kill either his cat or me, he'd kill me because he "would never kill an animal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 565

You deserved it 6 842

By sabrinatarmine_ - 22/07/2013 02:35 - United States - Carmel Valley

Today, I told my boyfriend I had diabetes. He won't talk to me anymore because he thinks I'll infect him with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 624

You deserved it 4 070

By TBTC - 31/08/2012 07:16 - France - Le G?vre

Today, I was out apartment hunting with my boyfriend. We visited a marvelous place that ticked all the boxes on our requirement checklist, but my boyfriend was unenthused. There was just one small detail that I hadn’t factored in: it's very badly located if ever zombies attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 407

You deserved it 5 424

By purged - 08/06/2013 23:43 - United States - Mechanicsville

Today, my boyfriend and I watched the new movie "The Purge." After the movie, I jokingly asked him that if the U.S. had such a purge in real life, would he participate, and who would he kill first. Without missing a beat, he said, "you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 067

You deserved it 8 647

By drake86 - 09/01/2013 16:42 - United Kingdom - Helensburgh

Today, I got genuinely annoyed at myself when I realised I probably lack the skills to survive a Zombie apocalypse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 929

You deserved it 33 065

Wuss

By scaredy cat - 09/08/2020 14:02

Today, my boyfriend is completely obsessed with zombie and horror movies. I don’t care what he watches, the only problem is the big wuss has horrible thrashing nightmares. Last night he thrashed so hard, he elbowed me in the face. I have a big swollen purple knot right on my forehead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 570

You deserved it 183

Next

Top comments

damienwatkins 0

Thursday 4 February 2010 16:06

how cute

Rota 0

Thursday 4 February 2010 16:07

That's love.

Comments

SumKid_fml 0

Saturday 6 February 2010 21:30

Lol, ur boyfriend plays way 2 much Left 4 Dead

serenaaaa_fml 0

Sunday 7 February 2010 4:27

haha. he's a keeper :)

sadmcphee 0

Monday 8 February 2010 6:13

234, totally!!!

joey112 0

Monday 8 February 2010 19:53

That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard! He's a keeper!

BOONJAGGA 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 6:38

In a corny way that's romantic. Definitely not a "FML" moment. I'd do the same for my boyfriend. . .I guess.

IHATEMYLIFE201 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 15:38

what a good frien(;

Sweets_wtc 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 7:07

wow you're stupid, thats such an adorable compliment.

notnormal 0

Friday 12 February 2010 0:27

very cute! And he's also saying that he would sacrifice his own desire (having you alive) if it meant saving you from the torment of being a zombie! It's a compliment to the nth degree!

Shorty43 0

Friday 12 February 2010 2:29

thats ok my boyfriend told me he would have to kill me in a zombie apocalypse but that he would feel bad afterwards

deux_fml 0

Friday 12 February 2010 8:46

Well yeah. Mercy killing in the name of love.

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Keywords

Family Miscellaneous Cats DIY Poopoo peepee Work Awkward Management Am I overreacting? Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Frustration Transportation Dogs Animals ADHD Dating Love Mental health Health Anxiety Technology Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, my girlfriend reached into my pocket to get my keys so she could get something out of my car. When she yanked them out, the condom that we'd just used flew up into the air and landed on the floor in front of her entire family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 885

You deserved it 61 102

Today, I had to pick up my brother and his girlfriend from the bar at 2:00am because they were too drunk to drive themselves and had no money for an Uber. Five minutes into the ride, they started going at it in the back of my car. I don't think I'll be doing favors again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 655

You deserved it 532

The Top

Today, I realized that what I thought for years was my country's National Anthem, is actually the theme song of a TV show. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 169

You deserved it 57 667

Today, a man on a bike was so preoccupied with making lewd comments about another girl's behind that he drove straight into mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 112

You deserved it 103

Today, I had to repeat my order in Starbucks three times because the barista was staring at my chest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 571

You deserved it 12 431

Today, my mother gave me a bottle of stool softeners as a gift at my baby shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 680

You deserved it 4 044

Today, I have a rash all over my face because yesterday my boyfriend broke up with me. Apparently, I am allergic to the something in the tissues with which I was blowing my nose and wiping away my tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 660

You deserved it 3 007

Today, I found out you really can burn down a kitchen by boiling an egg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 474

You deserved it 840